I. Gen 2:18-25, God’s Uptopia Part 2, Man and
Woman in Paradise
A few weeks ago we studied the sixth day of Creation. There God said
“Let us make man in our image and likeness …male and female he created
them” (Gen 1:26,27). Gen 2:4-25 is an in depth look at the sixth day. Last week
we examined the creation of Adam and how God blessed him with a
garden/temple, a river of life, a vocation, and the privilege of being the first
member of God’s kingdom.
Today’s text describes the last of Gen 2, the creation of Eve. The Bible
portrays this as an occasion for delight and rejoicing. God created Eve to bless
Adam, and he created Adam to delight Eve. This perspective is unique. In Greek
mythology the gods created the female sex to punish man. Neil Anderson
described how the men in the jungle tribes of Papua New Guinea would not
sleep in the same building with their wives Why? They feared that their wives
inferiority and weakness would rub off on them.
Things are not much better in North America. Men and women’s roles are
in disarray. Men oppress women. Feminism has responded with selfish
individualism, often culminating in the abandonment of husband and children, the
sexual exploitation of men, or the elevation of career over husband and children.
Gloria Steinem sums up the current mood. “A woman needs a man as much as a
fish needs a bicycle.” Contrary to feminist claims, patriarchy is not the problem.
Sin is the problem, and both men and women have an liberal supply of its
corrupting power.
The passage before us describes sex roles in paradise—how God
intended men and women to relate—joyful, loving, caring relationship.
It is a tender story. We will explore it through our world view template—
Creation, Fall, and Redemption.
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A. CREATION
1. Vs 18-20 Adam’s need for a Helper/Companion
18 Then
the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him
a helper fit for him. 19 So out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the
field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would
call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The
man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of
the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him.
“It is not good that the man should be alone.” But, in the immediate
presence of God how could man be alone? The text gives us a hint. God says, “it
is not good that man should be alone”, and we expect him to respond, “I will
make him a companion.” But he doesn’t. He says “I will make him a helper.” Why
a helper? Adam was not alone in the sense that God was insufficient to supply
his social needs. He was alone in the sense that he could not accomplish the
task to which God called Him without a companion, a companion of equal value
to himself.
Eve had a specific role. She was Adam’s helper. God made Adam first to
signify that he is the head of the relationship. God created Eve equal to Adam but
subordinate to him. However, God intended this to be a delightful subordination.
The Son’s submission to His Father was to be the model. Adam was to be a
head to Eve in the same way that the Father is the Head of His Son (1Cor 11:13).
For what task then was the woman created to be a helper? You will
remember that God commanded Adam to be fruitful, to multiply, to fill the earth
and subdue it. He also commanded him to work and keep the garden. God
created Eve to “help” him with these two tasks. He could not accomplish them
alone. God created her to help Adam bear children, raise them in the fear of God,
and support and encourage Adam in his vocation.
The Word, “helper” does not indicate inferiority. It speaks of
complimentary function. We know this because scripture uses the same word to
describe God. E.g. (Ex 18:4) Moses said, “The God of my father was my helper,
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and delivered me from the sword of Pharaoh.”1 And. John 14:16 reads, " And I
will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever."
God gave Adam sovereignty over the animals. The act of naming them
makes this clear. God knew that no animal would be suitable for Adam. They
were not his equals. They were inferior. But, God wanted Adam to discover this
truth for himself. He wanted him to be forever convinced of the vast gulf between
animal and human companionship.
Animals were inadequate because Adam knew he needed an equal. He
needed an equal to compliment him, to make e up for his lacks—to be strong
where he was weak, to compensate for his deficiencies. God created her to be a
team-mate, not a competitor, to compliment him not compete with him.
So in summary, God created Adam and Eve’s relationship to be one of
delight, mutual love, order, affection, and outpoured service. Adam’s need for a
helper teaches us that he was incomplete without her.
The biblical formula for men and women’s roles is equal in value, mutually
dependent, hierarchical order, and complimentary function.
2. Vs 21-23 Adam’s Joy
21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took
one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had
taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the
man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called
Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”
1
Christian feminists teach that Adam only became Eve’s head after the fall, and that his headship was Eve’s
punishment for sin. In this view, redemption removes women from male headship, and restores Eve’s
autonomy. But this view cannot be correct. Why? Before sin entered the world God had already established
order in their relationship in four ways.
1.
God created Adam first.
2.
God covenanted with Adam before He created Eve.
3.
God created Eve to be Adam’s companion/helper.
4.
When Eve sinned Adam was responsible.
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21a “God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man.” Here is the first use
of anesthesia. God takes Eve from Adam painlessly. (This will be important
later).
21b “Took one of his ribs and closed the place up with flesh.” To
emphasize Eve’s equality, God creates her from Adam’s side, from His own
flesh. Although God made Adam from the dust of the ground, to emphasize Eve’s
dignity, He created her from Adam’s rib.
22b “And He brought her to the man.” With this act God institutes the first
marriage. Marriage is a divine institution. Notice, God created an Eve not a
Steve. Homosexual marriage is an abomination to God. Heterosexual marriage is
the first and most important social institution. It is ordained by God. Anyone that
messes with marriage messes with God and does so at their peril.
In summary, God presented the animals to Adam and he named them.
But they were inadequate. They were not his equal. They could not compliment
him. So, Adam’s exclamation, “bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh”
expresses his delight in the equality of this lovely creature with whom he will
share his life and vocation. With great joy he beholds the woman with which God
has blessed him.
3. Vs 24,25 Marriage as God intended it…
24 Therefore,
a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and
they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were
not ashamed.”
24 “A man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife.” With
the word “wife” Moses universalizes the previous verses and applies them to all
marriage. This verse also draws out the implications of servant leadership. The
male does the leaving.
24b He is to “hold fast to his wife.” This means God created Adam to be a
“one woman man.” It means loyalty. God is a covenant maker. God created
Adam and Eve to imitate Him and glorify Him by making lifelong marriage
covenants.
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24c “And they shall become one flesh. Note: It is the husband’s “leaving”
and “holding fast” to his wife that makes them “One Flesh:” They are “one flesh.”
This means the marriage bond is God’s super-glue. It supersedes the parental
bond. It is the most important and sacred human relationship. Neither parents,
siblings, other lovers, friends, or pets are to ever displace or replace the marriage
relationship. Culture rises and falls on the strength of this bond.
God intended that Adam’s servant-love be the fuel that powers this
relationship. Eve’s job was to respond to his love. One-flesh unity is profound.2 It
is the most sacred unity in human experience. Only a life of mutual service and
love is capable of teasing out its implications.
Last 25 “The man and his wife were naked and were not ashamed.” They
experienced innocent delight without sinful self-awareness. God made them
sexual, and he made them for each other. Great sex is a function of great
relationships.
In summary, they felt no inferiority, shame, or embarrassment in each
other’s presence. “There is, notes Derek Kidner, “in God’s true pattern, perfect
ease between them . [It] is the fruit of perfect love, which has no alloy of greed,
distrust, or dishonour;”3
God created Adam and placed him in a paradise/utopia. But it wasn’t
complete without the presence of a helper/companion.
B. FALL
The Fall was a terrible perversion of all that God intended. The fall
occurred because Adam loved the gift (Eve) more than the Giver (God). In other
words, he committed idloatry. He preferred the companion/helper that God gave
Him more than God Himself. Notice how Eve initiates and Adam responds—
2
Paul tells us that sexual union begins it. (1 Co 6:16-17) "Or do you not know that he who is joined to a
prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.” But he who is
joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him."
3
Kidner, D. 1967. Genesis: An Introduction and Commentary. Tyndale Old Testament Commentaries. Vol. 1
(71). InterVarsity Press: Downers Grove, IL
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(Gen. 3:6) "So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a
delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of
its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate."
Adam should have gently rebuked Eve. But he feared his wife’s rejection
more than he feared God. His fear turned God’s order upside down: Eve became
the leader and Adam the follower. God described Adam’s sin with these words…
(Gen. 3:17) “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the
tree of which I commanded you, ‘You shall not eat of it…’”
Because Adam failed this test, God judged his marriage with disorder and
pain.
(Gen. 3:16) "To the woman he said, ….’ Your desire shall be for your husband, and he
shall rule over you.’”
This is why women try to control and dominate their husbands today. It is
also why husbands try to selfishly oppress and use their wives.
This has been the story of male-female relationships throughout the
millenia. Immediately men began to abuse their authority. They began to love self
more than their wives. Women quit helping their husbands and began resisting
them. In Gen 4:19 Lamech began the horrible practice of polygamy. In Gen 12
Abraham used Sarah to protect himself from Pharaoh. Later Jacob mistreated
Leah. Shechem raped Dinah (Gen 34).
In the same way, Women began to usurp male authority. Lot’s wife
rejected his counsel and paid with her life. Sarah manipulated Abraham to get a
son through Hagar . Rebecca conspired to deceive Jacob. Potiphar’s wife tries to
seduce Joseph.
Modern Gender feminism is just the continuation and culmination of this curse.
“The root of the problem, like so much else,” writes Janie Cheaney in World
Magazine, “goes back to the Garden. The man neglected his leadership role,
allowing the woman to make a bad decision, which broke their bond with God
and set their relationship at odds.”4
4
Janie Cheaney, “Male Call,” World Magazine, Nov 5, 2011.
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C. REDEMPTION
When people put their trust in the gospel, men and women’s relationships
take a step back towards paradise/utopia. The gospel restores God’s initial plan.
Ephesians five is a return to Eden. The cross makes that return possible.
1. Ephesians 5:22-31 is a Return to Eden
Ephesians five describes life in Eden before sin.
a) RESTORE BIBLICAL FEMININITY
“Wives submit to your husband as to the Lord” (Eph 5:22). Despite his
patent imperfections, your safety is in submission to your husband’s authority.
Your submission will force God to deal with your husband. Tremble and fear lest
you come out from under God’s appointed authority. If Paul told slaves to obey
their master with “fear and trembling,” how much more wives? (Eph 6:5-8).
Yes, you are probably smarter and more spiritual than your husband, but
who is right is seldom the issue. The issue is this: God protects and blesses
those that yield to his divine order because they believe that God is good.
This also applies to wives married to unbelievers. If you want to save your
husband, submit to the authority that God has given him. (1 Pet 3:1-2 )"Wives,
be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word,
they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives— when they see
your respectful and pure conduct.”
“Doormats” can’t do this. They are too weak. Submission to an imperfect
husband requires a strong woman. Only women of profound character, vibrant
faith, with deep running rivers of spiritual life are strong enough for this mission.
b) RESTORE BIBLICAL HUSBANDRY
“Husbands, love your wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself up
for her” (Eph 5:25). Adam’s sin was passivity. The willingness to provide
leadership is an expression of love. It is the antidote to Adam’s passivity. Men,
your wife will be vulnerable to the degree that you are passive. Servant leaders
protect their wives, they make them secure by providing servant leadership.
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Godly husbands serve by leading. They serve by pursuing God’s direction
for their family. They serve by calling their wives and children to scripture and
prayer. Husband’s cover and protect their wives when they wash them with
God’s word. Washing Eve with the word was part of Adam’s headship. As we just
seen, God commanded Adam not to eat of the forbidden tree before He created
Eve (Gen 2:16-17). This was intentional. God wanted Adam to exercise headship
by communicating God’s word to Eve. The requirement has not changed. That is
why Paul reminds each husband to wash his wife with God’s word. (Eph 5:26-27)
"That [the husband] might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of
water with the word."
Husbands also lead by serving. They serve in practical matters—sending
his wife away for a two day vacation by herself while they watch the kids, etc.
The decision is never shall I serve or shall I lead. The two cannot be
separated. It is always both.
2. The Cross
The cross makes Ephesians five possible by propitiating God’s wrath,
imputing Christ’s righteousness to us, and motivating godly behavior.
c) PROPITIATION
Our rebellion against God’s marital order provokes his wrath. It is only
removed at infinite expense to His Son. Jesus’ died to atone for male passivity
and selfishness. He also died to atone for female selfishness and rebellion..
d) IMPUTATION
Jesus has a bride, the church. He loves that bride perfectly. When a
husband believes the gospel God imputes that love him.
Jesus perfectly submitted to His Father. When a woman believes the
gospel God imputes that submission to her.
e) MOTIVATION
Christ’s love for his enemies motivates husbands to love their wives when
they are disagreeable. It is sacrificial love. It is our happiness at Christ’s expense.
That motivates me to make my wife happy at my own expense.
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Christ’s loves God more than his bride. Christ did not put His bride before
the Father. He did not fear His Bride’s rejection. We cannot move him from the
Father’s will. When Peter tried to distract Jesus from the cross, He did not yield.
Rather, (Mt 16:23) "He turned and said to Peter “Get behind me, Satan! You are
a hindrance to me. For you are not setting your mind on the things of God, but on
the things of man.”
In the same way, Christ’s submission to His Father models every wife’s
duty. Jesus was equal with the Father, but different in function. The Father asked
him to go to the cross, and he submitted with joy. He was the Father’s perfect
helper/servant.
Like Eve from Adam, God the Father brought Christ’s Bride forth from His
side, but there was no anesthesia. The Father did not put Him to sleep first.
Because her sins had to be atoned with blood and pain, she was metaphorically
taken from his side while he was fully conscious. Christ’s bride was birthed with
great agony.5
D. APPLICATION: CLOSING QUESTIONS
Husband’s, are you trying to love your wife sacrificially? Is it her happiness
at your expense?
Do you love God more than your wife? Whose disapproval do you fear:
God’s, or do your wife’s? God will test you. (Anecdote of my young insured).
Wives: Who are you submitting to, your husband or Christ?
Do you encourage your husband to lead? Are you his companion/helper?
Redemption restores honor to the role of helper. Redeemed wives seek to
discover their husband’s calling and then give themselves to helping him
accomplish it.
5
M. Henry: “Adam was a figure of him that was to come; for out of the side of Christ, the second Adam, his
spouse the church was formed, when he slept the sleep, the deep sleep, of death upon the cross, in order to
which his side was opened, and there came out blood and water, blood to purchase his church and water to
purify it to himself.”
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Is your husband, and his calling, a greater relational priority than your
children, your parents, your female friends?
Couples: Does your marriage express the intimacy and romance that God
intended? In the words of Matthew Henry—
“The woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not made out of his head to
rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be
equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be beloved.”
Is your marriage moving back to Paradise, or is it a relational
battleground? “You desire shall be for your husband, but he shall rule over you.”
Single Women: Are you looking for a man that is willing to lead you? Do
not expect a young man to have this all together. Rather, look for a man with
potential, a man willing to obey and follow Christ no matter the cost.
Single Men: Are you willing to initiate with a woman? Are you willing to
lead her? This means doing that which pleases God despite her disapproval. Are
you clear on the differences between men and women? Are you willing to treat
her with the deepest respect and tenderness? Do see marriage as an opportunity
to die that she might live?
Engaged Couples: Are you practicing all of this during your engagement?
If you are and it isn’t working, it is best to break it off now. Don’t marry someone
to change them. It won’t happen. What you see is what you get.
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