Chapter 8
Interpersonal Processes & Behavior
Effective Communication
I didn’t say that I
didn’t say it. I said
that I didn’t say that
I said it. I want to
make that very clear.
Communication
Communication - the evoking of a shared or
common meaning in another person
Interpersonal communication - communication
between two or more people in an
organization
Communication
Communicator - the person originating the
message
Receiver - the person receiving a message
Perceptual screen - a window through which we
interact with people that influences the
quality, accuracy, and clarity of the
communication
Basic Interpersonal
Communication Model
Message
• Context
• Affect
Event X
Perceptual screens
Message - the thoughts and feelings that the
communicator is attempting to elicit in the receiver
Feedback loop - the pathway that completes twoway communication
Communication
Language - the words, their pronunciation, and the
methods of combining them used & understood by
a group of people
Data - uninterpreted and unanalyzed facts
Information - data that have been interpreted,
analyzed, & and have meaning to some user
Richness - the ability of a medium or channel to elicit
or evoke meaning in the receiver
The Communication Process
Words That Create Distortions
Many people today use a vocabulary of
“filler words” that contribute to imprecise
language. The following words and phrases
distort communication because they’re
confusing and ambiguous to listeners:
Like you know
See
So
OK
Like oh my God I mean Basically
And all that
And everything like that
And whatever
‘n’ stuff
Communication Networks
Three Network Types
Independent,
decentralized
decision makers
(cowboys)
Centralized
decision makers
(commanders)
Connected,
decentralized
decision makers
(cyber-cowboys)
= Places where actions are taken and information is generated
= Centralized decision maker
Source: T.W. Malone, “Is Empowerment Just a Fad? Control, Decision Making and IT,” Sloan Management Review,
Winter 1997, pp. 23-35.
Three Common Small-Group
Networks
Chain
Wheel
All-Channel
Hierarchy of Channel Richness
Channel
richness
Richest
Type of
message
Information
medium
Nonroutine,
ambiguous
Face to face
talk
Telephone
Computer
Memos’
letters
Leanest
Routine,
clear
Flyers, bulletins
general reports
Coping With Rumors
Announce timetables for making important
decisions.
Explain decisions and behaviors that may appear
inconsistent or secretive.
Emphasize the downside, as well as the upside, of
current decisions and future plans.
Openly discuss worst case possibilities -it is almost
never as anxiety provoking as the unspoken
fantasy.
Implications for Managers
Less uncertainty, the greater the satisfaction
Less distortion in communication equals:
Incongruities between verbal and nonverbal
communiqués increase uncertainty and reduce
satisfaction.
The goal of perfect communication is
unattainable.
The issue of communication is critical to
motivation.
ACTIVE LISTENING
“You can not truly listen to anyone
and do anything else at the same
time.”
M. Scott Peck
Reflective Listening
Reflective Listening - the skill of listening
carefully to another person and repeating
back to the speaker the heard message
to correct any inaccuracies or
misunderstandings
This complex
process needs
to be divided to
be understood
What I heard you
say was we will
understand the
process better if we
break it into steps
Response
ADVICE
To make a judgment on the goodnessbadness or rightness/wrongness
To tell the sharer what he should do
Sets one person above the other
Says, “I know your situation better than you do.”
May put sharer on defensive
Moves focus from sharer to listener
INTERPRETATION
To teach
To tell what the problem means
To explain the cause of the problem
Gives information
Intellectualizes the conversation
(Moves it away from feelings)
Closes off further sharing
Moves focus from sharer to listener
SUPPORT
To reassure
To minimize the feeling
PROBING
To seek further information (a
question)
To tell the sharer what to talk about
Makes person feel less alone
Sometimes give “you just don’t understand my problem”
feeling
Minimizes feelings
Shifts focus from feelings of sharer to feelings of listener
Gets information
Limits areas about which sharer can talk
Moves focus from what sharer wants to say to what
listener wants to hear
PARAPHRASE
To check whether the responder
understands the message
To clarify the problem
Encourages the sharer to go on and explore his feelings
and ideas further
Communicates acceptance and concern to sharer
Levels of Empathy
Level One
The responder pays no attention to the content or feelings of the speaker. She ignores, argues with, denies,
evaluates, or judges both the content and the feeling expressed.
Level Two
The responder pays attention to the content of the message, but not the feelings of the sharer. He ignores,
denies or evaluates the feelings.
Level Three
The responder pays attention to both the feelings and the content of the sharer’s communication. She,
however, ‘hears’ only the verbal and surface level of the communication.
Level Four
The listener adds noticeably to the sharer’s expression, hearing feelings even deeper than those the speaker
was expressing. The response reflects concern, which encourages the sharer to go on. The listener responds
with accuracy to all feelings, communicating a full awareness of the sharer as a person.
Reflective Listening
Helps the receiver & communicator
clearly & fully understand the
message sent
Useful in problem solving
Reflective Listening
Reflective listening emphasizes
the personal elements of the communication
process
the feelings communicated in the message
responding to the communicator, not leading
the communicator
the role or receiver or audience
understanding people by reducing perceptual
distortions and interpersonal barriers
Reflective Listening:
4 Levels of Verbal Response
Affirm contact
Paraphrase the expressed
Clarify the implicit
Reflect “core” feelings
Effective Listening
Make eye contact.
Exhibit affirmative head nods and appropriate facial
expressions.
Avoid distracting actions or gestures.
Ask questions.
Paraphrase.
Avoid interrupting the speaker.
Don’t over talk.
Make smooth transitions between the roles of
speaker and listener.
Effective Listening
Find an area of interest.
Judge content and not delivery.
Hold your fire.
Listen for ideas.
Be flexible.
Resist distractions.
Keep your mind open.
Work at listening.
Steps To Effective Listening
Attending
Following
Reflecting
Responding
One-way Vs. Two-way
Communications
One-way communication Two-way communication
communication in which a
- a form of
person sends a message
communication in
to another person and no
which the
questions, feedback, or
communicator &
interaction follow
good for giving simple
directions
Fast but often less accurate
than 2-way communication
receiver interact
good for problem
solving
Five Keys to Effective
Supervisory Communication
Expressive speaking
Empathetic listening
Persuasive
leadership
Sensitivity to
feelings
Informative
management
Barriers to Effective Communication
Filtering
Selective
Perception
Defensiveness
Language
Barriers to Communication
Communication
Barriers factors that block
or significantly
distort successful
communication
Physical separation
Status differences
Status differences
Gender differences
Cultural diversity
Language
Message Influences
Factors that
influence
sent & received
messages
Gender
Defensive Communication
Defensive Communication - communication
that can be aggressive, attacking & angry,
or passive & withdrawing
Leads to
injured feelings
communication breakdowns
alienation
retaliatory behaviors
nonproductive efforts
problem solving failures
Defensive Communication
Defensive Behaviors
1 Evaluation
2 Control
3 Strategy
4 Neutrality
5 Superiority
6 Certainty
Supportive
Behaviors
1 Description
2 Problem
Orientation
3 Spontaneity
4 Empathy
5 Equality
6 Provisionalism
Nondefensive Communication
Nondefensive communication communication that is assertive,
direct,
& powerful
Provides
basis for defense when attacked
restores order, balance & effectiveness
You are feeling
really angry right
now.
Two Defensiveness Patterns
Subordinate Defensiveness characterized by passive,
submissive, withdrawing
behavior
Dominant Defensiveness characterized by active,
aggressive, attacking behavior
Defensive Tactics
B
o
s
s
Nondefensive Communication:
A Powerful Tool
Speaker exhibits self-control & self possession
Listener feels accepted rather than rejected
Characterized by
assertiveness
control
informative approach
centered
realism
honesty
Nonverbal Communication
Nonverbal communication - all elements of
communication that do not involve words
Four basic types
Proxemics - an individual’s perception & use of space
Kinesics - study of body movements, including
posture
Facial & eye behavior - movements that add cues for
the receiver
Paralanguage - variations in speech, such as pitch,
loudness, tempo, tone, duration, laughing, & crying
Proxemics: Territorial Space
Territorial space - bands of space extending
outward from the body; territorial space
differs from culture to culture
a = intimate <1.5’
b = personal 1.5-4’
c = social 4-12’
d = public >12’
a
b
c
d
Proxemics: Seating Dynamics
Seating dynamics - seating people in certain positions
according to the person’s purpose in communication
X O
Cooperation
X
O Communication
X
O X O
Competition
NonCommunication
O
Decoding Non-verbal Cues
He’s
unapproachable!
Boss fails to acknowledge
employee’s greeting
I wonder what
he’s hiding?
No eye contact
while
communicating
He’s angry! I’ll
stay out of his way!
Boss breathes
heavily & waves
arms
My opinion
doesn’t count
Manager sighs deeply
Gender and Communication
Does gender really
make a difference?
Differences:
Purpose
Level of Involvement
Style
Childhood -- Growing up in
Different Worlds.
Men
Emphasize Sports
Military Metaphors
Games – rules, boastful winners
Women
Girls Speak Sooner
Small Groups – same sex groups
Intimacy is Key
Emphasis on getting along
Gender Specific Behaviors
Men
Position
Problem Solving
Interruptions
Hierarchy
Independence
Talk to Report
Women
Personal
Process
Permission
Disclaimers
Upspeak
Solidarity
Talk to establish
Rapport
Cultural Context Effects
Cross-cultural Communication I
There are barriers caused
There are barriers caused
connotations.
There are barriers caused
differences.
There are barriers caused
among perceptions.
by semantics.
by word
by tonal
by differences
Cross-cultural Communications II
Assume differences until similarity is
proven.
Emphasize description rather than
interpretation or evaluation.
Practice empathy.
Treat your interpretations as a working
hypothesis.
What Do I Do If They Don’t Speak
My Language?
Verbal Behavior.
Clear, slow speech.
Repetition.
Simple sentences..
Active verbs.
Nonverbal Behavior.
Visual restatements.
Gestures.
Demonstrations.
Pauses.
Summaries..
What You Hear,
May Not Be What You See.
The Future
Workplace Diversity
Generational Issues –
technology, loyalty,
motivation, styles of communication
Boomers
Busters
Changing Role Models
Electronic Communication
Computer-mediated
Communication
Informational
databases
Electronic mail systems
Voice mail systems
Fax machine systems
Cellular phone systems
How Does CMC Affect
Communication?
Fast, immediate access to information
Immediate access to people in power
Instant information exchange across
distance
Makes schedules & office hours
irrelevant
May equalize group power
May equalize group participation
How Does CMC Affect
Communication?
Communication can become more
impersonal--interaction with a machine
Interpersonal skills may diminish--less tact,
less graciousness
Non-verbal cues lacking
Alters social context
Easy to become overwhelmed with
information
Encourages polyphasic activity
Tips for Effective Use of CMC
Strive for
message
completeness
Build in
feedback
opportunities
Is the
message
really
necessary?
Don’t
assume
immediate
response
Regularly
disconnect
from the
technology
Provide
social
interaction
opportunities