Eliminating Wordiness
Group ______
1.
Names ________________________________________________
After looking through the 2003 combined balance sheet, the report has me skeptical on your allegation of Paris
being in an excellent financial position.
a. The 2003 combined balance sheet questions your claim of Paris’s excellent health.
b. After reviewing your 2003 combined balance sheet, I question your claim that Paris is financially healthy.
2.
As you stated, Paris does have a healthy total fund balance, but it is also very important to look at the balances in
each individual fund when determining where a city stands financially.
a. As you stated, Paris’s total fund balance is healthy, but you should also look at individual fund balances when assessing
your city’s financial health.
b. As you stated, Paris is reasonably healthy, but you should look at the balances of individual funds to get a better financial
picture.
3.
To sum up the entire picture, the whole fund balance of $2,389 has been allocated or legally contracted to find a
certain event and there is still an extra $70 that the town of Paris owes.
a. Therefore, the fund balance of $2,389 has been allocated or legally contracted to find a certain event; however, Paris still
owes an additional $70.
b. Therefore, the balance of $2,389 has been allocated or legally contracted, but Paris still owes $70.
4.
The proprietary funds section is also very important to assess the financial picture of the town, because the amounts
of the funds of the business type activities are sometimes larger than those of governmental activities.
a. Consult proprietary funds to determine if business activities exceed the funds of governmental activities in determining
Paris’ financial health.
b. When assessing Paris’s health, you should evaluate proprietary funds. The fund balance in proprietary funds sometimes
is larger than the fund balance in governmental funds.
5.
When looking at the balances relative to one another, I see another problem, which is that the debt service fund also
has a fairly high balance.
a. When comparing the balances, I notice that the balance of the debt service fund is fairly high.
b. When comparing the balances, the debt service fund having a high balance is revealed.
6.
Failing to use the budgeted money for what it was intended to be used for is not healthy and should be re-examined
in order to successfully maintain a strong financial position.
a. Misusing budgeted funds is unhealthy, and this misuse should be re-examined for future assessments of Paris’s financial
health.
b. Failing to use budgeted funds for their intended purposes is unhealthy, and this failure should be re-examined in order to
maintain Paris’s strong financial position.
Problem #2: Misplaced Modifiers and Vague Pronoun Use
Group ______
Names ________________________________________________
Two other verbal roadbumps are misplaced modifiers (MM) and vague pronoun (VP) uses. Misplaced modifiers are
descriptive phrases that are followed by reference to someone or something other than what is described in the phrase. A
vague pronoun is one which is not clearly and unambiguously related to what has gone before.
You have several sentences below. Please decide whether they include wordiness (W), misplaced modifiers (MM) or vague
pronouns (VP). Also, please type your revised sentences and submit them along with this sheet.
1. ______After taking 386, it seemed apparent that I could look forward to a job in the accounting
profession.
2. ______The financial statement for a government and for a not-for-profit would need to show how
the various revenues are being spent and would need to categorize the various types and sources of
revenues and expenditures. This needs to be compared to the budget that would need to be included in
the financial report as well.
3. ______Unlike governments and not-for-profit organizations, the only reason that companies exist is
to generate profits.
4. _____ When addressing differences, the main point that comes to mind regarding corporations is
that they tend to have a heavy focus on, and are driven by, profits.
5. _____ This memo regards your concerns about Mr. Roger Doll’s proposal about how to reduce the
budgetary expenditure and increase revenue by adopting a number of adjustments toward various
accounts, and how these actions could influence your cash-basis or near-cash budget.
6. _____ To hold off on $10 million of maintenance will only cost you more in the year to follow.
This will reduce your maintenance expenses for one year, but will just be increased the next year to fix
the further damage caused by putting off these repairs.
7. _____ This action can reduce budgetary expenditures in the short-term but it can be misleading
because future spending will need to increase to make up for the shortfall. This might be more costly
in the future so I wouldn’t accept this action.
8. _____ If the action is taken, then the city will report a government fund expenditure of only $5
million. That implies a pension expense of $10 million and a liability of $5 million.
9. ______If they delay maintenance, the highways could fall apart at a much quicker rate and possibly
make travel dangerous.