MODULE 1
Introduction to Gracious Space
by the Center for Ethical Leadership, Seattle Wash.
Purpose
 To build a safe and supportive space in a group
 To define Gracious Space and help groups understand how to express each element
Materials
 Definition of Gracious Space
 Chart paper and markers
Background
Developing shared leadership for transformational and sustainable change requires a space
that can hold relationships and the work in all of its complexity. Groups need a supportive
structure that supports the time and environment to build trust, learn to work together in new
ways, develop shared purpose and plans and take action.
Leaders of the 21st century need the skills to create this supportive holding space for
the shared leadership, learning and action to emerge. At the Center for Ethical Leadership, we
call this creating Gracious Space. We define Gracious Space as: a spirit and setting where we
invite the stranger and learn in public.
Gracious Space is not a conflict-free space. As people work together in community, it is
inevitable that conflict will occur. People carry their past assumptions about others, different
world views can lead to friction, and solutions offered can trigger competition among group
members. It is important to have create a gracious space for conflicts to emerge and be
addressed productively.
People use many different terms to describe this type of holding environment. It is not
important what the community calls this space, but it is essential that the group intentionally
creates this supportive space and to know the key components essential to its creation.
Facilitation Instructions
To introduce Gracious Space to a group, we engage participants in a discovery process and a
description of the kind of environment and guidelines they would like to create for
their meeting or gathering. This exercise should take approximately 25 minutes.
1. Ask participants to consider Gracious Space individually. “Think of a time when you
Module One: Introduction to Gracious Space (c) Center for Ethical Leadership
1401 E Jefferson, Suite 505, Seattle, WA 98122
www.ethicalleadership.org * 206-328-3020
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have experienced Gracious Space -- whatever this means to you (and even before we share the
definition). What was the setting? What did you experience?”
2. Have participants get into pairs. “Find one other person in the group to talk to. For
the next five minutes share your stories with each other.” While the group is talking,
write the definition on chart paper: Gracious Space is a spirit and setting where we
invite the "stranger" and learn in public.
3. Gather the large group together. Ask participants to share some of the characteristics of
the Gracious Space they experienced in their stories. Write these characteristics on chart paper.
Discourage a retelling of the stories. Elicit descriptive words until the chart is full.
4. “These are all aspects of Gracious Space. Your stories and descriptions indicate you already
know a lot about the qualities of Gracious Space. The goal is to be able to create these qualities
in any gathering so that our work is well supported. I want to share the Center for Ethical
Leadership’s definition.” Read the definition out loud and emphasize the four different
elements. Briefly go over each element.
Spirit
"The spirit of Gracious means intentionally creating a supportive environment. How we show
up matters and can become infectious for better or worse. What do you do to prepare for a
difficult conversation or an uncomfortable new situation?” Share an example of how paying
attention to your own attitude can have a big impact on the situation.
"Spirit is also about the energy a group creates together. How group members relate to one
another, how the group interacts with others and how it gets work done create a shared spirit
of Gracious Space. Too often groups just get down to business and give little time or attention
to how it wants to be together. Do we simply want to push our solution to be adopted or do we
want to understand each other? Gracious Space seeks to create a supportive environment
where people develop their ideas together.”
Setting
"Gracious Space has a physical dimension that can support or impede our work together. The
space we use for meetings influences our ability to be productive. This is the setting - it is
simply the physical environment where the works takes place. Look around the room we are
gathered in. What about this setting supports the kind of interaction we want?” Listen to four
or five responses.
“When working on the setting it is important to ask the question, how can the setting
support the type of interaction we want to have? This requires us to look three aspects of
setting:
Module One: Introduction to Gracious Space (c) Center for Ethical Leadership
1401 E Jefferson, Suite 505, Seattle, WA 98122
www.ethicalleadership.org * 206-328-3020
2
•
Physical space. Do we need a retreat setting away from distractions? How
important is natural lighting, air and room to move around? What materials,
food, and other items should be included?
•
Time. How much time will we allocate? Is the time sufficient for the depth of
conversation we intend?
•
Format. What meeting structure best suits our goals? Do we want to sit in a large
circle to be able to see each other and interact? Do we want to be at round
tables to support small group discussion?"
Welcome the stranger
"Today’s world is complex and highly connected world, and relies on our interdependence to do
our best work. The term invite the “stranger” refers to actively seeking out any individual who,
or idea which, is not typically involved in the conversation but could add valuable perspective.
"You may notice the language itself - invite the stranger - is active and forward thinking, as
opposed to "tolerate difference." We want to welcome difference – of background,
experience, perspective, etc. The goal of inviting the stranger is to get smarter through shared
perspectives before making decisions or taking action."
Some questions that support inviting the "stranger" include:
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Who else needs to be included in this work?
Whose voice is not typically heard on this issue yet has value to add?
How will we prepare ourselves to be open to the "stranger's" perspective?
How can we prepare the "stranger" to feel comfortable in our midst?
What can we learn from the "stranger?"
Learn in public
"Learning in public means judging less, listening more, and being willing to change your mind.
Gracious Space asks us to engage in deep listening—with a commitment to learn. Learning in
public requires humility, a willingness to explore our assumptions, letting go of a “right way” of
doing things, changing our minds and opening our hearts. It also means showing up
authentically and being willing to express—in a respectful way—our own thoughts and feelings
that others need to hear to understand and learn from us."
Some questions that can help groups learn together:
Module One: Introduction to Gracious Space (c) Center for Ethical Leadership
1401 E Jefferson, Suite 505, Seattle, WA 98122
www.ethicalleadership.org * 206-328-3020
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
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How will you open up to learning?
What do you need to let go of – certainty, expertise, solutions, etc.—to open up?
How will you create space for the ideas, wisdom, and expertise of others to show up?”
5. After this introductory exploration of Gracious Space, the group should have a good grasp of
Gracious Space and the four elements. They can build from this understanding to creating
Gracious Space for the conversation they have gathered to have. Some questions that can be
used to create norms from Gracious Space include:
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What are the main aspects of Gracious Space we want to emphasize in our meetings
and time together?
How do we want to open our meetings so we are intentional about the four elements?
What is a good way to close our meetings?
Can we create this space here and now for our gathering?
Share the poem “Friendship.”
Oh, the comfort —
the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person —
having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words,
but pouring them all right out,
just as they are,
chaff and grain together;
certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them,
keep what is worth keeping,
and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away.
--Dinah M. Craik, from her short story, “A Life for a Life”
Reference: Hughes, Patricia. Gracious Space: a Practical Guide for Working Better Together,
Center for Ethical Leadership, Seattle, Wash., 2004.
Module One: Introduction to Gracious Space (c) Center for Ethical Leadership
1401 E Jefferson, Suite 505, Seattle, WA 98122
www.ethicalleadership.org * 206-328-3020
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