The observers we are: Leadership and the Enemies of Learning
By Charles Feltman, Insight Coaching (revised and edited by Kay Psencik)
Learning is changing behavior—seeing what we have never seen before, doing what we have never
done before, thinking what we have never thought before—and doing it well!
In all your coaching experiences, you will find in others and yourself the enemies of learning. Spend
time internalizing these distinctions. You know them personally! Begin to think about them when
they become barriers to the learning of those you coach.
One of the more interesting things about the current difficult economic environment has been
watching how different business leaders have reacted to it. Those who have done the best to secure
their companies’ interests, protect their market positions, and retain their best people, have in my
experience been those who immediately went into learning mode. Whether they look at the changes
as an opportunity to learn new strategies for success, or simply to learn how to survive in the new
environment, they have opened themselves and their organizations to learning. In doing so, they have
discovered new possibilities for themselves and their companies.
That bring up the question, what sets a learner apart from those who are successful in one
environment but cannot seem to find new actions that work in a different one? To answer that
question it is important first to differentiate learning from simply amassing data. Learning creates a
change in behavior, or at least the possibility for new behavior. It generates the potential to take new
or different actions in the world.
Learning to ride a bicycle, for example, means being able to get on one and ride it when you want to.
Before you couldn’t; after you can. The same is true for learning new or different behaviors and
actions in any other domain of life, including business leadership, family, artistic expression, and
community service. There are many areas in our lives in which we develop a certain resistance to
learning, and we go on performing actions that are ineffective. We consistently make the same
mistakes, adhere to the same patterns and face the same difficulties. In addition, we ignore the fact
that, although we may have learned, we might have done it in a much more effective way.
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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How good are we at learning? Can we say that we know how to design our own learning?
What do we do in areas of our life in which we realize that we are incompetent and do not
know what actions to undertake?
What do we do when we visualize a new action domain, until then ignored by us, and
realize its importance for our lives?
What do we do when time and again we find ourselves unable to act effectively in the same
domain (for example, our finances, our children, our relationships, areas of our work,
what we would like to do in our spare time, etc.) What do we do? Do we prepare to learn?
Do we simply withdraw and do nothing? Do we begin to blame ourselves for not knowing?
Do we characterize ourselves as “stupid,” as “clever,” etc.”
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We postulate that the learning to learn competence is one of the most fundamental skills in today’s
world. It is our most effective resource to deal with the phenomenon of change. This postulate is
valid not only for individuals. It is also applicable to organizations. As is frequently repeated, the
future will belong to those that know how to expand their learning continuously.
Learning opens us to new possibilities for action that may be more useful or appropriate for the
context we find ourselves in. This is especially important when we suddenly find ourselves in a
different context, such as a recession.
So, what makes it possible to learn new behaviors and actions quickly, or even to learn them at all?
To put it simply, learners have eliminated almost all of their personal enemies of learning, those
attitudes, emotions and behavior patterns that dull or even kill our ability to learn.
Here are a few key enemies of learning, as described by Julio Olalla, the noted coach, writer and
teacher, and founder of The Newfield Network:
Our inability to admit that we don’t know. We have learned the value of knowing and we devalue
not knowing. But in order to learn we have to allow ourselves to be confused to be able to say, “I
don’t know” without judging ourselves or others. “I don’t know” is the place where new learning
begins. When we say “I already know that” we are with only the assumptions we already have. Being
able to say “I don’t know” without judgment is one of the great advantages children have which
make them such fast learners. Olalla notes that “to be a child is to live in awe of the discovery of
domains of action whose existence we were not capable of even anticipating.”
Another powerful variation on this theme is the fear of admitting that we don’t know. When knowing
is so highly valued and not knowing devalued, I may assess that admitting I don’t know something
would cause others to devalue me. This can also prevent me from beginning the learning process.
Given the way I am, I cannot learn “that”!
People also turn their backs on learning when, on seeing the new as new, they tell themselves, “I will
never be able to learn this.” There may be different stories behind this phrase. Some may say, “I am
not clever enough to get to know this,” or “This is too complicated for me,” etc.
Lack of self-confidence is an enemy to learning. It is an emotional state in the sense in which
Humberto Maturana defines emotions: connoting a disposition, or a lack of disposition to action. To
persons in the emotional state of lack of self-confidence, learning is not a possible action domain.
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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Where have you said in your life, “I cannot learn “that”?
Where are you saying right now, “I cannot learn “that”?
How do these thoughts impact your self-confidence? What are the results for you?
How does lack of self-confidence affect our language? What impact does it have on our
emotions? Our body?
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The desire for clarity all of the time. A prevailing attitude of many in our culture is our wanting to
be clear about everything all of the time. The inability to admit that we don’t know deprives us of the
process of inquiry. In today’s fast paced world and instant information, we are having greater and
greater trouble with the intense need for clarity and the total frustration with living on the plateau of
confusion and inquiry until we find new and more effective solutions.
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
 What emotions do you experience when things are not clear to you?
 What strategies do you engage in when you lack clarify?
 What frustrations do you experience?
 Do you or do you not allow yourself to stay in confusion and inquiry for some time? If not,
why? If so, how?
Lack of priority for learning – “I don’t have time.” One of the things we tell ourselves far too
often in our super-fast-paced environment is, “The world is moving too fast and I don’t have time to
learn.” We fail to consider that this is a problem of assigning priorities—if we did we’d have to
acknowledge our own responsibility. Learning must be a priority or it won’t happen. The irony of a
life that is so packed with doing that there is no time for learning is that little of value may ever
actually get done. When what we are doing isn’t working, simply doing the same things faster won’t
get us what we need and want. It is time to take time to learn new actions.
Two very marked social tendencies of today are at the root of this powerful obstacle: one is
“workaholism” and the high social prestige that being very busy entails. The other is the addition to
“entertainment.” Needless to say the impact of technology on this tendency has been great. It goes
without saying that our culture does not consider learning activities as fun, but rather as obligations
to which we submit ourselves when the external forces are very strong.
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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How do you view learning? What is learning to you?
How does learning energize you?
How does this obstacle to learning impact you? What shifts do you need to make in your
life to make learning a priority?
Inability to unlearn. We assume that if it worked well before it should work well again. This is
rarely so. For years I learned to play tennis on my own. I had really good friends, who just like me,
wanted to just go out and volley. The exercise to us came in the running. Of course, we loved a
good swing, and were proud when our backswing actually got the ball in the court, but we did not
even keep score. One year, I decided that I really ought to take tennis lessons. According to my
teacher, I had done rather well on my own, but he was very helpful and made me practice, practice,
practice. One habit I still have not broken was staying at the baseline. I just never played at the net;
I never moved toward the net. One day he told me, you will never be really good at tennis until you
can unlearn your habit of hanging out in the back court!
Just like my very bad habit, we confront new situations by simply repeating old actions over and
over again, frustrated that they don’t work.
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In reality, according to our recent research on the brain, we really do not every unlearn. Our
challenge is to build new neuron networks over the “Grand Canyons” we have built with practiced
old learnings sufficiently strong so that the new learning prevails. (Thus the concept of 10,000
hours!)
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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What have you unlearned in your life? How did you go about doing it?
What do you need to unlearn now? What do you need to do to learn new strategies?
What challenges will you face? How will you overcome them?
Ignoring the emotional dimension of learning. Learning requires creation of the appropriate
emotional field or context—one of respect and caring. Learning requires an opening to the new and a
disposition to question what we already know. Since we are constantly trying to make sense of our
lives and the world around us, we often construct a coherence, which may breed assertiveness and
assertiveness breeds blindness. This blindness takes the emotional form that we identify with the
word “arrogance.” Arrogance is an emotion that may be linguistically reconstructed as follows: “I
know everything there is to be known and nothing around me represents the opportunity for me to
learn something new.”
This blindness may also breed a lack of observing ourselves as we are. I have a friend I have been
coaching for some time. She applied for a challenging job in her own district. For some time, I had
been truly coaching her on the roles she played in staff meetings. “How did the principals observer
your work today? What observations did you make about yourself in relationship to your work with
the principals? I have for some time observed this strong, intelligent, leaderly person take on all the
tasks of running the computer, taping up the papers, arranging the food, clearing and cleaning tables.
While she was busy with these chores, her two partners were visiting with teams of principals, asking
questions of some of their comments, making sweeping observations to the whole group from time to
time. I have not been successful. Her comments have always been, “But, Kay, we do not have
anyone to do this work. We have two executive secretaries that cannot type a thank you letter or
produce a spread sheet!”
She called distraught! “I did not get the job I so wanted. My superintendent said it was because I did
not have the skills she wanted on her cabinet to truly lead principals. I am really reflecting on all of
the coaching you have been doing with me; I want to talk about not your observations anymore, but
mine.” Now she is emotionally ready for learning.
Learning also requires courage and trust. We have to say, “Trying and failing is a part of my
learning! I must go forward, take the leap, trust myself and others to give me feedback that will open
new observations for me.”
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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What is truly your emotional disposition that allows you to see new ways and take new
actions?
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Ignoring the body as a dimension of learning. In order to attain the level of transparency that
accompanies the higher levels of competence, learning embraces the body. We need to have a body
that can house a new interpretation or perform a new action. New learning changes the body’s
physiology. Depending on what we learn, it may create changes in the neural structure of the brain,
the electrochemistry of our nervous systems, even the shape of the body. Whatever we do we do it
with the body. The ability to learn requires the ability to open our bodies to change.
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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What in the world does this mean?
What examples can we generate of how we need a body that can hose a new interpretation,
perform a new action, think a new way?
How do you view learning?
Confusing learning with acquiring information. Far too often today we confound having lots of
data with learning—if we “know” some new bit of information we consider that we have learned
something. Yet simply possessing information doesn’t give us a clue as to how to use it effectively. If
we only have one or two possible interpretations for the data, neither of which seem to get us where
we want to go, we will have to learn a new interpretation. Learning has to do with effective action.
Having information is a critical element of learning. However, if such information is not translated
into new actions, it means that information is nothing but the mere ability to repeat certain assertions
and nothing more. An important element of knowledge is the ability to assess the information,
evaluate it in different contexts and domains and use it effectively to achieve challenging goals for
ourselves and others—to change behavior.
Coaching is no different. We will not become effective coaches by conceptually understanding what
we are learning. We will become effective coaches as we practice these ideas and concepts, use the
distinctions we are learning, and reflect continuously on our skills.
Joyce and Shower’s Research of Profession Learning
% of participants who will transfer new
learning into practice
Professional learning approach
5%
Sharing theory
10%
Sharing theory and seeing it demonstrated
20%
Sharing theory, demonstration, and practice
25%
Sharing theory, demonstration, practice with
feedback
90%
Sharing theory, demonstration, practice with
feedback, and job embedded coaching
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Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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How have you confused learning with acquiring information?
How has professional development confused learning with acquiring information?
Not giving permission to others to teach us. When we declare someone to be our teacher we invest
them with trust and authority. We recognize that they are more effective in a particular domain of
action than we are and we declare that we want to be more effective in that domain than we currently
are. When we do not give a teacher permission to teach us, we rob ourselves of the opportunity to
learn. There are many ways in which we deny this permission. We may fear admitting to a potential
teacher that we don’t know. Conversely, we may believe that we know as much as—or more than—
he or she does. We may believe we can—or should—learn whatever it is by ourselves. We may
believe we are incapable of being taught. All of these attitudes and assessments deny us the
opportunity to learn from others.
Lack of trust. To learn is to introduce oneself to the unknown, into an action domain which in we
accept not knowing. The only way we can get to our destination is to trust our teachers and allow
them to guide us. Distrust derails the process. Yet blindly trusting someone to teach us can be folly.
What is required is trust with prudence. We reserve the option to withdraw our trust at any point
during the process. We continually offer the teacher the opportunity to demonstrate that he or she
worthy of our trust.
Some people are reluctant to invest authority and trust in those from whom they want to learn. In a
way, although they admit their ignorance, they seem to believe that they know what they should do to
learn. They are permanently questioning the teacher’s instruction, as if they know better.
Either, we honestly admit that we do not know and are willing to submit ourselves to somebody
else’s teaching, or we do know and there is no need to learn.
Spend time alone, make notes in your journal, and then with your partner discussing the following
questions:
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When have you failed to learn because you failed to give another permission to teach you?
What was the cost to you?
Did or does this person know what I want to learn? What grounding do I have?
Does this person know how to teach what they know? What groundings do I have?
Is this person’s commitment to teach me sincere?
Is this person reliable?
Does this person have a good track record of fulfilling such promises?
As a leader, no matter what level you are leading at, from project team leader to CEO, or what
domain you are leading in—business, family, community—the ability to learn quickly is critical to
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effective action in a changing environment. One constant in our world is change: technology itself is
evolving at breakneck speed and it is changing how we live our lives almost as quickly; economic
conditions are in flux; the political and economic relationships between peoples and countries are
shifting continuously. Those who are best able to expand their possibilities for effective action
through learning will be the successful leaders of our businesses, our communities, and our
governments.
In summary:
 As a leader in your business, your community, in your family, in your personal life, what
are your enemies of learning?
 What have they cost you? What suffering have they brought about?
 How can you evade or defeat them in your life?
 What would you like to learn or unlearn in order to increase your effectiveness in action
and your personal well-being?
 Do you find it difficult admitting to yourself or others that you don’t know something?
 Do you fail to prioritize for learning and give it enough time in your busy schedule?
 Do you rigidly hold on to actions that have worked in the past, even though they clearly
aren’t working now?
 Do you refuse others permission to teach you? If so, what would you want to change about
yourself that would open you up to learning from others more effectively?
We do not know how things are; we only know how we observe them.” Humberto Maturana
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