2008 Excellence Exemplar – 90055 1.4
Topic number 2.
Describe at least ONE technique that helped make the writer’s idea(s) clear to you in
EACH text.
Explain why the technique(s) made the idea(s) clear to you in EACH text.
Note: “Techniques” might be language, style, structure or narrative point-of-view.
In the poem My Father Began as a God by Ian Mudie, an important idea is how age and
experience can change one’s perception. Techniques Mudie used to make his idea clear
were structure, imagery, allusions and diction. In the poem On Turning Ten by Billy
Collins, the important idea of loss of innocence is made clear through the use of imagery
and symbolism.
In My Father Began as a God, structure was used to represent the persona’s different
stages in life. From childhood to adolescence and then adulthood, to when the persona’s
father was buried. In the first stanza, the persona saw his father as omnipotent, “My
father began as a God”. He looked up to his father and his “heroic tales”. His father had
given a mythical perception of his own childhood to his son. Through the use of biblical
allusions, it is shown that he thought of his father as “immutable” and his rules were as if
“brought down from Sinai”. This emphasises the importance of the father to the boy, as
the persona always obeyed his father’s rules.
The idea of the father’s significance, is further developed in the second stanza. His
father’s presence makes him feel special like a “godling … lifted into heaven” and makes
him feel as if he is capable of doing anything “…placed on the milch cow… and the great
white gobbler”. These images emphasise how big and strong the persona of his father
is.
However, in the third stanza, as the persona hits adolescence, he now thinks of his
father as a “foolish, small old man”. The diction used suggests the persona now thinks
his father is inferior. The father has diminished in size and importance. Those once
important rules now seem “silly and outmoded”. This shows clearly the change in
perception of his father once the narrator has gotten older.
The repetition of “strange … stranger…strangest” emphasises the epiphany of the son
about his father. As he grows older and has gained more experience, he starts to see his
father’s virtues of “honesty, generosity, integrity” again. He begins to realise how
insignificant he is compared to his father as he is “not knee-high to this long dead God”.
The persona’s change in perception again once he has gained more experience made
the idea clear to the reader. The unity within the poem is linked from the last stanza to
the first as the persona’s final view of his father is the same as his initial perception. This
not only shows to the reader that the persona’s perception has changed but also his
perception of himself as he has gained both experience and age.
In the poem On Turning Ten, imagery and symbolism are used to clearly show the
reader the main idea of loss of innocence. At the beginning of the poem, it is clear to the
reader that the persona doesn’t want to become older. He feels as if he is “coming down
with something”. Turning ten, like illness, is something that the persona does not want;
“measles of the spirit… mumps of the psyche… disfiguring chicken pox of the soul” all
give images of disturbance in the skin and signify that the perfect skin, like innocence is
destroyed. The persona is made worldly by the image of him “roaming the universe in
my sneakers”. The persona suggests that with age and experience, people forget what
innocence was like: “you have forgotten… the perfect simplicity of one… I can lie in my
bed and remember every digit”.
The persona now seems like an observer in life as he watches “the late afternoon sun”
which symbolises his stage in life. His spirit of adventure is also put to rest as his bicycle
“leans against the garage”. The garage symbolises a place where things are stored
away and forgotten, so gradually, the persona’s innocence and spirit for adventure will
be forgotten. The image of “the dark blue speed drained out of my bicycle” also
emphasises this.
With the loss of innocence and the gaining of experience, people are more aware of the
dangers, the consequences of things in life. Ignorance is bliss. Before, if the persona
“cut myself… I shine.. but now I bleed”. Once experience is gained, people are more
easily hurt. Collins uses delicate metaphors such as “…I was an Arabia wizard. I could
make myself invisible by drinking a glass of milk a certain way. I was a prince.” These
are memories of one’s childhood solely through imagination. Once experience is gained,
childish imagination also ebbs away. Collins uses these metaphors to allow the reader to
think back to their own childhoods and allow them to clearly realise how much they have
forgotten what it is like.
However, the persona over estimates his own loss of innocence: “measles… mumps…
chicken pox” are all illnesses which commonly appear in one’s childhood which suggest
the persona’s youth. Also, words such as “sneakers” and “treehouse” also emphasise
how young the persona really is.
In the poems My Father Began as a God and On Turning Ten the poets effectively use
poetic techniques to make it clear to the reader that as one grows older, they gain
experience and lose their childhood innocence. Due to this, one’s perception of things
will also change accordingly.
Suggestions:
Vary the use of persona with synonyms such as ‘narrator’ ‘main character’ ?
Clothe the ‘naked’ quotation by following it with a closing comment.