Family fumes at dad who helps himself to best parts of buffet

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Dear Abby
Heloise
The wiper, not
the windshield
Dear Heloise: My windshield has been streaky for a
while, and I assumed I just
needed to wash my car. My
father told me I needed to
replace my windshield-wiper
blades. He was right! Still
learning from Dad. — No
Name, No Shame, via email
Your father was right!
Wiper blades work best for
about six months to a year,
depending on several variables. Even if your car sits in
the driveway and isn’t driven,
exposure to heat, sunlight,
weather and dirt can cause
wipers to harden, crack or
tear. Ruined wipers can leave
a windshield streaked, which
is a BIG safety hazard, especially in bad weather.
Check them for tears. Just
lift the wiper a little and run
your finger along the edge to
feel for nicks, tears, etc. To
extend the life of your wipers,
clean them during your checks
using a clean cloth (microfiber
is my favorite) that you wet
with window cleaner, then
rinse with water. — Heloise
Cake flour
Dear Heloise: I have a new
recipe that calls for cake flour.
All I can find in the market is
all-purpose and self-rising
flours. Any suggestions on
what I can use to make cake
flour? — Lillian H., Joplin,
Mo.
Absolutely! Here is an easy
recipe for cake flour: Take 1
cup of all-purpose flour.
Remove 2 tablespoons of the
flour and add 2 tablespoons of
cornstarch. Mix together
using a whisk or a fork. Now,
simply use as directed in your
recipe! — Heloise
Canned goods
Dear Heloise: Recently, you
had a letter about someone
who opened cans of beans
from the bottom to make it
easier to get all the beans out.
Instead, I put all of my
canned goods on the shelves
upside down. It is still easy to
read the labels, and it eliminates digging the product out
of the bottom of the can. It
also keeps the top of the can
much cleaner.
When I pick up a can, I
automatically turn it right
side up before I open it, and
some cans can be opened only
from the top. I run a dishcloth
around the rim to clean it, but
there is never any accumulated dust down in the crevices.
— Wally G. in Ohio
Storing shortening
Dear Readers: Where do
you keep a can of vegetable
shortening — in the refrigerator or in the pantry? You can
keep it in either place, but it is
recommended by major manufacturers to store it in the
pantry.
If it is very hot where you
live and the pantry is warm,
you may prefer to store it in
the refrigerator. Just remember to let it warm to room
temperature before using it. —
Heloise
Spoon rest
Dear Heloise: Since this is
the age of the mug, saucers
are not used very much. I use
my saucers as spoon rests.
The recessed area is perfect
for the spoon, and after using
one, I just put it in the dishwasher, and it is ready for the
next time. Thank you for your
great work on behalf of modern-day people looking for new
ideas. — Debbie Y. in Texas
Priceless gifts
Dear Heloise: I have six
grown children and many
grandchildren and greatgrandchildren. Consequently, I
have received many gifts in
my lifetime.
However, the greatest gift I
have ever received is probably
the least-expensive one of all. I
received a fairly large jar with
a lid on it and a hand-written
label stuck on the front, titled
“Mom’s Memories.” My children write notes and secretly
slide them in the jar anytime
they visit. The notes are things
they remember about growing
up, things that were instrumental in their lives. Really
heartwarming! — F.M.G. in
Arkansas
A heart hint that sings and
lifts your spirits! Love it! —
Heloise
Horoscope
by Bernice Bede Osol
In the year ahead, you
should be able to make a
major change in a project,
effectively turning it into two
separate endeavors. Both will
do well, thanks to your innovative ideas.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20)
— Two interrelated projects
might have a good potential
for profit if they’re handled in
tandem. Try to see the big picture, and act accordingly.
CANCER (June 21-July 22)
— A clever friend might discuss a new idea. If you believe
it to be a good one and there’s
room for you to share in it, do
so.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) —
We all have varied roles to
play in life. You’ve been a
giver for a while — now it’s
time to start receiving.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
— If you take an old venture
apart, you should be able to
discover new ways to make it
profitable. Don’t be afraid to
get a little messy.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) —
Your many accomplishments
will not only be for yourself,
but for the benefit of others.
Your efforts will bear much
fruit.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22)
— Usually, what we know is
more significant than who we
know. However, when it comes
to the present cycle, your
social contacts will be of vital
importance.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23Dec. 21) — A casual acquaintance might ask for help sorting out a problem. Don’t hesitate to ask for a fee if it falls in
your occupational domain.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan.
19) — An alliance has an
excellent chance of being successful. You’re instincts will
tell you who will be productive
and who won’t.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb.
19) — You’re presently in a
cycle where good things could
come without much effort.
Reap the benefits, but don’t
take anything for granted.
PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20)
— It isn’t likely you will feel
comfortable if you’re allowed
to play only a minor role in a
big project. You belong up
front, calling the shots. Find a
way to get there.
ARIES (March 21-April 19)
— Your ability to capably balance several endeavors at the
same time gives you an edge
over the competition. Don’t
waste it.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20)
— It can be unwise to change
your mind at the last minute,
but there are plenty of times
when it’s necessary. Today,
you might need to call an audible for a good reason.
Family fumes at dad who helps
himself to best parts of buffet
by Abigail Van Buren
DEAR ABBY: I host all of
the holiday parties and dinner
parties for my family. Whenever I have my parents over,
my father insists on helping
himself to the top layer of
every casserole. He’ll scrape
all the cheese off the potatoes,
the crunchy onion topping off
the green bean casserole, etc.,
leaving just the bare vegetables for everyone else.
I have asked Dad not to do
it because it is inconsiderate
of the other guests. I can see
people are bothered by it, so
now they make a beeline to the
buffet so they can beat him to
it.
Dad got offended when I
talked to him about it, but he
continues to do so. Mom refuses to get involved, and I have
said all I can say. What to do?
— BURNED UP IN ILLINOIS
DEAR BURNED UP: A
guest who grabs all the goodies at a dinner party is a hog.
Because your father refuses to
change his behavior, I will
offer a few suggestions: The
first is to alter your menu to
avoid serving casserole dishes.
If that’s not possible, make
your father his own separate
casserole with his name on it,
so he can have it all to himself.
Or plate the food in the kitchen
and stop serving it buffetstyle.
DEAR ABBY: Over the
past few years, as social
media has become more popular, I have noticed a trend
among many people. They now
favor that form of communication over personal human
interaction. This is especially
true of my girlfriend of five
years.
We have the normal relationship problems I feel could
be addressed, but from the
moment she gets home from
work she’s in front of the computer
playing
Facebook
games, posting status updates
or messaging “friends.” She
sits there for hours, lost in her
virtual world. We rarely talk
anymore, and when we do it
turns into an argument
because I’m trying to discuss
what I see as a serious problem.
The Internet and social
media are great tools for bringing worlds together, if they are
not abused. But for many people, I think, social media is
doing more harm than good. It
has depersonalized human contact and has the potential to
destroy relationships and isolate individuals.
I’m interested in your opinion and any advice you can
give me on helping my girlfriend understand my concerns. — ALONE IN THE
REAL WORLD
DEAR ALONE: People
cannot be two places at once.
When relationships aren’t nurtured, they wither. If this has
been going on for an extended
period, then it’s time you give
your girlfriend a wake-up call:
You feel abandoned. By spending more time in the virtual
world than in the real one, she
is neglecting her relationship
with you.
Ask her if she would be willing to work on a compromise
so that she spends time with
you. If she can’t do that, and
the Internet is giving her
everything she needs, then you
should find a lady who is willing to give you more of what
YOU need, which is undivided
attention.
DEAR ABBY: If a person
compliments me on my hair,
am I obliged to reveal that it
isn’t my natural color? I am a
henna redhead, and it looks
very natural, but my friend
who is a natural redhead says
I have to fess up. She will even
tell people “for me” that my
color is “fake.” What should I
do? — HENNA REDHEAD IN
NEW YORK
DEAR
HENNA
REDHEAD: Start spending more
time
with
blondes
and
brunettes than with a redhead
who doesn’t know when to keep
her mouth shut. She is jealous
of the attention you’re getting.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van
Buren, also known as Jeanne
Phillips, and was founded by her
mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear
Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O.
Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA
90069.
Dr. Roach
Help needed for erythromelalgia
by Keith Roach, M.D.
DEAR DR. ROACH: My
sister has been diagnosed with
erythromelalgia. Is there a
cure? Or just pain management? She has seen her PCP, a
neurologist and now sees a
pain-management clinic. She
is taking oxycodone and has
had several “blocks.” She is in
so much pain. Please advise.
— V.M.
ANSWER: Erythromelalgia (“erythro” is “red,” “melo”
is “extremity” and “algia” is
“pain”) is a rare disorder of
peripheral nerves, which
directly causes pain and
which also affects the blood
vessels in the skin, causing the
characteristic red coloring
and warmth. It usually occurs
in the feet, but it can occur in
the hands, face or other parts
of the body. It may occur by
itself or as a result of other
conditions, such as autoimmune diseases or blood disorders like chronic myelogenous
leukemia. Some medications
also are associated with this
disease. The pain varies
among different people, but it
can be disabling.
Flares of erythromelalgia
often are caused by warmth or
exercise, although exercise
that keeps the affected body
part cool, such as swimming,
may be helpful. Ice or other
cooling can be dangerous,
however.
Making the diagnosis is difficult, and many people with
this condition have seen spe-
cialists or have been misdiagnosed. Although there is no
cure for erythromelalgia,
there are several different
treatments, and sometimes it
takes multiple tries to find one
medicine — or, more likely, a
combination of medicines —
that helps.
I found a very useful website
at www.erythromelalgia.org.
Dr. Roach regrets that he is unable
to answer individual letters, but will
incorporate them in the column
whenever possible. Readers may
email questions to ToYourGoodHealth@med.cornell.edu
or
request an order form of available
health newsletters at P.O. Box
536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475.
Health newsletters may be ordered
from www.rbmamall.com.
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