SFL/METU
DBE
Elementary Group
Writing Handout IX
November, 2007
GATEWAYS TO PARAGRAPH STRUCTURE
UNITY & COHERENCE: Two Important Elements of a Good Paragraph
Unity
In addition to a clear topic sentence and adequate support, a good paragraph must have unity. A paragraph
has unity when all of the supporting sentences relate to the main topic and develop the controlling idea.
In order to achieve unity, you must make sure that you do not include any information that is not relevant to
the main point stated in the topic sentence. Any sentences that do not support the topic are considered
irrelevant and should be eliminated.
Task 1. Each paragraph below has two irrelevant sentences. Find them and write the numbers of the
sentences in the blanks provided.
1. (1)Teachers can take several steps to prevent students from cheating on exams. (2)To begin with, they
can stop reusing old tests. (3)Students always check with their friends to find out what was on an exam
the previous year. (4)Therefore, they may know the questions and the answers before the exam.
(5)Another step that teachers can take is to make students sit separately during an exam.(6)By placing
students with one seat between them, the teacher can easily prevent cheating. (7)Students are sometimes
allowed to use electronic dictionaries in exams. (8)In addition, teachers can sit in the back of the room,
where they can clearly see what each student is doing. (9)By seeing each student, they may be able to
warn the students who attempt to cheat. (10)Finally, teachers can penalize the students who are involved
in cheating. (11)One of the problems with our school systems is the lack of discipline. (12)Any student
who is caught cheating can immediately be given a zero for the exam.
______ and ______ are irrelevant sentences.
2. (1) Mexico City is a popular place with tourists. (2) Every year thousands of tourists go to Mexico City.
(3) In 1970, the city had about 9 million people but now, it has over 17 million (4) They visit the old and
beautiful buildings. (5) In Mexico City's museums, they learn about the history of Mexico. (6) The
Mexican government is working hard to make life better in the city.
______ and ______ are irrelevant sentences.
3. (1) In the United States, drinking water comes from a few different places. (2) Many American cities and
towns have water problems. (3) Many cities get their drinking water from special lakes called reservoirs.
(4) Other cities get their water from lakes and rivers. (5) In some areas, people get their water from the
mountains. (6) They think that soon there may be no more clean drinking water. (7) In other areas,
people dig deep holes in the ground for water.
______ and ______ are irrelevant sentences.
5. (1) METU is one of the best universities in Turkey because of the high quality of education that it offers
and the many facilities available on the campus. (2) Every year, thousands of students apply to METU
but only a small percentage of these students are accepted. (3) METU owes its high quality education to
the teaching staff and the technology that it uses in education. (4) Most of the teaching staff are well
educated and follow the latest research. (5)The university has several computer labs where the students
can access lots of information. (6) METU has several facilities that the students can use free of charge.
(7) A few examples of these are tennis courts, a sports center, and a library. (8) Tennis is becoming more
and more popular among the students studying at METU. (9) To summarize, the high quality education
and the facilities available make METU the dream of many students preparing for the University
Entrance Exam.
______ and ______ are irrelevant sentences
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Coherence
By now you should realize that an effective paragraph needs a clear topic, adequate support, and unity.
One more component of a good paragraph is coherence. In a coherent paragraph, the sentences are
arranged so that the ideas are in a logical order. In order to achieve coherence, you need:
1. A clear plan of arrangement
2. Repetition of key words through pronouns
3. Transitions to connect your ideas
1. Arrangement
There are several standard ways to arrange your information so that your writing will be coherent. Three
of the most basic ways are time order, spatial order, and order of importance.
The way you choose to arrange your information depends on the kind of paragraph you are writing. If
you are explaining a sequence of events or telling a story, the logical arrangement of ideas and
sentences will be chronological, that is, according to time order. If you are describing the way
something looks or its physical characteristics, you will arrange your details according to the position
of the objects being described or where they are located. In this case you will use spatial order. Finally,
if you are listing examples, causes, effects, reasons, or purposes, you will probably use order of importance. In this type of paragraph, you either begin with the least important item and end with the most
important one, or vice versa.
2. Repetition of key words through pronouns.
A good paragraph has links which help to tie it together. One of the commonest is that repeated words
become pronouns. You studied this kind of link in the first span, Writing Handout II (Referencing).
e.g. There is a lot of gold in sea water. Scientists, inventors, and swindlers have tried to make their
fortune from it. Only the swindlers…
Note: When there may be misunderstandings or when the repeated noun comes a long way after it is
first mentioned, the full noun is used. Look at this example:
After the cream is separated from the milk, it is made into butter.
This sentence is confusing because it could refer to either cream or milk. Therefore you would change
it to the full noun, the cream.
3. Transitions
Transitions are signals that show the connection between one idea and the next. They are important
because they guide the reader through a paragraph. The following lists give some common transitions
that will help make your paragraphs more coherent. There are many transition words and phrases in
English that are used to connect sentences together or relate ideas to one another. You will learn these
transitions as you study different types of paragraphs in the second semester.
Usage
TRANSITION SIGNALS
To list ideas in time order or order First, (second, etc.)
of importance
First of all, / To begin with,
Then, / Next, / Finally,
To add another idea
Furthermore,
Besides,
Also,
In addition,
Moreover,
To express contrast
However,
On the other hand,
To add a similar idea
Similarly,
Likewise,
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To give an example
For example,
To illustrate,
For instance,
Such as
Therefore,
As a result,
Thus,
Consequently,
In conclusion,
In summary,
In brief,
In short,
That is,
In other words,
To give an effect (or result)
To add a conclusion
To signal paraphrasing
Task 2. Complete the sentences with a suitable transition signal from the box.
however
for example
1.
as a result
although
because
such as
in other words
also
that is
moreover
___________________ it's greatly admired by many people, modern art is generally not as popular
as more traditional forms.
2.
Bill doesn't like eating spicy food. ___________________ , he was really miserable when he
recently had to spend two weeks in India on a business trip.
3.
A new bypass has been constructed round our town. ___________________, the center is still as
congested as ever.
4.
___________________ the measuring instruments were defective, the experiment was a failure.
5.
The forest contributes substantially to the satisfaction of human needs; ___________________, it
performs a valuable service in holding soil in place.
6.
Many young people in my neighborhood waste their time playing computer games.
___________________, my neighbor's son plays such games virtually all night, which means he
doesn’t study at all.
7.
Bulbs are ideal for new gardeners as they are easy to plant and flower well in their first season.
They___________________ require comparatively little attention and grow happily in all types of soil.
8.
Careful readers interpret what they read; ___________________, they try to explain and understand
ideas brought out by the reading.
9.
Some people argue that certain relaxation techniques, ___________________ yoga and meditation, are
extremely effective in the treatment of high blood pressure.
10.
The painting for which they had paid a lot of money turned out to be a forgery;
___________________, it was not original.
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Task 3. Rewrite each sentence, choosing the correct transition signal from the parentheses and adding
the correct punctuation.
e.g. Living alone can be difficult. Many single people prefer to live with their families.
(however, therefore)
Living alone can be difficult. Therefore, many single people prefer to live with their families.
1. The value of the dollar has gone down. The financial markets are worried about the situation.
(consequently, moreover)
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
2. The crisis could seriously affect the prices of certain products. It could lead to a shortage of these goods.
(however, besides)
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
3. French and American business managers have a different understanding of meetings. The Americans
make an effort to start and end the meetings on time, while the French do not keep to strict timetables.
(for example, in addition)
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
4. Young people, especially women who are aware of the importance of health and fitness, are eating
Western-style breakfasts. They have fruit, milk and cereals for breakfast. (that is, similarly)
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
5. Studies show that eating fast food is dangerous for health. Millions of people continue to eat at such
places as Mac Donald’s and Burger King. (likewise, however)
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
6. There have been fewer factory orders. Many employees are fearful of losing their jobs. (thus, similarly)
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
Task 4. Complete each paragraph with transition signals from the box given. Use each transition
signal only once. There are more items than you need.
however
furthermore
that is
for instance
in conclusion
therefore
In the minds of many people, the octopus is considered a dangerous and unpleasant animal;
(1)_______________ , for me this strange creature is very interesting because of its extraordinary powers.
(2)_______________, the octopus has excellent, humanlike eyesight. The orange-brown eyes are mobile;
(3)_______________, they can be turned in different directions, which helps the animal to spot and avoid its
enemy. (4)_______________, the octopus has a surprising ability to change colour. The chromatophores, the
colour cells, enable the octopus to change colour. These exceptional powers make this animal an amazing
sea creature.
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moreover
because
in other words
therefore
however
also
likewise
There are two extremes of drivers behind the steering wheel today. On the one hand, there is the unsafe
driver, who disregards traffic regulations and makes life difficult for pedestrians and other drivers. Firstly,
he honks his horn or blinks his lights unnecessarily. He is (5)_______________ inconsiderate; he
takes up two parking places and slows down or speeds up simply in order to annoy other drivers.
(6)_______________, he is reckless; (7)_______________, he takes risks which may lead to accidents.
On the other hand, there is the safe driver. He obeys traffic regulations and practices courtesy on the road. He
never takes chances. He is careful and alert. (8) _______________, he is able to prevent a dangerous
situation from turning into a bad accident. (9)_______________, the safe driver is just as likely to have
accidents as the unsafe driver (10)_______________ both have to use the same roads. In fact, recent
statistical data show that the number of safe drivers involved in accidents is no smaller than that of unsafe
drivers.
therefore
that is
to illustrate
in addition
however
in conclusion
Doctors are warning the public to learn more about the effects of the Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI), which is usually
experienced by people who hit their heads. (11) _____________, a boy who falls off his bicycle and hits his head on
the ground may experience such an injury. In a serious brain injury, firstly, the person may become unconscious for
some time after the trauma. The unconsciousness may sometimes last for days. Secondly, the individual may
experience amnesia; (12) _____________, loss of memory. He may not remember the injury and the time
immediately before it. (13) _____________, he may have difficulty in remembering personal information like his
name or family. The consequences of TBI create medical, behavioral, social, and financial impacts on almost
everyone who experiences such an injury. (14)_____________, learning as much as possible about the consequences
and the challenges of brain injury is essential for coping with the condition.
Task 5. Mark the choice that best completes the following sentence.
1. There is a lot of carbon monoxide in the air where there is a lot of traffic. Since carbon
monoxide prevents red blood cells from carrying oxygen all over the body, _________.
a) most people try to avoid driving during rush hours in order not to get stuck in the traffic
b) governments have to introduce new laws in order to prevent air pollution
c) people in traffic jams may get headaches or feel dizzy
d) the exhaust fumes that cars emit are one of the main causes of air pollution in big cities
2. The use of laser beams for a variety of purposes is growing constantly. For instance, _________.
a) the use of laser in medicine is still distrusted by a great majority of doctors
b) surgeons perform delicate operations by means of laser beams and military scientists
use them for defense
c) today laser technology is still in its elementary and theoretical stage
d) as laser can help solve many problems, scientists call it a 'life-saving' device
3. Although less than half of the delegates attended the afternoon session, _________.
a) the discussion lasted longer than usual
b) the session had be cancelled
c) they were planning to discuss the new economic policies
d) other delegates were not informed about the session
4. Heavy rain has been forecast for the area. Therefore, _________.
a) the area is so arid that it is not possible to grow crops there
b) there has been heavy rain during the last few weeks
c) farmers know how to cope with the changes in weather conditions
d) authorities have to take all necessary precautions to avoid flooding
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5. In many countries, the government uses lotteries and football pools as an alternative means of collecting
taxes, but in some it does not because_________.
a) people hate paying taxes and this is a good way of getting money
b) its members believe that they should not encourage gambling
c) football is the most popular sport in many countries
d) lotteries are fair as everyone has an equal chance of winning
6. In many countries, education for young children is free. That is, _________.
a) a lot of people do not have the opportunity to go to college
b) children are required to attend primary school and secondary school
c) the government provides education for children without charging money
d) in two-year colleges, tuition is about three times cheaper than it is at larger universities
7. An animal or a plant may change color depending on its surroundings so that its enemies
cannot find it easily. For instance, _________.
a) the fur of some animals in northern countries turn white in winter to blend with the
snow
b) wild animals cannot survive in nature unless they develop certain techniques to
protect themselves from their enemies
c) certain kinds of plants can produce beautiful pink or red flowers even on the coldest
days of the year
d) people took the idea of camouflage from nature's protective coloration of plants and
animals
8. With one third of the world's tourist trade, the Mediterranean is the most popular of all
the holiday areas; yet it is also the most polluted. As a result, _________.
a) tourists are still interested in the great civilization of the past
b) the tourist industry in the area is in great danger
c) tourist agencies have changed their economic policies
d) governments have to provide financial support for the construction of new hotels
9. Some societies deny women's basic equality in politics, education and employment. For instance,
_________.
a) in the United States, 90% of elementary school teachers are women
b) in the late 1960's, women's organizations demanded an end to sex discrimination
c) today, there are a number of laws that protect the rights of women
d) in Liechtenstein, a small country in Europe, women still do not have the right to vote
10. Birth control methods are successful in most developed countries like Sweden, Germany,
Denmark and Great Britain, which can feed their people without difficulty. However, _________.
a) in the majority of the developing countries, they are a complete failure
b) they are necessary for overcoming the problem of population
c) modern techniques of birth control are acceptable to all religions
d) some countries give information about family-planning methods on the radio or TV
11. For many years, the earth has been unable to provide food for the rapidly expanding populations and the
problem is steadily getting worse as _________.
a) fuels and mineral ores are being used up at an ever-increasing rate with no hope of replacing them
b) the fertility of some of the richest soils has been lost and vast areas that were once fertile lands have
turned into deserts
c) new agricultural methods are being used by farmers in developed countries
d) plants and living creatures depend on each other and on the local environment
12. Nowadays many factories are irresponsible. They not only use a great deal of clean water but also
poison the rivers with their chemicals, and since they have failed to clean the rivers, the water system is
becoming more and more contaminated. As a result, _________.
a) there are still many factories which dump their waste into rivers
b) the rivers are no longer safe to swim in or drink from
c) it is dangerous to dump filthy water into rivers
d) a lot of people who ate the fish became ill
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Task 6. Write two or three supporting sentences for each of the following topic sentences.
E.g American football and European football are different in several ways.
a) American football is different from European football in terms of popularity.
b) These two games are played with different types of ball.
c) They also show differences in terms of uniform and equipment.
1. Visiting a foreign country might be an interesting experience.
a) __________________________________________________________________________.
b) __________________________________________________________________________.
c) __________________________________________________________________________.
2. Watching television too much has several negative effects on children.
a) _________________________________________________________________________.
b) _________________________________________________________________________.
c) _________________________________________________________________________.
3. Road accidents are due to several reasons.
a) _________________________________________________________________________.
b) _________________________________________________________________________.
c) _________________________________________________________________________.
4. There are three major factors contributing to obesity.
a) _________________________________________________________________________.
b) _________________________________________________________________________.
c) _________________________________________________________________________.
5. Basically, there are two types of personalities: Extroverts and introverts.
a) __________________________________________________________________________.
b) __________________________________________________________________________.
c) __________________________________________________________________________.
6. Computers and the Internet have changed our lives in many ways.
a) __________________________________________________________________________.
b) __________________________________________________________________________.
c) __________________________________________________________________________.
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H.W assignment: Choose one of the topic sentences which are about the topics you have studied in
Top Notch 2, and develop it into a paragraph. Do not forget to use transition signals to connect the
supporting sentences smoothly.
____________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________.
EDITING CHECKLIST
Make sure:
1. Every sentence has a subject and a verb.
2. There aren't any fragments.
3. There aren't any run-on sentences.
4. Each sentence begins with a capital letter.
5. Each sentence ends with the correct punctuation.
6. There isn't a comma between two simple sentences.
7. Each word is spelled correctly.
8. Conjunctions to join ideas are used correctly.
9. Every sentence is grammatically correct.
10. You have used transition signals correctly.
12. You have written a clear, effective topic sentence.
13. Most major ideas have been supported by specific details such as facts, examples etc.
14. Your concluding sentence restates or summarizes the main points in the topic sentence.
15. Your paragraph has unity and coherence.
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