SOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT IN EARLY CHILDHOOD
Ch. 10, Sroufe – Ch. 8, Berk
Erikson – Initiative vs. Guilt
Oedipal Complex
Sex-role development (notes)
Morality (notes)
SOME HALL.MARKS OF EARLYCHILDHOOD SOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT
The Child's Expanding World – day care, preschool, kindergarten contexts take the child away from
home and the mother. Mixed-sex peer relationships develop. Children are propelled by natural
curiosity to explore.
A child’s general adjustment, competence with peers, and complexity of play are all related to
the quality of day care and relationships with teachers.
Peer relationships become a central arena for developing and expressing certain new capacities
– e.g. understanding of fairness and reciprocity
Sibling relations – provide a unique framework – can engage in joint fantasy play with a
nurturant older sibling in a way they cannot do with their mothers.
Moving toward Greater Self-Reliance – important developmental achievement. Erikson’s initiative
and Bandura’s self-reliance (sense of being able to do things on one’s own as a result of
repeated experiences of mastery.
Greater self-reliance supported by several capacities of 3-4 yr. olds:
 Motor skills (e.g. climbing, manipulating objects) allowing them to do many things for
themselves
 Language and other cognitive abilities – think, plan, solve problems
 Growing ability to tolerate delays and frustrations, stick to a task despite obstacles and
setbacks
 Emerging capacity for imagination and fantasy play – allows for maintaining a sense
of power in a world generally controlled by adults (an important psychological
foundation for strivings toward independence
Problems – instrumental dependency (normal, need help with tasks) and emotional
dependency (not so normal clingy behavior that prevents exploration)
Self-Control and Self-Regulation – The ability to inhibit actions, despite knowing that they should.
Effortful control – ability to suppress some strong behavior, such as slowing down when
running or talking more quietly.
Self-regulation – effortful control as well as ability to direct their own activities and adjust
their behaviors and emotional expression to fit the situation.
Eleanor Maccoby – signs of self-control and self-management – ability to reflect on one’s own
actions, i.e. to monitor and direct those actions as needed, being able to inhibit actions, delay
gratification, tolerate frustration, and adjust behavior to situational demands. Older
preschoolers are able to:
 Weigh future consequences when deciding how to act
 Stop and think of possible ways around an obstacle blocking a goal
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Control emotions when goal-directed activities are blocked, thus greatly decreasing the
likelihood of tantrums
Concentrate – block out irrelevant thoughts, sights, and sounds and focus instead on
what is needed to reach a desired objective
Do more than one thing at a time, as long as they are not incompatible or highly
complex behaviors.
Further advances occur after the preschool period, and frankly, don’t we as adults often have
problems with these things?
Erikson’s Stage 3 - Play – Initiative vs. Guilt – Purpose (4yr. to school)
Abilities to master new tasks and skills, win approval by being productive, assume more
responsibility for themselves. Try out new things, social games.
Feelings of being counted as a person, life has a purpose. Tackling tasks for the sake of being on
the move. Goal directedness.
Crisis – Parents should encourage initiative. Acknowledge curiosity, do not ridicule fantasy
activity. Sense of guilt arises at this time, caused by parents who are unwilling to allow them the
opportunity of completing tasks on their own. Also fostered by parents who employ excessive
amounts of punishment in response to the child’s urge to love and be loved by the opposite-sexed
parent.
Child who is immobilized by guilt experiences feelings of resignation and unworthiness. Fearful
of asserting themselves, hang on the fringes of groups, and rely unduly on adults. Lack purpose or
courage to establish and pursue tangible goals.
Oedipal complex – ambivalent attitudes toward parents. Feelings of powerlessness and learning
ways of overcoming this feeling. If successful, health attitude of being initiator of own action. Or,
guilt over being dominated by environment.
From Berk:
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THE DEVELOPING SELF
Changes in Self-Understanding
Becoming aware of oneself as a person. Toddlers can represent themselves mentally, but only in
terms of immediate experience (I am eating an apple, I am sitting on the swing, I am walking up
the stairs, etc.)
Preschoolers can represent a variety of different experiences and alternate among them. Mentally
move back and forth among particular experiences, and more general ones. (e.g. getting ready for
bed last night vs. what bedtime is like in general), and past and present.
Can also uncouple various aspects of experience. Pretend and at the same time observe themselves
pretending.
Still have difficulty understanding they are the same person when they feel different in different
situations (e.g. nice in one situation and mean in another). Difficulty coordinating disparate
experiences into a unifies sense of self.
3-5 years – “I have”, “I can” – observable characteristics – name physical appearance,
possessions, everyday behaviors.
3 ½ use typical emotions and attitudes – “I’m happy when I…”, “I don’t like…” Trait terms used
for others but not self
Self-concept bound up with possessions and actions. Strong sense of self may be expressed in
early struggles over objects as effort to clarify boundaries between self and others.
Self-constancy
Self-Esteem – judgments we make about our own worth and the feelings associated with those
judgments. Preschoolers usually rate their own ability as extremely high and underestimate the
difficulty of tasks. However, by 4 some children give up easily when faced with a challenge, and this
is clearly due to parents who berate them for making small mistakes, or punishing them.
Gender and the Self
SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT: THE NEW WORLD OF PEERS
See the two Seans for example.
By age two children are showing the rudiments of social turn-taking – speak to or show something
to another child, wait for a response, and then repeat the cycle. Most of this early turn-taking
centers on objects, and they only occasionally response to other’s specific intentions. With
language their interactions become sustained and highly coordinated.
Competence with Peers – A number of behaviours indicate social competence: engaging and
responding to peers with positive feelings, who are of interest to peers and highly regarded by them,
who can take the lead as well as follow, who are able to sustain the give-and-take of peer interaction,
and who are able to form a reciprocal friendship - these children are judged by teachers and others as
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having social competence. The ability to have fun and to share that fun with others is one basis for
popularity.
Early Friendships - Preschoolers show preferences for others, and may for partnerships that last for a
year or more. By age 4 or so, children have considerable capacity to maintain friendships through
their own efforts (may also be helped by parents and by being in same school).
Friends have more frequent positive exchanges and are more cooperative in problem-solving tasks. In
experimental conflict situations they disagree with one another more often than mere acquaintances
do. However, conflicts are less heated, result in fairer solutions, and do not cause the children to
separate.
The Importance of Peer Relationships – a major setting for learning about the concepts of fairness,
reciprocity, cooperation, and interpersonal aggression. In peer groups children learn a great deal about
cultural norms and values, such as gender roles. Also, if they are positive or negative, can greatly
affect a child’s self-concept and future dealings with others. How well a child gets along with peers is
one of the strongest predictors of later success. It is related to levels of adjustment, psychological
problems, and even school achievement.
Increased peer interactions can sometimes help children overcome developmental problems. For
example, when socially withdrawn preschoolers were given the opportunity to interact one-on-one
with somewhat younger children in a series of special play sessions, they became more outgoing in
their regular classrooms. Having a chance to interact successfully with a peer seemed to enhance both
social skills and confidence about peer relations. Or a more competent, but tolerant, same-age peer
would also probably work. Or teaching social skills?
The therapist monkey, transitions
EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT
Young Children's Understanding of Emotion - the use of words indicates the differentiation of emotions.
By 6 years they are using words such as jealous, proud, embarrassed, and miserable. In general they
read emotion situations the same as adults, but not very good at interpreting the range of negative
emotions others may express.
Also have trouble distinguishing what people really feel from what they appear to feel (e.g understanding
that a person who is sad may put on a happy face, and vice versa). Between 5 and 8 they are able to
integrate situational cues and visible expressions of emotion to infer how someone else feels.
The Growth of Emotional Regulation - this includes the capacities to control and direct emotional
expression, to maintain organized behaviour in the presence of strong emotions, and to be guided by
emotional experiences.
Tolerating frustration: avoiding becoming so upset in a frustrating situation that emotions get out
of control and behaviour becomes disorganized. Begins to appear by about age 2 and expands
dramatically throughout the preschool years. Later preschoolers show less anger and tantrums than
younger children. Also stay engaged with the problem despite their frustration, and make more
constructive responses, such as asking others for help.
Simultaneous changes in relationships with parents – defiance of parents’ requests and passive
noncompliance with them decline markedly between ages 2 – 5. Increasingly able to tolerate the
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frustration of being asked to do something counter to their own wishes. Also begin to use
negotiation to resolve conflict.
Delay of gratification – the ability to forgo an immediate reward in order to have a better reward
later. The marshmallow experiment on Youtube. With adult help, they can usually endure the
frustration. Ability will expand through middle childhood years.
Undoubtedly some brain control here, and improving strategies for limiting tension buildup. Self
distraction, changing attention.
Showing flexibility in emotional expression: ego resiliency is the ability to adapt to situations
where self-restraint is required, as well as situations where impulsive and expressive behaviour is
required. It is the ego or self showing the capacity to be flexible in its control over the expression
of impulses and feelings.
Internalizing standards: standards become internalized, or adopted by the self. This means
compliance with parents prohibitions even when the parents aren’t present. Also shows signs of
concern for other people.
A cornerstone of moral development and the development of a conscience. By age 4 children
view moral transgressions, such as hitting someone or not sharing, as more serious than
conventional transgressions, such as eating ice cream with your fingers. Begin to make
judgments more independently from adults. Parents start to change their socialization
techniques . Direct, strong controls are replaced by indirect external controls such as “What a
good boy to let Bobby play....” and encourage self-regulation like “I’m counting on you to...”.
Encouraging self-regulation involves reasoning and persuasion. The child is now able to
understand why, and fairness and justice.
The Self-Evaluative Emotions: - Children now develop the feelings of guilt and pride – evaluating the self
against internal standards. Guilt is no longer based on punishment, but undermines self-esteem caused by
failure to live up to an internalized standard. Pride involves satisfaction when one solves a problem
oneself, and especially if it is difficult.
Emotional Development, Aggression, and Prosocial Behavior - Aggression, acts intended to harm others
or their possessions, and prosocial behaviour, positive feelings and acts directed toward others, with the
intention of benefiting them. Aggression can mean relinquishing self-control, although at times it can be
deliberate and calculating. Refraining involves self-management. Prosocial behaviour also involves selfmanagement. To be kind or helpful to someone else, you must often make a conscious effort to put aside
your own desires and enter into the other person’s point of view.
Aggression: Assertive and purposeful behaviour is not necessarily aggressive, because it does not
intend to cause harm. This requires that one be cognitively advanced enough to appreciate the
consequences of one’s actions. This ability develops sometime during toddlerhood, when
representational thought emerges.
Toddlerhood – increase in angry outbursts in response to constraints imposed by parents, as
well as in negative behaviour directed toward peers. Reach their peak in toddlerhood and early
preschool period. Much of object-centered
Preschool – true interpersonal aggression becomes common as children better understand the
self as an agent and the concept of fairness. Actions whose only purpose is to cause another
person distress.
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Late preschool and early elementary school – Overall level of physical aggression declines
because of a drop in instrumental aggression – the use of aggression as a means to get
something.
Middle childhood – aggression aimed solely at hurting someone else does not decline. Most of
these acts are concerned with getting even. Children lash out when they perceive that their
rights have been violated or their egos threatened. Hostile aggression then changes from
hitting to verbal insults and threats.
Empathy and Altruism:
Empathy – sensing the emotions of another person
Altruism – acting unselfishly to aid someone else
When empathy is aroused, children are more likely to be helpful towards others. Both of these
also depend on understanding that they are independent agents, like aggression.
Possible 3 stages in development of empathy and altruism:
1. Primitive capacity for empathy – infancy – crying when another person is distressed.
Will often go to mother when another baby is crying.
2. More purposeful helping behaviour – toddlers – hug or pat another child who is crying,
bring mothers over to crying youngster, or bring the child a favorite toy. Do what
would be helpful to themselves in that situation.
3. Capacity to take the perspective of others and capacity to respond of others’ needs –
early childhood – actual displays of helping though are rare in natural settings.
Boys and girls are equally likely to show helpful behaviour to others in need, but girls appear
to show more kindness, concern, and consideration.
THE ROLE OF PLAY IN PRESCHOOL DEVELOPMENT
Functions – a means by which they can be active explorers of their environments, active creators of
new experiences, and active participants in their own development. Play is a laboratory in which
children learn new skills and practice behaviours and concepts that lie at the very edge of their
capacities. Play is also a child’s social workshop, an arena for trying out roles alone and with other
children, and for expanding and preserving a sense of self. For preschoolers, play is also an arena
for emotional expression, often concerned with important themes and feelings from everyday life.
Play and Mastery of Conflict – Play reflects the issues or conflicts a child is dealing with - at the
level of social conditions (e.g. police and criminals, Palestinians-israelies) as well as more
personal conflicts (fear of animals, imaginary playmates, power roles reversed between parents and
child). The Laughing Tiger article.
Pretend solutions are usually a healthy outlet for preschoolers. Involve active confrontation
with a problem and provide prototypes for more mature solutions in later years.
Parental support and nurturance can help children find healthy resolutions to issues and
conflicts. Children engage in fantasy play that is more flexible and elaborate, and they are
more likely to bring negative themes to successful resolution. For example, the story of a
child lost in the woods is more likely to be resolved successfully by the parents finding the
child if there is a secure attachment relationship rather than an insecure one.
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Role Playing – opportunity to try out social roles and cultural values. Can be mommies, daddies,
doctors, teachers, police officers, robbers, soldiers. Can also act out aspirations and fears. Dressing
up allows for identifying with parents and grown-up roles.
Cultural factors – given the above importance of role playing, it is not surprising that there are
cultural differences in amount and type of fantasy play. First, having props encourages fantasy
play. Second, culture influences the things fantasized about. E.g. Korean-american 4 year olds
played more about everyday activities and family relationships, and tended to be nonconfrontational and to minimize conflict in their play. European-americans on the other hand,
focused more on fantasy themes and danger, and more likely to assert themselves and reject
their partner’s ideas and behaviours. Reflects different cultural values.
The amount, flexibility and elaborate the fantasy play the more socially competent the child is
likely to be as judged by teachers.
THE PARENTS' ROLE IN EARLYCHILDHOOD DEVELOPMENT
Important Aspects of Parenting in the Preschool Period – Generally, parental warmth, emotional
responsiveness and sharing of positive feelings with the child lead to the development of empathy
and prosocial behaviour. These are some of the same qualities of parenting we have seen to be
important at earlier ages.
Consistency in the parents approach to discipline, agreement between parents concerning childrearing practices, and low levels of marital conflict tend to be more important for preschoolers than
for younger children. This may be because the expanded cognitive abilities of preschoolers cause
them to become confused by inconsistencies and to be more aware of conflict.
Children’s developmental tasks change with changes in abilities and needs. Hence, parental tasks
also change.
Parents need to gradually give children more responsibility, while remaining available to
step in and help if the children’s resources are exceeded. Children at this age will often try
to do too much as they strive for mastery (Erikson). If parents frequently ridicule or punish
a preschooler’s failures, the child may experience pervasive feelings of guilt. Parents must
neither push too hard nor thwart their efforts. Parents must also try to display clear roles
and values in their own actions and show the flexible self-control they hope to promote in
their child.
Parents’ Tasks
Nurturance
Training & channelling of physical needs
Teaching and skill training
Orienting child to family and peers
Promoting interpersonal skills and control
of emotion
Guiding formation of goals, plans and
aspirations
Transmitting cultural values
Children’s Tasks
Accepting care and developing trust
Complying and controlling self
Learning
Developing a general understanding of the
social world.
Role taking
Achieving self-regulation
Developing a sense of right and wrong
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Parenting Styles (Diana Baumrind)
Authoritative parenting – nurturant, responsive, and supportive, but set firm limits for their
children and hold them to high standards. Preschoolers are generally energetic, emotionally
responsive to peers, curious, and self-reliant.
Permissive parenting – parents totally fail to set firm limits or to require appropriately mature
behaviour. Associated with children who are impulsive, low in self-control, and lacking selfreliance.
Authoritarian parenting – unresponsive to their children’s wishes and inflexible and harsh in
controlling their children’s behaviour. Related to apprehension, frustration, and passive hostility in
European-American children throughout childhood and into adolescence.
There are some cultural differences in the effects of parental style.
Chinese-American families show many characteristics of authoritarian parenting, but also
show many characteristics of authoritative parenting, such as reasoning with children about
misbehaviour. Children do not show negative effects of authoritarian parenting.
[Chinese concept of chiao shun (training/teaching) and guan (to govern/to care for or
love)]
Researchers has recently discovered that non-abusive physical punishment is associated
with heightened child aggression in European-American families, but not in AfricanAmerican families. Perhaps due to how physical punishment is used or what other
parenting behaviours are associated with it; e.g. African-American parents usually do not
combine physical punishment with a withdrawal of love which many European-American
parents do (?). Even in African-American families, when discipline is unduly harsh and
coercive, especially when accompanied by lax guidance, it is related to later aggression
and other conduct problems.
Different environmental contexts may make a difference in the effectiveness of different
parenting styles. In poor urban areas, authoritarian style does not seem to have negative
effects, perhaps because it is perceived as caring (?).
Marital conflict can have adverse effects on children, being related to negative play with
peers, anxiety about parents whereabouts, and an increased level of behavioural problems
such as aggression.
Divorce can also have an effect on kids this age, because they are cognitively mature
enough to grasp the anger and incompatibility between the parents, but not yet mature
enough to understand the marital breakup is not their fault.
Identification with Parents
This section of the Sroufe text is an excellent example of differing forms of explanation. Compare,
e.g., with Fraiberg’s chapter on identification.
THE COHERENCE OF BEHAVIOR AND DEVELOPMENT
The Coherence of the Self
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The Coherence of Behavior Over Time
Explaining Developmental Coherence
Stability and Change in Individual Behavior
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