in·teg·ri·ty (n):
1. the quality of being honest and having strong moral
principles; moral uprightness.
2. the state of being whole and undivided. SYNONYMS: honesty, probity, rectitude, honor, fairness,
trustfulness, trustworthiness, unity, coherence,
togetherness, soundness, strength, sturdiness, stability.
Taking It Home:
Activity: All of us have a moment in our life when the
strength of our character stood out as we acted out of our
deepest sense of what was morally right & most true.
Your assignment: Spend some time before your next
meeting reflecting on how that moment of high resolve not
only brought you pride but challenged you to live up to it
again and again. Books:
V for Vendetta by Alan Moore
A Hidden Wholeness: The Journey Toward an Undivided Life by
Parker Palmer
Movies:
Chocolate
The Shawshank Redemption
Video: A Christopher Hitchens Memorial http://www.upworthy.com/people-were- outraged-by-what-hesaid-his-entire-life-but-right-before-he-died-he-was-still-at- it?
c=reccon2 Article: “The Insufficiency of Honesty,” by Stephen L. Carter,
http://www.nyu.edu/cas/ewp/nicolichsufficiency d03.pdf These materials are part of the small group ministry program at
Jefferson Unitarian Church. For more information on using them, or to
set up your small group, please contact Rev. Eric Banner.
ericbanner@jeffersonunitarian.org
(303)279-5282 ext. 28
http://www.jeffersonunitarian.org/SmallGroups
Jefferson
Unitarian Church
January 2015 Small Group Session: Integrity
Opening/
Chalice
Lighting:
Check In:
Reading:
Resting
in the
Silence:
Saying yes to life is the beginning point of spiritual
adulthood. As with every other passage on the
spiritual journey, we can get encouragement from
others, but in the end, the yes has to come forth
from our own selves, body and soul. ~ Tirzah Firestone Questions
and Quotes
From The
Common
Bowl:
Pass around the bowl with the questions and
additional readings. Have each person take one
question/reading. When all have a question/
reading, go in a circle with each person sharing
what is written on their piece of paper. After each
person has read theirs, read them aloud a second
time.
Up to 2 minutes per person to share what they
bring with them since the last time the group met
Sharing/
Deep
Listening:
Allow each person up to five minutes to share
what has come up for them about today’s topic. If
someone does not use the full five minutes, make
sure you count to ten full breaths before moving
on to the next person, in case the speaker is not
truly finished.
A Second
Share:
If time allows, you may have a brief second share
from those who have found they have more to
say, keeping in mind your commitment to going
no longer than ninety minutes.
Closing
Reading:
“Everyone makes mistakes, so being a person of
integrity does not mean you haven’t committed a
moral or ethical violation, ever. It means having
the strength of character to learn from those
‘misbehaviors’ and seek continual selfimprovement.” ~ Eric Kail “On some questions, Cowardice asks the
question, “Is it safe?” Expediency asks the
question, “Is it polite?” And Vanity comes along
and asks the question, “Is it popular?” But
Conscience asks the question, “Is it right?” And
there comes a time when we must take a position
that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but we
must do it because Conscience tells us it is right.”
~ Martin Luther King Jr.
Take 2 minutes to just sit. If your group is up to
it, go longer, as long as you let people know how
long the silence will be.
Extinguish Join hands and say the following together:
the Chalice:
“We give thanks this day for the gifts of
community and companionship that will hold us
until we meet again.” And then, extinguish your chalice until you meet
again. “Once you lose your integrity, the rest is easy.” ~ Larry Hagman as J. R. Ewing
on the TV series Dallas (1978-1991)
Courage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you
can't practice any other virtue consistently. ~ Maya Angelou
Do your friendships have integrity?
"I now know myself to be a person of weakness and strength, liability and
giftedness, darkness and light. I now know that to be whole means to reject
none of it but to embrace all of it.” ~ Parker Palmer
What one thing could you embrace right now to feel more whole?
Re-examine all that you have been told, dismiss that which insults your soul.
~ Walt Whitman
“Each of us is an artist of our days; the greater our integrity and awareness, the
more original and creative our time will become.” ~ John O'Donohue, To Bless
the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings
Does integrity bring you joy? Or does it feel like work?
“Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other
people.” ~ Spencer Johnson
“You are only afraid if you are not in harmony with yourself.” ~ Hermann Hesse
“They're certainly entitled to think that, and they're entitled to full respect for
their opinions... but before I can live with other folks I've got to live with myself.
The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.”
~ Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
Are you facing such an impossible situation right now? As you struggle, are you
being kind to yourself?
“Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.” ~ C.S. Lewis
Does your spiritual life have integrity?
Excerpt from V for Vendetta by Alan Moore
“I know there's no way I can convince you this is not one of their tricks, but I
don't care, I am me. My name is Valerie, I don't think I'll live much longer and I
wanted to tell someone about my life. This is the only autobiography I’ll ever
write, and god, I'm writing it on toilet paper. I was born in Nottingham in 1985, I
don't remember much of those early years, but I do remember the rain. My
grandmother owned a farm in Tuttlebrook, and she use to tell me that god was
in the rain. I passed my 11th lesson into girl's grammar; it was at school that I
met my first girlfriend, her name was Sara. It was her wrists. They were beautiful.
I thought we would love each other forever. I remember our teacher telling us
that is was an adolescent phase people outgrew. Sara did, I didn't. In 2002 I fell
in love with a girl named Christina. That year I came out to my parents. I couldn't
have done it without Chris holding my hand. My father wouldn't look at me, he
told me to go and never come back. My mother said nothing. But I had only told
them the truth, was that so selfish? Our integrity sells for so little, but it is all we
really have. It is the very last inch of us, but within that inch, we are free. I'd
always known what I wanted to do with my life, and in 2015 I starred in my first
film, "The Salt Flats". It was the most important role of my life, not because of
my career, but because that was how I met Ruth. The first time we kissed, I
knew I never wanted to kiss any other lips but hers again. We moved to a small
flat in London together. She grew Scarlet Carsons for me in our window box,
and our place always smelled of roses. Those were the best years of my life. But
America's war grew worse, and worse. And eventually came to London. After
that there were no roses anymore. Not for anyone. I remember how the meaning
of words began to change. How unfamiliar words like collateral and rendition
became frightening. While things like Norse Fire and The Articles of Allegiance
became powerful, I remember how different became dangerous. I still don't
understand it, why they hate us so much. They took Ruth while she was out
buying food. I've never cried so hard in my life. It wasn't long till they came for
me.It seems strange that my life should end in such a terrible place, but for three
years, I had roses, and apologized to no one. I shall die here. Every inch of me
shall perish. Every inch, but one. An Inch, it is small and it is fragile, but it is the
only thing in the world worth having. We must never lose it or give it away. We
must never let them take it from us. I hope that whoever you are, you escape
this place. I hope that the world turns and that things get better. But what I hope
most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that even though I
do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry
with you, or kiss you - I love you. With all my heart, I love you. - Valerie”