Positive and negative effects of the mind
Some common forms of negative and irrational self-talk include:

Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation
and filter out all of the positive ones. For example, say you
had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of
time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough
job. But you forgot one minor step. That evening, you focus
only on your oversight and forget about the compliments you
received.

Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you
automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an
evening out with friends is canceled and you assume that the
change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you.

Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst.
You refuse to go out with friends for fear that you'll make a
fool of yourself. Or one change in your daily routine leads you
to think the entire day will be a disaster.

Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad, black
or white. There is no middle ground. You feel that you have to
be perfect or that you're a total failure.
Negative self-talk
Positive spin
I've never done it before.
It's an opportunity to learn
something new.
It's too complicated.
I'll tackle it from a different
angle.
I don't have the resources.
Necessity is the mother of
invention.
There's not enough time.
Let's re-evaluate some priorities.
There's no way it will work.
I can try to make it work.
It's too radical a change.
Let's take a chance.
No one bothers to communicate
with me.
I'll see if I can open the channels
of communication.
I'm not going to get any better at I'll give it another try.
this.



Look At Your Intentions: Think about what you are
trying to create in your life. This means, look at the end
product, and the behaviors, attitudes and traits you
would like to see yourself develop in order to get there.
Would you like to feel more peace? Would you like to
practice more healthy lifestyle habits? Would you like to
be a more supportive friend? You might want to write in
a journal and brainstorm to figure out what’s important
to you and get to the heart of what you want to create in
your life. (A good starting point is to imagine your ideal
life, pretend a fairy has given you three wishes, or try to
visualize what you were put on Earth to be.)
Create Statements: Once you get an idea of what you’re
aiming for, try to put that idea into a few simple
statements that reflect the reality of what you want to
create. Phrase the statements as if they are already true,
not that you would like them to be true. For example, the
affirmation, “I am feeling more peaceful each day,” would
be better than, “I want to feel more peaceful.” This is
because you are programming your subconscious mind to
believe the statements, and that helps manifest them
into reality. You’re not trying to want something, you’re
trying to make it so.
Be Sure They’re Positive: When making positive
affirmations, be sure they’re positive! This means saying
what you want to see and experience, not what you don’t
want to see and experience. For example, instead of

saying, “I don’t want to feel stress,” or even, “I’ve stopped
feeling stress,” use, “I’m feeling peace”. Sometimes your
mind doesn’t register the negative, and it just hears the
concept, “stress”, which is what you’re trying to avoid.
Use Mine: If you’d like some ideas for affirmations
designed to reduce stress in your life by increasing
peaceful thoughts, feelings of safety, and fostering a
stronger sense of self-efficacy, you can check out my
Stress Management Affirmations, or you can discover
them the fun way by playing Affirmation Hangman. (If
you’re going to play the game, don’t look at the list until
afterward, or guessing the affirmations in the game will
be too easy!)
Once you’ve found your affirmations, here are some fun ways to
introduce positive affirmations into your life:



Repetition: Probably the most popular way to harness the
power of affirmations is to simply repeat them to yourself
on a regular basis. Repeating them mentally several
times in the morning or evening can be effective;
repeating them aloud is even more effective because you
hear them more clearly that way.
Do-It-Yourself Recording: You can make a recording of
yourself repeating positive affirmations and play it as
you drive, get reading in the morning, or do other
activities. Talk in a calm voice, maybe play your favorite
soothing music in the background, and you have a
recording tailor-made especially for your needs!
On Post-Its: A fun way to use affirmations is to put them
on post-its that you place around your house (on the
fridge, on the bathroom mirror, and other places you’ll
likely see them) to give yourself positive messages
throughout the day. This technique can be effective on its
own, or can be used with other affirmation techniques as
a reinforcer.

Self-Hypnosis: To really increase the effectiveness of
affirmations, you can use them with self-hypnosis. This is
a way to really cement them into your subconscious
thinking much more quickly than repeating them in your
normal conscious state. (Here’s more information on the
benefits of self-hypnosis and how to use self-hypnosis for
stress management.)