Descriptive Writing at GCSE
Doctor’s Surgery
The sound of the slightest movement echoes within the hostile white walls of the
room as each shift of a limb provokes an uncomfortable squeak from the crisp leather
seats. There are several pinboards dotted around the room breaking up the clinical
brightness. They are plastered with various, slightly more colourful leaflets headed
with ‘Alcoholics Anonymous’ and ‘Teen Pregnancy – the Facts’. Some of the waiting
take to reading them to pass the time whilst others look down at the floor with its
uniform brown carpet. A stack of dated magazines is piled up in the corner next to the
humming tropical fish tank. A woman leans across to pick up a copy of ‘Bella’,
whispering at her son to take his fingers off the glass. He glares at her sulkily and
places his hands in his dungaree pockets, then returns to his watch of the peaceful
motion of the fish as their colourful bodies glide across the water.
In the corner there is a small pile of ‘duplo’ bricks that remain untouched,
despite the presence of three young children in the room. An elderly gentleman sits
beside them, a plaid flat cap placed next to him on the seat. His wrinkled eyes are red
and drooping behind his thick rimmed lenses. The reception door opens and a cheerful
pink-lipped woman sticks her head around the door. ‘Mr James?’ she trills, smiling.
‘Just a word if you please.’ A young man in school uniform stands up hesitantly and
walks across the room. His discomfort looks apparently magnified in a blazer that
appears two sizes too big for him and trousers with a distinct crease down the front.
‘Nothing to worry about love, just routine,’ the nurse reassures him soothingly,
noticing the pained apprehension on his face. He walks through the door and it shuts
with a quiet click behind him. The remaining soon return to counting the number of
pins in the noticeboard or flicking through last year’s edition of ‘Hello’, silently.
The clock ticks on monotonously in the background.
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Notes:

How does this differ to a story?

What do you notice about the tense?

How many of the senses are appealed to in this description?

What do you notice about the use of dialogue?

What is actually being described within this description? E.g. Old man, fish
tank etc.

Pick out the 5 most effective adjectives that are used.

Pick out as many adverbs that you can.

Pick out 3 prepositional phrases.
Typical examples you could get in an exam:
 My Favourite Room
 The Supermarket on a Busy Saturday
 The Park
 The Bus Stop
 The Beach
 The Pier
 The Campsite