Minutes of the
Cougar Parent Connection Meeting
April 4, 2007
The meeting commenced at 7:00 p.m. with Dr. Cwick making opening comments.
Dr. Cwick’s comments included thanking Cheryl Chrysler for being Cougar Parent Connection
President and for all of her hard work over the past several years. Dr. Cwick said she and the
staff have been encouraging the seniors to be as involved as possible with school activities
during their remaining two months. Dr. Cwick cited the following events taking place in the
near future at the school: National Honor Society Induction, the North Suburban Art Show, the
Mr. Cougar Contest, Orchesis Dance Show, Prom, Honors Day Assembly, Graduation and
Senior Party.
Cheryl Chrysler announced that the following people nominated for positions on the Cougar
Parent Connection Board for the upcoming school year (’07-‘08) needed to be elected:
Jackie Monteith, President
Jackie Argianas, Secretary
Ivy Winston, Vice President
Cindy Mazza, Treasurer
As none of these positions were opposed, a motion was made and seconded to elect these
nominated people to the positions indicated. Cheryl did announce that an editor for the
newsletter was still being sought. The editor position was not complicated and only involved the
producing of newsletters about five times a year. She also mentioned that minutes from the
Cougar Parent Connection January 2007 meeting were available for review and if any one
noticed any discrepancies, he or she should please notify either Cheryl Chrysler or Jackie
Argianas.
The panel of speakers addressing what parents need to know about sending their senior off to
college was introduced. The panel included Trish Duh, whose son was attending Illinois
Wesleyan, Leslie Nardini, whose daughter attends Winona State in Minnesota, Diane Palace,
whose daughter is at the University of Iowa, Margie Perez, whose son attends Southern Illinois
University, Cheryl Chrysler whose son attends University of Illinois and Joyce Doerhoefer, Lab
Supervisor at Northwestern University Health Service. The following are highlights from each
panelist.
Trish Duh (Illinois Wesleyan) – Be aware of emotional changes taking place in you and your
child. Some children react to what is happening by being quiet, some become argumentative.
Be sure to participate in the school’s orientation program and all it has to offer in order for the
student to be as comfortable as possible. Allow for a four-to-six week adjustment period.
Usually by November everything is fine. Set standards with your child, i.e., when/how often to
call home, grades to be expected. Determine banking options. Depending upon medical
insurance benefits, finding a doctor at school might be wise—schools are petri dishes of germs.
Expect classes in college to be more challenging than high school, and, therefore, grades may be
lower. Discover the transportation available to and from your school and home. Most dining
packages can be tailored to your student’s needs.
Leslie Nardini (Winona State, MN) – Leslie’s daughter is attending school on a soccer
scholarship, and therefore, had to be at school prior to academic-only students. This made
moving into the school very easy, but the campus was desolate which could lead to more anxiety
on an already hugely emotional endeavor. A box was best for transporting items to dorm room.
Dorm rooms are NOT beautiful, decorating is needed. Communicate with roommate about
sharing dorm needs so as not to double up with items. Students use cell phones and emails to
communicate with family. A laptop is probably necessary to college life. Leslie thought
budgeting would be very important, but it turned out that less money than originally thought was
required. If a student is hoping to play a sport in college, he/she must be his/her own best
advocate. The coaches at the school want to see how committed the student is to playing, and
therefore, want to hear from the student. Leslie thought that sending her daughter to college was
extremely difficult, but that in retrospect, EVERY stage in your child’s life is the hardest. Leslie
cautioned to be aware of the change in your family dynamic after a child leaves to go away to
school.
Diane Palace (University of Iowa) – Diane’s advice included having your student make the first
call home, not the parent making first call to student. Set up a communication plan prior to
going away. Having a child sick at school is very difficult. Before leaving for school, discuss
with your student what to do when he/she is sick at school. Diane cautioned students about
rushing a sorority or fraternity before their first semester of school because the people met are
actually only acquaintances; there has not been enough time for friendships to evolve. Provide
problem-solving techniques; discuss money matters and how to “do” the laundry prior to leaving
for school. Single parents tend to be over-emotional with the child leaving for school – try to be
excited and upbeat so the child can feel that way, too. Be aware that if a school’s culture is
different from that in which the student was raised, feelings of alienation and isolation could
occur. Choosing a school is not a life-long commitment; a student can always transfer if
unhappy. Diane advised the student to become involved with a school activity prior to the start
of classes, so that other students can be met. Acknowledge a student’s homesickness, however,
keep issues in perspective. Everything seems okay after an amount of time has passed.
The panel members were questioned on their views of having a roommate the child already
knows versus someone never before met.
A question was also posed as to how the panel members address the issue of alcohol use on
campus and when the student returns home.
The panel was asked how they determined the amount of money required by each student in
addition to educational costs. $125 a month seemed to be the average amount provided to the
students.
Margie Perez (Southern Illinois University) -. Margie’s insights included purchasing items at
stores at home before going to school. The stores at school are overcrowded and depleted of
stock. Margie packed her student’s items in extra large plastic zip lock bags, which could
conform to any shape when packed in a car. Margie advised purchasing bedding, rugs, etc. on
you own, not through the school, as the school’s prices are excessive and the quality is not good.
Margie also suggested instead of giving students cash, give gift cards so that you know exactly
on what the money is being spent.
Cheryl Chrysler (University of Illinois) – Cheryl’s advice and experience included reading the
material provided by the school. There is great advice and a ton of information provided in their
literature. Cheryl advised against using the Illini Express as a form of transportation to and from
the school and home in Vernon Hills, as it is extremely unreliable. Cheryl suggested, if possible,
moving into the dorm a day before the publicized date. It is not possible at all dorms, but if it is,
she highly recommends it, as you won’t have to fight for elevators, carts, etc. Leave some bins
at the dorm in which the student can protect food. Know the dorm’s requirements of all
electronic devices/appliances. Not all dorms can handle any size/wattage of appliances.
However, Cheryl suggested purchasing appliances on your own rather than renting from the
school, because of the price differential. Cheryl concurred with Margie not to buy the school’s
rug and bedding, but to be sure to know what size bedding to purchase prior to arriving at school.
Cheryl also cautioned against attending The Container Store’s College Night. She said that, too,
was way overcrowded. Cheryl stressed knowing the “little” things, such as whether or not a
wastebasket is needed, realizing a telephone and answering machine are not necessary since ALL
students use cell phones, knowing whether closets have locks to protect valuables, and if not,
investing in some type of safe box to store cash and valuables. Cheryl also advised that at U of I
cables for computers and software discounts are available. Students generally lock laptops in
their dorm. Cheryl’s student discovered that a window fan is better than a stand-up fan, and that
stackable drawers are necessary to store small furnishings and clothing – no drawers are
provided by the University. Also, a 25¢ doorstop proved to be a great investment, it provided for
ease of communication and air circulation. Do not bring a GOOD bike to school, as it is always
exposed to the elements and takes a beating. Talk to your student about class scheduling
priorities, because the student makes his/her own schedule. It is a good idea to have your student
purchase books on the day you are there for move-in because the books are too heavy for the
student to carry on their own back to the dorm from the bookstore. Look into insurance through
the school, there may be substantial savings, but be aware that no medical info can be released to
you without the student giving approval. As far as instilling the student with a desire for good
grades, sometimes motivation is required – bad grades students purchases the books, good grades
parents purchase books. Also to motivate child to look for scholarships (which are plentiful),
offer to match scholarship dollars for the student. Be aware of FAFSA (financial aid) forms and
their due dates – they differ according to students grade level and state of residence.
Good ideas for graduation gifts – Rolls of quarters for laundry (for those schools which still have
coin-fed laundry machines); gift cards to cover expenses for stocking dorm room; tool kits; gift
certificates for nearby restaurants
Joyce Doerhoefer, Laboratory Supervisor (Northwestern University Health Service) –
Joyce clarified that the doctors, nurses and other healthcare professionals available at universities
and colleges are, in fact, real and authentic. All state universities have health services available.
These services include counseling services for separation anxiety and academic performance
anxiety. Joyce stressed the importance of talking with your student about what to do if he/she is
ill, as it can be very traumatic the first time it happens away from home. Be sure to send the
basic over-the-counter meds and explain how to use them (Advil, Tylenol, thermometer,
hydrocortisone cream). She also advised instructing students to keep fluids in their rooms. Send
your child with the names and phone numbers of their physicians. Be sure to know if your
insurance covers what your student will need and send an insurance card with your child, and,
possibly, a credit card. If your insurance is not so good, consider purchasing the school’s
insurance to supplement it. Due to HIPAA requirements, medical staff is NOT allowed to
provide parents with ANY information regarding the student, unless written permission from
student is provided. Make sure your child is educated regarding any chronic health issues. Your
student should know that college health professionals are non-judgmental and are there to help.
Remind your student they are there for them.
Questions by the audience were posed and answered by the panel.
Cheryl then addressed other business issues of Cougar Parent Connection. She announced that
volunteers are needed for the Honors Assembly on June 1 and the Staff Appreciation Luncheon
on May 18. Cheryl thanked all who attended and adjourned the meeting at approximately 8:45.
37 in attendance