Writing technically Skills PART B Writing Technically - an Interactive Grammar Guide Summary of this Grammar Guide This is a very short Grammar guide with some of the key features associated with technical writing. There are activities in this guide and links to web sites with online quizzes. It should be read in conjunction with Part A - Writing the Report. Writing clearly and precisely are some of the key features of good technical writing. In order to do this, you need to know your audience and what is expected in a scientific/technical report (see Part A of Writing Technically - Writing the Report). You also need to be able to write objectively. As a reader of your technical report, I want to know what was done, the main findings and your conclusions. In order to display objectivity you need to use the passive. You may find that Word underlines some of your text in green. This is a query on your grammar, so you should always check it out. However, it can also query the passive, so ignore it if you feel the passive is correct. Finally, check out some of the usual ‘grammatical sins’ to which we are all prone. 1.0 Improving your Technical Writing Style 2.0 Being Objective - The Passive 3.0 Writing Clearly 3.1 Understanding sentence basics: clause packets 3.2 Recognising signal words 3.1.1 describing cause and effect 3.1.2 indicating something similar or unexpected 3.1.3 comparing and contrasting 3.1.4 expressing degrees of certainty 3.1.5 being precise 3.1.6 writing about processes 4.0 Correcting your Grammatical Sins 4.1 Sentence fragments 4.2 Run on sentences 4.3 Agreement problems 4.4 Faulty parallelism 1 1.0 Improving your Technical Writing Style The mark of good technical writing lies in being able to write with: objectivity, clarity, accuracy, criticality and appropriateness. OBJECTIVITY| you make the underlying assumptions of your argument clear. You have a balanced view given the data and results you have. You take care not to write your opinions as though they were facts. You avoid words like: obviously, surely, and of course. You critically reflect on your own work as well as that of others. CLARITY| you write clearly with simple sentences that are put together logically showing evidence of clear scientific thinking. ACCURACY | the statements you make are related to the evidence -either your evidence of that of other researchers. Your sentences are precise and not woolly and you don't make general sweeping statements without evidence. CRITICALITY| you are able to be dispassionate and evaluate your own work (and that of others). APPROPRIATENESs| you are aware of your reader and you know what information they need to understand your work. You present your work clearly in order to facilitate this. You understand the kind of report you are writing and you write with the appropriate style. 2.0 Being Objective - The Passive When you write your methods section, you will need to state what you did, the conditions of experiment/investigation and the equipment you used. The reader will be interested in what was done and not PASSIVE who did it. ACTIVE And since you carried out your procedure in the past, you will use the past tense. An example (using the past tense for both active and passive forms) Active: From the moisture content, I calculated the void ratio, the specific volume and the unit weight of the sample at the end of the test. I assumed that the sample was fully saturated before doing this. Passive: From the moisture content, the void ratio, the specific volume and the unit weight of the sample were calculated at the end of the test. It was assumed that the sample was fully saturated before doing this. NOTE: For a passive sentence you should have no personal pronouns, e.g. I, We. Writing technically Skills NOTE: Your lab notebooks and professional diaries will not need the passive. There is also a move to encourage simplicity by writing in the active form only. Some web sites will say that it is bad practice to write in the passive. However, in the academic world, passive is still used. You need to check with your tutor what is expected of you. An explanation! Sentence Focus Remember your writing should be objective, accurate and precise. The passive makes it feel more objective. Past tense The glass was strengthened. subject: the glass tense: the past interest: what happened This appears more objective. Passive Present ttetense The glass is strengthened. subject: the glass tense: the present or for all time interest: what happened This appears more objective. Passive Past tense I strengthened the glass. Subject: tense: Interest:: I past what I did This appears more subjective Active NOTE If you get in a muddle with the passive, always choose CLARITY over the passive. 3 Activity 1: writing in passive and active Now you try some - convert to either passive or active. Passive construction Active construction Mike weighed the gelatine. We extended the beam. I stalled the airflow by adjusting the aerofoil. I dropped the weights into the water. My partner noticed that the string broke at this point. See Key to Activities 3.0 Writing Clearly Clarity and accuracy are key features of technical writing. The activities below should sensitise you to this. In order to revise your work, it is important that you understand how sentences can be crafted. 3.1 Understanding sentence basics : clause packets To know how to write clearly you must understand how sentences are constructed. A sentence comprises one or more clauses. Every sentence is a clause packet and has to have at least an independent (or main) clause. A complex sentence made up of several clauses can be co-joined to form one sentence (e.g. two independent clauses joined by ‘ and’, ‘ or’, ‘ but’). It can also be made up of an independent clause and several dependent ones. Dependent clauses cannot form a sentence on their own. Dependent clauses are recognised by words such as: ‘ although’, ‘ if’, ‘ despite’, ‘since’ and ‘….ing words’ such as – ‘considering’, ‘relating’, ‘defining’ etc. at the beginning of a clause. An explanation! Single Clause Sentence 1. For the last hundred years the climate [1] has been growing [2] much warmer. Multi-clause Sentence Comment A single clause sentence. [1] subject [2] verb Writing technically Skills 2. For the last hundred years the climate [1] has been growing [2] much warmer and [3] this [4] has had [5] a number of different effects. 3. Since[1] the beginning of the 20th century, scientists [2] have observed [3] that glaciers [4] have been melting [5] very rapidly. 4. Temperature increases [1] have caused [2] the snowline to retreat on mountains all over the world, resulting in [3] the agricultural crop line [4] shifting [5] north, which [6] has effected changes to vegetation. Two independent clauses joined with ‘and’ to form one sentence. [1] subject of this clause and the next one (replaced by ‘this’) [2] verb for that subject [3] coordinator for next clause . [4] ‘this’ replaces ‘climate much warmer’ and is also the subject of this clause. [5] verb for this clause A two clause sentence: a dependent and an independent clause forming one sentence. [1] link word introducing a dependent clause [2] subject of the dependent clause [3] verb for dependent clause [4] subject of main clause [5] verb of main clause A three clause sentence comprising: independent clause, dependent clause and a clause dependent on the dependent clause (known as a relative clause) [1] the subject of the main clause [2] verb for main clause [3] introducing the dependent clause [4] subject of dependent clause [5] verb for dependent clause [6] introducing the relative clause giving you more information about the effect of shifting the crop line. Remember! Every sentence must have an independent (main) clause for it to be complete. See also: Capital Community College’s excellent site: http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/conjunctions.htm#coordinating_conjunctions and try out their quizzes. 5 Activity 2 : Sentence Combining : test your sentence knowledge by combining the sentences into ONE sentence. Combine two sentences into one A. i. ii To reduce their design complexity, most networks are organised as a series of layers or levels. Each level in a network is built upon its predecessor. _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ B. i. ii. Each layer passes data and control information to the layer immediately below it. Data and control information is passed all the way to the lowest layer. _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ Combine more sentences into one sentence: C. i. ii. iii. iv. The The The The number of layers differ from network to network. name of each layer differs from network to network. content of each layer differs from network to network. function of each layer differs from network to network. _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ D. i. ii. iii. Layer 3 decides which of the outgoing lines to use. It attaches its own headers. It passes data to layer 2. _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ Writing technically Skills E. i. ii. iii. iv. v. vi. vii. viii. ix. There is a difference between humans and animals. There is a difference between humans and plants. The difference is significant. Each takes up a niche. Each niche is determined. Humans determine their own niche. Humans can manipulate their niche. The niche of an animal is determined by genes. The niche of a plant is determined by genes. Example taken from : http:// www.wvmccd.cc.ca.us/wcv/la/pelican/schelp.html _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ See Key to Activities For more exercises like this, check out: http://webster.commnet.edu/grammar/quizzes/combining_quiz2.htm 3.2 Recognising Signal Words As proficient readers we all recognise signal words. If you see first in a text you know there will be a list of items to follow and you possibly scan the text to find second and third so that you can quickly obtain an overview of the list. There are many signal words that link ideas, join clauses and signal meaning, e.g. cause and effect, something unexpected, compare and contrast, degrees of certainty, and processes. This is not a full list, but enough to give you an understanding of the importance of these words. These words signal to the reader how you are developing your argument. Without these words, it would be very difficult for the reader to follow your line of reasoning. These useful lists below have been adapted from Cooper, Janelle (1979) Think and Link, Edward Arnold, London. Try writing some sentences with these link words…. 3.2.1 DESCRIBING CAUSE [C] Link word AND EFFECT [E] Your sentence [E] because XXX [C]. The reason for XXX is that XXX [C] [C]. Therefore, [E]. 7 So, [E]. Consequently, [E]. Hence, [E]. [C], as a result of which, [E]. [C], as a consequence of which, [E]. One effect of XXXX was that [E]. One result of XXXX was that [E]. As a consequence of XXX, XXX [E]. 3.2.2 INDICATING SOMETHING SIMILAR OR UNEXPECTED Try building your own sentences with these words Something similar Something unexpected xxx. In addition to xxx, xxx. However, xxx xxx and [also] xxx Xxx but xxx As well as xxx, xxx Despite xxx, xxx in spite of xxx, xxx Xxx not only, but also xxx xxx. Nevertheless, xxx 3.2.3 COMPARING AND CONTRASTING Try building your own sentences with these words Similarities Differences Xxx is the same as xxx Xxx is different from xxx Xxx differs from xxx Xxx resembles xxxx in xxx Xxx whereas xxxx Xxx while xxxxx is xxx Xxx is as xxxxx as Xxx is less than xxx Xxx is more than xxx Similarly, xxx On the other hand, xxx However, xxxx Introducing the concept for comparison: As regards temperature, xxx With regard to temperature, xxx As far as temperature is concerned, xxx With respect to temperature, xxx Writing technically 3.2.4 Skills EXPRESSING DEGREES OF CERTAINTY % Frequency Certainty Verb 100% always certainly undoubtedly will must simple present tense usually generally as a rule 0% 3.2.5 should ought to often probably likely presumably sometimes occasionally possibly perhaps rarely seldom hardly ever unlikely can could may might will not cannot could not simple present tense (negative) never BEING PRECISE Make the following vague sentences more precise. Look at your own work and add some of your own examples. Frequency Vague Quantity Precise Vague The measurements were recorded at frequent intervals. A substantial amount of reagent was applied. The apparatus was stable, so it was rarely checked. A huge amount of Sulphur was added. Precise The smallest possible amount of water was used. 9 3.2.6 WRITING ABOUT PROCESSES You may refer to a : process, steps or stages within a process (procedure) Putting things in order: Previously, xxx Earlier, xxx Beforehand, xxx Before this xxx Prior to this xxx Firstly, xxx First of all, xxx To begin with xxx The first step/stage is xxx Secondly, xxx Next, xxx Then, xxx After this, xxx The next step is xxx Finally, xxx The final step/stage is xxx The last……… 4.0 Grammatical Sins Some of the most common grammatical errors that people make are: sentence fragments, run-on sentences, agreement problems, and faulty parallelism (Capital Community College: Guide to Grammar and Writing: http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/sins.htm). These errors usually occur when you do not fully understand the basics of sentence construction and the idea of clause packets. Information in this section is important during your editing stage. So, what are these grammatical sins and do they apply to you? Take some writing you have done in the past and see if you can spot any of these errors. 4.1 SENTENCE FRAGMENTS These are bits of text that fail to make a complete sentence. Very often this is because the writer will start his or her sentence with a dependent clause and then forget to add the independent (main) clause. But there are other reasons as well. Writing technically Skills Activity 3 Sentence Fragments Sentence fragment What is wrong? Can you repair it? When the system logs the activity. Calling up the local telephone company office at 9600 bps. Another potentially revolutionary difference between satellite and terrestrial links. Considering all the problems associated with landfills, including the time needed for finding suitable locations, obtaining public acceptance and constructing the landfills. Can you find one from your own writing? See Key to Activities For more activities like this see: http://webster.commnet.edu/grammar/sins.htm 4.2 RUN ON SENTENCES These are independent clauses that have been pushed together to create a sentence. However, the correct linking has not been used. As a result the sentence turns out to be a bit of a muddle. 11 Activity 4 Run on Sentences Sentence run on What is wrong? Can you repair it? The wave responded to the stimulus, it performed to within 5% of its predicted value. Large improvements in the water supply and sanitation sector of Estonia and Romania have been achieved, therefore, from an environmental perspective these projects are considered successful. In general, the investment programmes have been successfully undertaken, we have found that 80% of the project components have been completed to high engineering standards. The results of the first experiment supported the hypothesis, it was decided to continue with the second experiment. Can you find one from your own writing? See Key to Activities For more activities like these ,try some online quizzes at: http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/runons.htm Writing technically Skills 4.3 AGREEMENT PROBLEMS Subject-verb agreement refers to an alignment of the subject with the verb, e.g. Sentence Explanation The experiment was successful. Experiment is a singular noun and the verb ’ to be’ - was - agrees with the noun and is also singular. The results are positive Results - a plural noun needs the verb also to be in plural form – are. Everyone Someone Each of All of us None of us is/has are/have Takes the singular form of the verb. Takes the plural form of the verb. Either of the results is acceptable. Neither of the journals was appropriate. Either and neither take singular. Everyone involved in experiments is expected to carry out a risk analysis. Although experiments is plural, the agreement is governed by everyone and always the singular form. The same applies to: someone and each of. Activity 5 subject - verb agreement What is the pattern for using the singular or plural form of the verb in examples below? Sentence An explanation - can you find the rule? Some of (or 5% of) the acid was spilt. Some of (or 5% of) the cells were destroyed. Some of (or 5% of) the data were rejected. The majority of (or 10% of) the journals were available. The majority of (or 10% of) the fluid was preserved. See Key to Activities Sometimes you have lots of words between subject and the verb. When this happens it is easy to forget which word the verb has to agree with. 13 Professor Smith, new member of staff in Oceanography, founder of the Oceanic Society and famous for many important theories in this area, is holding an introductory lecture today. NOTE: ‘Data’ is a Latin word with datum being the singular and data the plural. For more activities like these, try some online quizzes at: http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/sv_agr.htm http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/pronouns.htm 4.4 FAULTY PARALLELISM Parallelism refers to how you express a group of ideas that have equal importance. This may sound a bit vague, but when you see a bad example of parallelism, you know immediately that something is wrong because the text just does not read well. Here is an example of poor parallelism. Read this sentence out loud. Does it seemed disjointed to you? Therefore, Matlab is well suited to the analysis of brain potentials and of the function of the autonomic nervous system during workload. As a reader, you may find you have to read it several times to understand it. This is because the sentence structure isn't parallel. How would you improve the sentence? Try the correction yourself before looking at the suggested correction. And analysis of the sentence above. Therefore, Matlab is well suited to This introduces a list of items the analysis of brain potentials Item 1: the analysis of….. And Link word (coordinator) of the function of the autonomic nervous system during work load. Item 2: this should also start with ‘the + noun’ in order to balance construction of item 1, i.e. a parallel structure. Suggested correction: Therefore, Matlab is well suited to the analysis of brain potentials and [to] the analysis of the function of the autonomic nervous system during workload. OR (with slight modification to the rule!) Therefore, Matlab is well suited to the analysis of brain potentials and the functional analysis of the autonomic nervous system during workload. Writing technically Skills When you want to make lists, compare and contrast things or link things together with and/or/both/neither etc, then this is a signal to you that you need to think about parallel structures. Activity 6 Parallelism a. Bulleted lists How could you improve this list? The main causes of land contamination are: Poor industrial practices resulting in spillage of chemicals. Leakage from underground and above-ground storage tanks. Deposits of wastes in the ground. b. Lists in the text How could you improve this? Contaminated land is a major environmental issue which has been neglected due to a poor understanding of its implications and fears that land values may inversely affect businesses. For more information on bulleted lists see: Online Technical Writing from Brooklyn College: interactive quiz for list writing. http://www.io.com/~hcexres/tcm1603/acchtml/listq.html Punctuation for lists see http://www.klariti.com/business-writing/Guidelines-BulletLists.shtml - from Ivan Walsh, who runs Klariti.com and specializes in Professional Writing Services C.Parallel structures How could you improve these sentences? Students will be introduced to the various sediment sampling and acquisition techniques and equipment employed in such studies. The lecturer complained that one of his bright students handed his work in late, produced a messy copy and was failing to complete all the activities. See Key to Activities Parallelism is important for the reader because information flows more naturally and information is easier to identify. During the editing phase skim for: Conjunctions like: and/or/but. Places where you compare and contrast information. Lists of information, either as a bullet list or a list in the text. 15 Make sure the information around these constructions is presented in a parallel form. When reading your work aloud, notice where you stumble over certain areas and check it out. For more activities like these, try some online quizzes at: http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/parallelism.htm http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/grammar/g_parallel.html NOTE: As with everything, you don't have to be too rigid. If you find parallelism is getting in the way of clear communication, select ‘clear communication’ in preference and make modifications. Writing technically Skills Key to Activities Activity 1: Writing in Passive and Active Passive construction Active construction The gelatine was weighed. Mike weighed the gelatine. The beam was extended. We extended the beam. The airflow was stalled by adjusting the aerofoil. I stalled the airflow by adjusting the aerofoil. The weights were dropped into the water. I dropped the weights into the water. It was noticed (noted) that the string was broken at this point. My partner noticed that the string broke at this point. Activity 2: Sentence Combining There is more the one solution to combining the sentences -here it is an example… A. To reduce their design complexity, most networks are organised as a series of layers or levels, each one built upon its predecessor. Use a comma to link the sentences, then ‘each one’ replaces ‘Each level in a network..’ B. Each layer passes data and control information to the layer immediately below it, until the lowest layer is reached. ‘ until’’, a subordinating conjunction, is used to join the two sentences. C. The number of layers, the name of each layer, the contents of each layer and the function of each layer differ from network to network. The key thing is that all these elements differ from network to network. List them by putting, a comma after each one and an AND for the last one. D. Layer 3 decides which of the outgoing lines to use, attaches its own headers, and passes the data to layer 2. You're listing three things that layer 3 does using a comma and a AND for the final one. The same format as C above. E. The significant difference in this is that the niche humans take up is a selfdetermined and can be manipulated, where as the niche of an animal or plant is genetically determined. Key pieces of information are in bold. You don't need to add all the sentences Together. Just take the key ideas and make a new sentence. 17 Activity 3: Sentence Fragments Sentence fragment A solution When the system logs the activity. When the system logs the activity, it sends a message to its base station, which then allocates unavailable frequency to it. ‘ when’ signals a dependent clause. The independent clause was missing. In example above the independent clause has been further modified with the relative clause (starting with ‘which’) to add more information. Calling up the local telephone company office at 9600 bps Calling up the local telephone company office at 9600 bps will never give more bandwidth than 9600 bps, no matter how wide the intermediate link is. ‘ Calling up the local telephone company office at 9600 bps’ is the subject of the sentence, so the next thing we want is the verb. In the sentence above it is there ‘will never give ’. Another potentially revolutionary difference between satellite and terrestrial links Another potentially revolutionary difference between satellite and terrestrial links is the bandwidth available. There was no verb sentence fragment and the sentence was incomplete as we didn't know what this revolutionary difference was. Considering all the problems associated with landfills, including the time needed for finding suitable locations, obtaining public acceptance and constructing the landfills. Considering all the problems associated with landfills, including the time needed for finding suitable locations, obtaining public acceptance and constructing the landfills, a timely decision on the eventual construction of new controlled landfills must be made. adapted from: Waste Management Policies in Central and Eastern European countries: current policies and trends (final report), October 2001, p.49. Once again when writing a long dependent clause, it is easy to forget the independent clause that is needed to make it a complete sentence. ‘Considering’ at the beginning of sentence signals a dependent clause. Writing technically Skills Activity 4: Run on Sentences Sentence run on What is wrong? Can you repair it? The wave responded to the stimulus, it performed to within 5% of its predicted value. The wave responded to the stimulus and performed as expected. Large improvements in the water supply and sanitation sector of Estonia and Romania have been achieved, therefore, from an environmental perspective these projects are considered successful. Large improvements in the water supply and sanitation sector of Estonia and Romania have been achieved. Therefore, from an environmental perspective these projects are considered successful. In general, the investment programmes have been successfully undertaken, we have found that 80% of the project components have been completed to high engineering standards. In general, the investment programmes have been successfully undertaken. We have found that 80% of the project components have been completed to high engineering standards. The results of the first experiment supported the hypothesis, it was decided to continue with the second experiment. The results of the first experiment supported the hypothesis, so it was decided to continue with the second experiment. Two independent clause is joined with a comma is incorrect. Use a coordinator like ‘ and’ to join the sentences. Some other links you can use are: but, for, nor, yet, or, so. You can also join small independent clauses using a semi colon. ‘ Therefore’ should be the start of a new sentence. The same applies to ‘however’. You can also ‘front’ ‘however’ and ‘therefore’ e.g. “From an environmental perspective therefore, ….…. Again a comma is linking two independent clauses. You can make two separate sentences as suggested above, or join the sentences correctly with ‘and’. Again a comma is linking two independent clauses. Linking with ‘so’ or ‘and’ can solve this. However, the version below is correct since it starts with a dependent clause signalled by ‘As’: As the results of the first experiment supported the hypothesis, it was decided to continue with the second experiment. Can you find one from your own writing? 19 Activity 5: subject-verb agreement Sentence Explanation Some of (5% of) the acid was spilt. Acid, and fluid are all things you can't count, i.e. they can't answer the question “ how many?” Therefore, you use singular form of verb. These are called ‘ noncountable’ nouns. Some of (5% of) the cells were destroyed. Some of (5% of) the data were rejected. The majority of (10% of) the journals were available. The majority of (10% of) the fluid was preserved. Journals, data and cells are things you can count and can answer the question “ how many?” So, if a countable noun is singular, you must use a verb in the singular form. If it is plural, then the verb must also be in the plural form. Activity 6: Parallelism a. Bulleted lists Here is a suggested improvement of the list. Original Change The main causes of land contamination are: Poor industrial practices resulting in spillage of chemicals Leakage from underground and aboveground storage tanks Deposits of wastes in the ground The main causes of land contamination are: Poor industrial practices resulting in spillage of chemicals Underground and above-ground leakage from storage tanks Waste deposits in the ground The list needs to align with the first one. b. Lists in the text Original Change Contaminated land is a major environmental issue which has been neglected due to Contaminated land is a major environmental issue which has been neglected due to a poor understanding of its implications a poor understanding of its implications and and fears that land values may inversely affect businesses. a fear that land values may inversely affect businesses. This last part is not parallel Writing technically Skills C.Parallel structures Original Change Students will be introduced to the various sediment sampling and acquisition techniques Students will be introduced to the various sediment sampling and acquisition techniques and the equipment employed in such studies. and equipment employed in such studies. Simply add ‘ the’ so that it parallels ‘ the various sediment….. techniques’ used earlier. Always check the structure before and after a conjunction like: and/or/but. These conjunctions signal information of an equal status and therefore should be written in the same way. The lecturer complained that one of his bright students handed his work in late, produced a messy copy and was failing to complete all the activities. The lecturer complained that one of his bright students handed his work late, produced a messy copy and failed to complete all the activities. Here there is a lack of parallelism within the list. This reads much better now 21