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WRITERS ON WRITING
FOCUSING ON WRITING
1. How would you characterize Vonnegut's style in this piece? Do you think he has
followed his own advice? Explain.
2. Did you feel Vonnegut's respect for you as a reader as you read his essay? Specifically,
what in his essay led you to this conclusion?
3. Identify several of the metaphors and similes that Vonnegut uses. (Glossary:
Figures of Speech) How does each one work in the context of this selection? What
advantages does figurative language afford the writer?
LANGUAGE IN ACTION
Read the following poem by New Englander James Hayford. What insights does it give
you about style? Would Vonnegut be likely to agree or disagree
with Hayford's view? How would you characterize Hayford's own style in this poem?
Explain.
STYLE
' As the cold currents of the brook Render
its sands and pebbles clear, Just so does
style in man or book Brighten the content,
bring it near.
WRITING SUGGESTIONS
1. (Writing from Experience) Have you read any of Vonnegut's novels? If so, write him a
letter in which you share your reactions to his work. If not, write a letter to an author
whose work you have read. Be sure that in writing your letter you follow Vonnegut's
advice in this selection.
2. (Writing from Reading) How do you suppose Vonnegut would react to Richard Lederer's
essay "The Case for Short Words" or William Zinsser's "Simplicity, " which follows?
Write an essay in which you explore some of the reasons why writers find it difficult to
follow Vonnegut's third rule: Keep It Simple.
3. (Writing from Research) As Vonnegut suggests, look at a copy ofStrunk and White's The
Elements of Style. Does the size of the volume surprise you? Write an essay in which you
argue for or against requiring this book for every incoming first-year student at your school.
Support your position with references to Strunk and White and to other sources you
discovered in the library or on the Internet.
Simplicity
WILLIAM ZINSSER
Born in New Tork City in 1922, William Zinsser was educated at Princeton
University. After serving in the army in "World War II, he worked at the New
York Herald Tribune as an editor, writer, and critic. During the 1970s he taught
a popular course in nonfic-tion at Tale University, and from 1979 to 1987 he
was general editor of the Book-of-the-Month Club. Zinsser has written more
than a dozen books, including The City Dwellers (1962) Pop Goes America
(1966), Spring Training (1989), and three widely used books on writing: On
Writing Well (6th ed., 1998), Writing with a Word Processor (1983), and Writing
to Learn (1988). Currently, he teaches at the New School in New Tork City, and
his freelance writing regularly appears in some of our leading magazines.
The following selection is taken from On Writing Well. This book grew out of
Zinsser's many years of experience as a professional writer and teacher. In this
essay, Zinsser exposes what he believes is the writer's number one problem —
"clutter." He sees Americans "strangling in unnecessary words, circular
constructions, pompous frills, and meaningless jargon." His solution is simple:
Writers must know what they want to say and must be thinking clearly as they
start to compose. Then self-discipline and hard work are necessary to achieve
clear, simple prose. No matter what your experience as a writer has been, you will
find Zinsser's observations sound and his advice practical.
WRITING
TO DISCOVER: Some people view writing as "thinking on paper." They
believe that by seeing something written on a page they are better able to "see
what they think." Write about the relationship, for you, between writing and
thinking. Are you one of those people who likes to "see" ideas on paper while
trying to work things out? Or do you like to think through ideas before writing
about them ?
Clutter is the disease of American writing. We are a society strangling in
unnecessary words, circular constructions, pompous frills, and meaningless jargon.
Who can understand the viscous language of everyday American
commerce: the memo, the corporation report, the business letter, the notice from the
bank explaining its latest "simplified" statement? What
155
156
WRITERS ON WRITING
member of an insurance or medical plan can decipher the brochure explaining his costs
and benefits? What father or mother can put together a child's toy from the instructions
on the box? Our national tendency is to innate and thereby sound important. The
airline pilot who announces that he is presently anticipating experiencing considerable
precipitation wouldn't think of saying it may rain. The sentence is too simple—there
must be something wrong with it.
But the secret of good writing is to strip every sentence to its cleanest
components. Every word that serves no function, every long word that could be a short
word, every adverb that carries the same meaning that's already in the verb, every
passive construction that leaves the reader unsure of who is doing what—these are the
thousand and one adulterants that weaken the strength of a sentence. And they usually
occur in proportion to education and rank.
During the 1960s the president of my university wrote a letter to mollify the
alumni after a spell of campus unrest. "You are probably aware," he began, "that we
have been experiencing very considerable potentially explosive expressions of
dissatisfaction on issues only partially related." He meant the students had been
hassling them about different things. I was far more upset by the president's English
than by the students' potentially explosive expressions of dissatisfaction. I would have
preferred the presidential approach taken by Franklin D. Roosevelt when he tried to
convert into English his own government's memos, such as this blackout order of
1942:
Such preparations shall be made as will completely obscure all Federal
buildings and non-Federal buildings occupied by the Federal government
during an air raid for any period of time from visibility by reason of
internal or external illumination.
"Tell them," Roosevelt said, "that in buildings where they have to 5 keep the
work going to put something across the windows."
Simplify, simplify. Thoreau said it, as we are so often reminded, and no
American writer more consistently practiced what he preached. Open Walden to any
page and you will find a man saying in a plain and orderly way what is on his mind:
I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the
essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and
not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.
How can the rest of us achieve such enviable freedom from clutter? The answer is
to clear our heads of clutter. Clear thinking becomes clear writing; one can't exist
without the other. It's impossible for a muddy thinker to write good English. You may
get away with it for a paragraph or two, but soon the reader will be lost, and there's no
sin so grave, for the reader will not easily be lured back.
WRITERS ON WRITING
WILLIAM ZINSSER: Simplicity
157
Who is this elusive creature, the reader? The reader is someone with an attention
span of about 30 seconds—a person assailed by other forces competing for attention.
At one time these forces weren't so numerous:
newspapers, radio, spouse, home, children. Today they also include a "home
entertainment center" (TV, VCR, tapes, CDs), pets, a fitness program, a yard and all
the gadgets that have been bought to keep it spruce, and that most potent of
competitors, sleep. The person snoozing in a chair with a magazine or a book is a
person who was being given too much unnecessary trouble by the writer.
It won't do to say that the reader is too dumb or too lazy to keep pace with the
train of thought. If the reader is lost, it's usually because the writer hasn't been careful
enough. The carelessness can take any number of forms. Perhaps a sentence is so
excessively cluttered that the reader, hacking through the verbiage, simply doesn't
know what it means. Perhaps a sentence has been so shoddily constructed that the
reader could read it in several ways. Perhaps the writer has switched pronouns in
mid-sentence, or has switched tenses, so the reader loses track of who is talking or
when the action took place. Perhaps Sentence B is not a logical sequel to Sentence
A—the writer, in whose head the connection is clear, hasn't bothered to provide the
missing link. Perhaps the writer has used an important word incorrectly by not taking
the trouble to look it up. The writer may think "sanguine" and sanguinary" mean the
same thing, but the difference is a bloody big one. The reader can only infer (speaking
of big differences) what the writer is trying to imply.
Faced with such obstacles, readers are at first tenacious. They blame
themselves—they obviously missed something, and they go back over the mystifying
sentence, or over the whole paragraph, piecing it out like an ancient rune, making
guesses and moving on. But they won't do this for long. The writer is making them
work too hard, and they will look for one who is better at the craft.
Writers must therefore constantly ask: What am I trying to say? Surprisingly
often they don't know. Then they must look at what they have written and ask: Have I
said it? Is it clear to someone encountering the subject for the first time? If it's not,
some fuzz has worked its way into the machinery. The clear writer is someone
clearheaded enough to see this stuff for what it is: fuzz.
I don't mean that some people are born clearheaded and are therefore natural
writers, whereas others are naturally fuzzy and will never write well. Thinking clearly
is a conscious act that writers must force upon themselves, as if they were working on
any other project that requires logic: adding up a laundry list or doing an algebra
problem. Good writing doesn't come naturally, though most people obviously think it
does. Professional writers are constantly being bearded by strangers who say they'd
like to "try a little writing sometime"—meaning when they retire from their real
profession, which is difficult, like -insurance or real estate. Or they say, "I could write
a book about that." I doubt it.
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WRITERS ON WRITING
Writing is hard work. A clear sentence is not accident. Very few sentences come out right
the first time, or even the third time. Remember this in moments of despair. If you find that
writing is hard, it's because it whard. It's one of the hardest things people do.
FOCUSING ON CONTENT
1. What exactly is clutter? When do words qualify as clutter, and when do they not?
2. In paragraph 2, Zinsser states that "Our national tendency is to inflate and thereby sound
important." What do you think he means by inflate? Provide several examples to illustrate
how people use language to inflate.
3. In paragraph 9, Zinsser lists some of the language-based obstacles that a reader may
encounter in carelessly constructed prose. Which of these problems most try your patience?
Why?
4. One would hope that education would help in the battle against clutter, but, as Zinsser notes,
wordiness "usually occur[s] in proportion to education and rank" (4). Do your own
experiences or observations support Zinsser's claim? Discuss.
FOCUSING ONWRITING
1. What assumptions does Zinsser make about readers? According to Zinsser, what
responsibilities do writers have to readers? How do these responsibilities manifest themselves
in Zinsser's writing? How do you diink Linda Flower (pp. 139^41) or Kurt Vonnegut (pp.
150-53) would respond to what Zinsser says about audience? (Glossary: Audience) Explain.
2. Zinsser believes diat writers need to ask themselves two questions—"What am I trying to
say?" and "Have I said it?"—constandy as they write. How would diese questions help you
eliminate clutter from your own writing? Give some examples from one of your essays.
3. In order "to strip every sentence to its cleanest components," we need to be sensitive to die
words we use and know how diey function widiin our sentences. For each of die "adulterants
diat weaken die strength of a sentence," which Zinsser identifies in paragraph 3, provide an
example from your own writing.
4. Zinsser knows diat sentence variety is an important feature of good writing. Locate several
examples of the short sentences (seven or fewer words) he uses in dlis essay, and explain how
each relates in length, meaning, and impact to the sentences around it.
LANGUAGE IN ACTION
The following two pages show a passage from Zinsser's final manuscript for this essay.
Carefully study die manuscript, and discuss how Zinsser eliminated clutter in his own prose.
Then, using Zinsser as a model, judiciously eliminate die clutter from several paragraphs in one
of your papers.
WILLIAM ZINSSER: Simplicity
is too dumb or too lazy to keep pace with the wifpte train of thought. My
sympathies are -entifftAy with hi«i.'^ He «e »a»-i-o dim*'. (Tf^the reader is
lost, it is generally because the writer «t too article has not been careful
enough to keep him on the fWfM path.
I This carelessness can take any number of (Afferent foms.
V» <—
Perhaps a sentence is so excessively leag and cluttered that
the reader, hacking his way through aU the verbiage, simply doesn't know vihat.'the
writer means. Perhaps a sentence has been so shoddily constructed that the reader
could read it in c-ny ofjwB*or throe aiJferant ways .'~He^»feirito- ho }fiwno what .tha
writar in tirylne ^o nny, but, hri'n not. mh-^rn-li-irn the writer has switched pronouns in
mid-sentence, or perhaps ha has switched tenses, so the reader loses track of who
is I talking i-te whain^ • or axaotly when the action took place. Fer-| haps Sentence
B is not a logical sequel to Sentence k — the | writer, in whose head the connection
is parfaptly clear, has notjSSS^Si^JgL^^^tu jJruYiding the missing link. Perhaps the
writer has used an important word incorrectly by not taking the trouble to look it up
ana nnlin gura» He may think that "sanguine" and "sanguinary" nean the same thing,
but)
I aaa agawa you that C]£he difference is a bloody big one-te tha •^r
J
0
*•A4e2•<^fc<Muonly «ry-«e infer J*ok (speaking of big differences) what the
writer is trying to imply.
1 Faced with.aueh a- variety «S obstacles, the reader
is at first a remarkably tenacious bird. He tendo ta blame'
^^
\
himself, yk obviously missed something, ho thiriM, and he goes back over
the mystifying sentence, or over the whole paragraph, piecing it out like an
ancient rune, making guesses and moving on. But he won't do this tor
long.'^Ha will oeen mn au« ef p«»t«n8>. i^The writer is making him work
too hard "^.h»ae>
0>M> he •hauld hay ta Mark—<"and~the reader will look-for
•1C.
(—.who is better at his craft.
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WRITERS ON WRITING
i The writer must therefore constantly ask himself: What am I trying to
sa.y'Ji.n this «»nt«BC»? ^Surprisingly often, he doesn't know./
•AiW~pien he Bust look at what he has Just. written and ask: Have I said
it? Is it clear to someone ^'SSfWSSSCC >»*• the subject for the first
time? If it's not slew, it is because some fuzz has worked its way into the
machinery. The clear writer is a person who t« clear-headed enough to
see this stuff for what it is: fuzz.
I don't mean ta «Hflga«t that some people are born clear-headed and
are therefore natural writers, whereas »t75p people are naturally fuzzy and will
»h»v»S»pa never write
well. Thinking clearly is an enttpely conscious act that the
•f^^CCte writer nust.lmy fepeiae upon himself, just as if he were
*ph*3JBC out on any other itfaxi a£ project tha^«lfi^*l»r logic:
adding up a laundry list or doing an algebra problen ar •Inying— •>>»••» Good
writing doesn't -j^s*- cone naturally, though most people obviously think *)>'•
aa'eaay •e-wallting. The professional
WRITING SUGGESTIONS
1. (Writing from Experience) Think about what you do every time you write. Does your process
differ from that described by Hairston (pp. 131-36) or Zinsser? Write an essay in which you
discuss any differences you discover between your own writing process and those described by
Hairston and Zinsser. Does your writing process change with the type of writing you are
doing? Explain.
2. (Writing from Reading) Each of the essays in Chapter 6, "Writers on Writing," is concerned
with the importance of writing well, of using language effectively and responsibly. Write an
essay in which you explore one of the common themes (audience, revision, diction, simplicity)
that is emphasized in two or more of the selections.
3. (Writing from Research) Visit your library and/or local bookstore and examine the reference
books offering advice on writing. What kinds of books did you find? What does the large
number of such books say to you about Americans' attitudes toward writing? Compare and
contrast the approaches several books take and the audiences at which each book is aimed.
What conclusions can you draw from your comparisons?
The Maker's Eye: Revising Tour
Own Manuscripts
DONALD M. MURRAY
Born in Boston, Massachusetts, in 1924, Donald M. Murray taught writing for
many years at the University of New Hampshire, his alma mater. He has served
as an editor at Time magazine, and he won the Pulitzer Prize in 1954 for
editorials that appeared in the Boston Globe. Murray's published works include
navels, short stories, poetry, and sourcebooks for teachers of writing, like A
Writer Teaches Writing (1968), The Craft of Revision (1991), and Learning by
Teaching (1982), in which he explores aspects of the writing process. Write to
Learn, (6th ed,. 1998), a textbook for college composition courses, is based on
Murray's belief that writers learn to write by writing, by taking a piece of writing
through the whole process, from invention to revision.
In the following essay, first published in the Writer in October 1973 and later
revised for this text, Murray discusses the importance of revision to the work of the
writer. Most professional writers live by the maxim that "writing is rewriting." And to
rewrite or revise effectively, we need to become better readers of our own work,
open to discovering new meanings, and sensitive to our use of language. Murray
draws on the experiences of many writers to make a compelling argument for
careful revising and editing.
WRITING TO DISCOVER: Thinking
back on your education to date, what did you think
you had to do when teachers told you to revise a piece of your writing7 How did the
request to revise make you feel7 Write about your earliest memories of revising
some of your writing. What kinds of changes do you remember making7
When students complete a first draft, they consider the job of writing done—and
their teachers too often agree. When professional writers complete a first draft, they
usually feel that they are at the start of the writing process. When a draft is completed,
the job of writing can begin.
That difference in attitude is the difference between amateur and professional,
inexperience and experience, journeyman and craftsman. Peter F. Drucker, the prolific
business writer, calls his first draft "the zero draft"—after that he can start counting.
Most writers share the feeling that the first draft, and all of those which follow, are
opportunities to discover what they have to say and how best they can say it.
To produce a progression of drafts, each of which says more and says it more
clearly, the writer has to develop a special kind of reading skill.
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