Name:_________
Class:_______
Editing Exercise A
Instructions:
The following paragraph contains three needless sentence fragments. First, identify the three fragments, and
then correct each one--either by attaching it to an adjacent sentence or by turning the fragment itself into a complete
sentence. Were this a test question, it would be scored at nine points – one point per fragment, and two points per
correction.
Why Do We Keep Pets?
Most American families have at least one member who never works, seldom speaks, and spends most of the day either
eating or sleeping. No, I'm not talking about your brother or crazy Uncle Carl, but our pets – our dogs, cats, hamsters,
turtles, and fish. Why do so many of us keep these lazy and unproductive creatures in our homes? Most people would
agree that pets are ideal companions for young and old alike. Studies demonstrating that pets give the elderly a sense
of security and companionship. Which may help them overcome loneliness. In some cases, the enthusiasm and
devotion of a pet dog can actually make sick persons feel better. At times, feeding the fish, walking the dog, or putting
the cat out at night. These activities can teach young children a sense of responsibility. Our pets may not contribute to
the family income, but I know from experience that they give us a great deal in terms of comfort and companionship.
The following paragraph contains six errors in subject-verb agreement. Find and correct each of the six verb
errors. This would be a three point question, one half point per correction.
Santa
According to legend, Santa Claus is a fat old man who visits every house on our planet in about eight hours on one of
the coldest nights of the year. Santa, as everybody knows, stop for a glass of milk and a cookie at each house along the
route. He prefer to work unnoticed, so he wears luminous red suit and travels with a pack of bell-jangling reindeer. For
reasons that most people does not understand, this jolly old man enters each house not by the front door but through
the chimney (whether you has a chimney or not). He customarily gives generously to children in wealthy families, and
he usually remind poorer children that it's the thought that counts. Santa Claus is one of the earliest beliefs that parents
try to instil in their children. After this absurdity, it's a wonder that any child ever believe in anything again.
Directions:
Rewrite each sentence below according to the instructions in parentheses. On a test, these would be between two and
three point questions, depending on the required corrections.
In the early part of the month of April we traveled in our own car to the city of New Orleans in the state of Louisiana.
(Remove the unneeded words to make the sentence concise)
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
We received a free complimentary copy of a book about the past history of education in America from the salesman.
(Remove the unneeded words to make the sentence concise)
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
I saw for the first time in my life the high grasslands of the Navajos, the fringes of the Painted Desert, the faraway
buttes and mesas of the Hopi country, through the wide open window of my old Camaro.
(Rearrange the sentence in order to put the emphasis on the details of the place, not how they were viewed)
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Mr. Head's face was long and tubelike, and he had a rounded open jaw, and he had a short depressed nose.
(Rewrite this sentence to stop relying on the word 'and' to link related ideas.)
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
The little child walked quietly on the tips of his toes past the very young dog.
(Use more specific language to describe what is happening in this sentence. Hint: young dog = puppy)
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Our boat was entirely surrounded on all sides by sharks in the water around us.
(Remove the unnecessary elements in this sentence to increase the dramatic impact)
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Editing Exercise B
How to Build a Fire in a Fireplace
In this paragraph there are five errors that involve words that look a lot like the word the author should have used. Try
to find them all and correct them.
Lighting a Fire
Though "experts" differ as to the best technique to follow when building a fire, one generally excepted method consists
of first lying a generous amount of crumpled newspaper on the hearth between the andirons. Kindling wood is than
spread generously over this layer of newspaper and one of the thickest logs is placed across the back of the andirons.
This should be as close to the back of the fireplace as possible, but not quiet touching it. A second log is then placed an
inch or so in front of this, an a few additional sticks of kindling are laid across these two. A third log is then placed on
top to form a sort of pyramid with air space between all logs so that flames can lick freely up between them.
Adding Content & Description
Instructions:
Take the opening sentence and the following sentences and add descriptive details that reflect what might be
happening in the scene. You will want to copy your version to a separate sheet of paper.
One brisk afternoon in late September, I took a walk down Prospect Street.
Music thudded out of the shop and mingled with some of the other noises of the city.
(Identify the kind of music that "thudded out of the shop," name the shop, and give some specific examples of
"the other noises of the city.")
Garbage danced along the sidewalk and lay crushed against the curb.
(For the word "garbage," substitute specific examples of litter. Describe the street in more detail; what else is
present in the scene?)
A woman reading a book was sitting there.
(Briefly describe the woman, identify the book she was reading, and specify where she was sitting.)
Steam blew out of the air vents of a restaurant, carrying with it various smells.
(Name the restaurant, and identify some of the smells coming out of it.)
An old man was talking to "Annie," even though he was walking by himself.
(Describe the old man in more detail.)
A red-faced man was pleading with a traffic cop as the cop was doing something.
(What was "the cop" doing?)
A "New" Apartment
Yesterday morning I toured my "exclusive" new apartment that I had foolishly rented 'site unseen'.
Below you'll find six sets of notes and short sentences describing some of the things that I observed as I walked around
the apartment. Take the impressions I had and arrange them into complete sentences and ideas. You will have to do
this work on your own paper; do not try to finish the writing on this sheet.
Example:
Details:
Footprints marched across the ceiling.
the living room ceiling
stiff wedges of pizza
pizza ground into the carpet
Sentence:
Footprints marched across the ceiling in the living room, and stiff wedges of pizza were ground into the carpet.
Details:
Light bulbs were smashed in their sockets.
Several sets of initials were carved into the coffee table.
torn sofa cushions
cushions dusted with crushed saltines
Details:
stale odour
dozens of Coke cans lined up on the windowsills
Coke cans stacked up in a pyramid in one corner
Details:
puddles of milk and orange juice in the kitchen
half-empty cat food cans on the counter
mound of eggshells in the sink
The refrigerator door was wide open.
old tennis shoe inside the refrigerator
Details:
The bathroom was just as bad.
shaving cream on the walls
sock jammed into the drain of the bathtub
name "Fred" written in toothpaste on the mirror
Pages taken & modified from "Editing Exercises" Richard Nordquist. Ask.Com, Web. 30 Oct 2011