We Will Rock You Musical
Adapted by Lina María, Jason and Billy.
Main characters
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Galileo
Scaramouche
Killer Queen
Khashoggi
Pop
Britney and Meat
Secret Police
The Bohemians
Ga Ga kids
Scene I-Introduction.
The narrator begins. “It is 2314, a company called Global Soft has taken
over the word. Only digitally music is allowed and all lived music has been
prohibited. The head of the Global Soft is Killer Queen, who is served by the
secret police. The current generation follows the digital music provided by
the Company and does not have knowledge about musical instruments. People
do not have names; they are called by an email address. Planet earth had
become a digital world ”
Killer Queen appears along with Secret Police holding a poster which states
“2314, ALL MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS BANNED”. INNUENDO song playing
in the background.
Scene II-Pop is being interregated by Khashoggi.
KHASHOGGI: You confess that you have read the secret histories?
POP: Yes. I have read them all.
KHASHOGGI: So then, what do you know of the past?
POP: Everything
KHASHOGGI: And the future?
1
POP: Only that there is hope
KHASHOGGI: There is no hope
POP: There is always hope. Hope is our birth right; no child was ever born
without it.
KHASHOGGI:
(in range) Then where is it! Where is this hope?!
POP:
Anyway the wind blows.
KHASHOGGI: What do you understand by the term “living rock”?
POP:
That salvation is to be found within the living rock . . . at the place of
champions and that a bright, bright star will show the way.
KHASHOGGI: This interrogation is over
Two secret police officers appear.
KHASHOGGI: Take this miserable creature to “The Seven Seas of Rhye”
(jail)
The two police officers take POP. He breaks into screams.
Scene III-“VIRTUAL HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATION DAY. 2350"
Ga Ga Kids appear. The kids explode into happy clappy celebration, they all
produce graduation mortar boards, they throw them in the air, cheering and
shouting. We hear an electronic voice making an announcement.
ELECTRONIC VOICE:
Students of Virtual High. School’s out! It’s summer
time! You’re almost grown! Get out there and have some fun.
The kids scream with delight and disperse in huge high spirits.
One kid is left . . .
A TEACHER enters, the classic nice, understanding teacher.
TEACHER: Aren’t you going to celebrate with the others?
GALILEO: (No reply, looks down, hopeless and upset)
2
TEACHER: Where does all this anger come from? Your life is just beginning
GALILEO: Good! The s-s-sooner it begins the sooner it’s over with.
TEACHER: You don’t really mean that.
GALILEO: Yes I do! I want to live fast, die young, and leave a beautiful
carbon based cellular residue!
TEACHER: But you have so much potential, you could get a job with any
division of Global Soft you choose. How about music programming?
GALILEO: I don’t want to program music! I want to make music. Real music.
My own music!
TEACHER: (Suddenly scared) Be quiet!
Now the Teacher’s manner changes, he checks that they are not being
overheard and then speaks in earnest.
TEACHER: Now listen to me WWW-Slash-Gordon-at-the- Jones-s-Dot-Com!
GALILEO: My name is Galileo Figaro!
TEACHER: Please be serious.
GALILEO: I want a name, not an E Mail address.
Now the Teacher is really scared, he checks frantically to ensure that they
are not being overheard.
TEACHER: Your name is your E Mail address. Besides which nobody is called
Galileo Figaro!
It’s nonsense! Where on Planet Earth did you come up with it?
GALILEO: I found it in a dream. I have dreams
you see. And I hear noises,
yelling, drumming, b-b-banging noises. And words, words drop into my head,
too many words, mixed-up, useless words. It scares me. I’m going slightly
mad . . .
TEACHER: Look, Gordon, you have to pull yourself together. Don’t you
understand how lucky you are? You live in a perfect world. What more could
you possibly want?
3
The TEACHER has nothing more to say, he leaves.
Galileo is left along. He
sings I WANT TO BREAK FREE.
POLICE HEADQUARTERS appears they look innocent and fresh but are
actually Nazis. GALILEO keeps singing. Galileo is surrounded by police, but
he does not realize it. A ray of light descends on him, it is a police laser cell,
he is immobilized and taken by the police.
Scene IV- Khashoggi meets Galileo and Scaramouche
Khashoggi walks on and inspects the frozen boy. He is accompanied by
another officer.
KHASHOGGI:
So, this boy wants to make . . . his own music?
OFFICER: Our sources tell us so. He believes that he hears it in his dreams.
KHASHOGGI: Is He aware that music other than that programmed by
GlobalSoft is illegal?
OFFICER: How could he not be aware?
KHASHOGGI: Are there any others in this years graduation? Or is he alone?
OFFICER: He’s alone, completely and tragically, but there is another, a girl.
OFFICER: (shouts and gives orders to another officer) Bring the girl at
once!
As the officer speaks, there appears SCARAMOUCHE (she is not called this
yet but we will refer to her as such to avoid confusion).
OFFICER: This is the girl Sir.
KHASHOGGI: (Looks at her up and down) Doesn’t your mum download you
anything decent to wear?
SCARAMOUCHE: (defiant)
I make my own fashion statements.
KHASHOGGI: You’re a disgrace to the Ga Ga Girls and Global Soft!
SCARAMOUCHE: I’m not a Ga Ga Girl and I’m not interested to be one! 4
KHASHOGGI: (Yelling) Lock her up with the other rebel!
The police officers take her.
SCARAMOUCHE: (screaming) No!! I just want to be myself!
As she enters the room she says to herself: I just need somebody to love.
Find me somebody to love!
They look at each other’s eyes and start singing SOMEBODY TO LOVE.
Scene V-Galileo and Scaramouche manage to scape
Right after the song finishes.
GALILEO: Hi, What’s your name? I’m Galileo.
SCARAMOUCHE: Galileo? Interesting name. I want a cool name like yours.
GALILEO: Well, I could help you with that. What about Scaramouche? Do
you like it?
SCARAMOUCHE: That’s perfect! I love it! Thank you. So, why are you
arrested?
GALILEO: Because I hear sounds in my head; words and sounds. I’m mad you
see.
SCARAMOUCHE: I was arrested because they don’t like the way I dress.
Because I don’t dress like the Ga Ga Girls.
GALILEO: You dress beautifully!
SCARAMOUCHE: They hate us because they’re scared of us; because we’re
different!
GALILEO: You’re right. We’re a threat. A virus on their hard drive and they
won’t give up until they’ve “control, alt, delete” us. . . double clicked.
SCARAMOUCHE: We got to scape!
GALILEO: Lets do it!
5
They manage to scape and run away without noticing Global soft had
implanted a chip in their brains.
Scene VI – Junk yard
(Bohemians Brit and Meat are gathering trash to try and make musical
instruments and are having a conversation. Brit is a believer in the Dreamer
who will fulfill the prophecy, and insists to the cynical Meat that it's the key
to bringing real music back into the world.)
Brit: So, what have we got? (MEAT drops a rucksack on the ground)
Meat: Not much. It's mainly plastics and hydrocarbons. But, we got a sheet
of tin that we can wobble. Some pebbles that make a nice rattle, and a
bottle we can blow across, and a piece of wire to twang.
Brit: Sweet, sweet music! If only we could find another bit of wood to bang
against the one we've got.
Meat: I think I've found a piece of wood right here!
Brit: Great! Now your job is to take this stuff back to the Heartbreak.
Meat: But Brit Brit: No. I travel alone. You know that. How can I do the things I have to do,
if all I'm thinking about is you?I'll be back - I always come back! And one
day, I'll bring the Dreamer with me.
Meat: Sometimes I think it's us that's dreaming. Perhaps the music really
did die.
Brit: The music is only sleeping! It's in a deep, deep sleep. It won't be me
that wakes it - but one day, I'll find the man who can. (They hear footsteps)
Hey, did you hear that?
Meat: I did. What is it?
Brit: Someone’s coming. Hide. (Meat and Brit hide behind a van. Galileo and
Scaramouche enter the scene and are confronted by Meat and Brit)
Meat: Let's get them!
6
(MEAT and BRIT run out from behind the van. BRIT grabs GALILEO and
shoves him against the side of the van. MEAT tries to grab SCARAMOUCHE
but has less success)
Meat: Tell me where'd your boyfriend get those words?
Scaramouche: What words?
Meat: He calls you Scaramouche! He's read the fragments, he knows the
holy texts!
Galileo:
about!
I don't know any holy texts, I don't know what you're talking
Brit: Long tall Sally! Honky-tonk woman! The words, man, the words from the
past!
Meat: You've seen the fragments - you've been to the Heartbreak Hotel!
You're a spy!
Brit: Who are you?
Galileo:
I don't know! Why do people keep asking me that? I am the
walrus! This is Major Tom to Ground Control. Can you hear the drums,
Fernando? I am the dancing queen!
Brit: Meat, I think we've found him! This dude's the one! He's the man!
Meat: I say he's a spy!
Brit: No! He's the Dreamer! The one we've been waiting for!
Meat: Then test him!
Brit: Mama, just killed a man, Put a gun against his head, Pulled my trigger,
now he's dead(BRIT points at GALILEO, who hesitates before continuing)
Galileo:
away
Mama, life had just begun,But now I've gone and thrown it all
Brit: He knows the text - but he's never read it! He's the man!
7
Meat: But what does it mean? Tell us! Who is Mama, who's been killed, why
has it all been thrown away?
Galileo:
I don't know!
Meat: We've been searching for the meaning all our lives!
Brit: You have to come with us.
Scaramouche:
killers!
Who says I want to go anywhere? These people could be
Brit: We are, baby! Killers, thrillers, and bizmillahs!
Meat: We're the resistance - the last hope! We are the bohemians And now
you have a choice. Are you ready to break free?
Brit: Do you want it all?
Meat: Are you ready to be champions!
Scaramouche: Nah, sounds a bit boring if you ask me. I'm joking, of course I
want to go!
Brit: Then understand this! If you come with us, if you join the bohemians,
there's no going back to GaGa land. You will be under pressure from the
secret police.
Scaramouche:
PRESSURE)
Sounds perfect. Let's go! (they all begin to sing UNDER
All: Pressure! Pushing down on me pressing down on you, no man ask for
Under pressure
Galileo:
That brings a building down Splits a family in two
Scaramouche:
Puts people on streets, Um ba ba be, Um ba ba be
Brit: De day oh Ee day oh
Meat: That's okay
Galileo:
It's the terror of knowing what this world is about.
8
Scaramouche:
Watching some good friends screaming
All: Let me out!
Galileo:
Pray tomorrow gets me higher
All: Pressure on people, people on streets
Brit: Day day de mm hm Da da da ba ba
Meat: Okay
Scaramouche:
Chippin' around - kick my brains around the floor.These
are the days it never rains but it pours. Ee do ba be, Ee da ba ba ba, Um bo
bo, Be lap, People on streets - ee da de da de,People on streets - ee da de da
de da de da
It's the terror of knowing, What this world is about,Watching some good
friends screaming
All:
Let me out!
Galileo:
Pray tomorrow gets me higher and higher
Scaramouche:
Pressure on people, people on streets
All: Turned away from it all like a blind man
Sat on a fence but it don't work
Brit: Keep coming up with love but it's all slashed and torn
Meat: Why - why - why?
(they leap off the gurneys, push them off stage, and rip the bandages from
their heads)
Love love love love
Galileo:
Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking
Scaramouche:
Can't we give ourselves one more chance
Meat: Why can't we give love that one more chance
9
Brit: Why can't we give love, give love, give love, give love, Give love, give
love, give love, give love, give love
Galileo:
All:
'Cause love's such an old-fashioned word
And love dares you to care for The people on the edge of the night
(they are now at opposite sides of the stage. They turn and start to walk
towards each other)
And loves dares you to change our way, Of caring about ourselves, This is our
last chance, this is our last dance
Brit: This is ourselves
Scaramouche:
Under pressure
All: Under pressure
(standing face to face, they almost kiss but turn away at the last moment)
Pressure
Scene VII – Heartbreak Hotel
(Brit and Meat bring Galileo and Scaramouche to the Heartbreak Hotel,
which is located at the ruins of the Tottenham Court Road tube station,
where the Bohemians have made their home. The Bohemians explain that
they take their names after singers long gone, and mourn the deaths of
those who died young.)
Brit: Welcome to the Heartbreak Hotel!
(The Heartbreak Hotel turns out to be the old, broken down Tottenham
Court Road tube station. Other BOHEMIANS come on stage)
Big Macca: Who're these two, Brit?
Brit: I think I've found him. The one we've been waiting for.
10
Big Macca: The Dreamer? Just because he has a leather jacket does not
make him the wild one. Looks like a clone from the 'zone to me.
Brit: He calls himself Galileo.
Big Macca: Galileo? Then he must have seen the texts! He's a spy!
Meat: That's what I said!
(BOHEMIANS head towards GALILEO, in a threatening manner)
Brit: Look, anyone who wants to kill the dude has to come past me!
(the BOHEMIANS are suitably scared, and back off)
He hasn't seen the texts. How could he? We guard them with our lives!
Meat: He says he dreams the words.
Brit: He calls the chick Scaramouche.
(Suddenly Khashoggi and his police arrive at the Heartbreak Hotel, where
they round up the Bohemians for capture. Brit breaks free and battles the
police in order to enable Galileo and Scaramouche to escape, but in the
process is killed.)
Khashoggi: Oh yeah indeed. So finally I'm checking into the Heartbreak
Hotel. So, Mr McCartney, I say hello, and you say goodbye…
Brit: No! You'll never take the Dreamer while I'm alive!
(They begin to all fight. The COPs take the BOHEMIANS off, and fight
BRIT, who collapses to the floor. Lights out, safety curtain down, house
lights up for the interval)
Scene VIII
(Scaramouche and Galileo have escaped and soon realise that bugs were
placed in their heads.)
Galileo:
How did Khashoggi find the Heartbreak Hotel?
Scaramouche:
He must have some way of tracking us!
11
Galileo:
The hospital! When they operated on our heads! (he peers at
SCARAMOUCHE's hair) I think I've found something!
(SCARAMOUCHE produces a penknife and hands it to him)
Scaramouche:
Galileo:
Cut it out!
What?
Scaramouche:
Gazza, if there are bugs in our heads, then the police will
track us down in hours! Cut it out.
(he does)
Galileo:
He's had us from the start! He's heard everything!
(SCARAMOUCHE takes the bug from him and talks into it)
Scene IX – Global Soft Headquarters
(Back at Globalsoft headquarters Khashoggi reports that the Bohemians are
no longer a problem. Killer Queen prematurely starts to celebrate)
Khashoggi: Ma'am, I bring splendid news! My officers have been successful
in breaking up the bohemian stronghold! The Heartbreak Hotel is destroyed!
Killer Queen: But Khashoggi - this is wonderful! Incredible! A triumph! The
resistance is vanquished! We've won!
(Killer Queen sings DON’T STOP ME NOW)
SCENE X At The Bar
( As Galileo & Scaramouche run and they discover Pop. Who was questioned
in the first scene (he is a barman), he polishes glasses and sings SAVE ME
very sadly.)
POP: It started off so well… (SAVE ME the song plays softly in the
background)
(Bunch of old hippies drink in the background and sing in low tone—low lights)
POP: Each night I cry and still believe the lie. Freedom, I miss you till I die.
(The bar is surrounded by natural beauty, mountains are seen thru the (12)
window and a big lake. Big Macca, Aretha, Madonna, etc are sitting at the
table looking lost…Galileo & Scaramouche enter & see their friends and
cheer up the room).
GALILEO: Big Macca, Madonna, Aretha! So good to see you all!
SCARAMOUCHE: How did you guys escape?
GALILEO: This is awesome! The Bohemians are back & the fight still
prevails! But their friends are zombies now! (Imitate one while saying this)
BIG MACCA: Do I know you dude?
GALILEO: WHAT?
BIG MACCA: I said…Do I know you?
GALILEO: Its me Big Macca…the dreamer, the man, Galileo Figaro
BIG MACCA: You got any loot, paper, benjis, heavyweights? You know
“CACCHING!!” Cash Money Cream homie.
GALILEO: Well, not much
BIG MACCA: Enough to buy us some brewskies?
GALILEO: Well, maybe but…. (POP sticks his 2 cents)
POP: Your friends aren’t there dude, their bodies are here but their spirits
are long gone, they’ve been processed brother. (GALILEO & SCARAMOUCHE
go to the baR)
GALILEO: What do you mean?
POP: This is where they all come back, the guys & chicks who tried to break
on thru to the other side and failed. The 7 Seas of Rye, like Rye whiskey
dude, the last of those who have rocked.
GALILEO: Jack? As in Jack Daniels? Sure, Ill get some
SCARAMOUCHE: Ill buy my own thanks. (POP puts a bottle of whiskey on
the table)
SCARAMOUCHE: Why do they even come here?
POP: You mean apart from getting royally ticked off?
SCARAMOUCHE: Yes.
POP: They go with the flow toots.
SCARAMOUCHE: Toots?
POP: Theres something about this place, its like a spirit is here, before
global warming, the lake was much smaller.
SCARAMOUCHE: So who are you?
POP: I was a librarian my dear Femme.
SCARAMOUCHE: dear femme??
POP: They tried processing me because I knew too much and they couldn’t
zap it all. I might be a little screwy but Im all there when it comes to the 7
Seas. That’s why Im the barman!
13
SCARAMOUCHE: Do you remember something of what we read? Of the
secret history?
POP: I remember one story, the story I was reading when I was arrested,
this is why they arrested me…for reading! A story so powerful that couldn’t
be erased from my brain…want to hear it?
SCARAMOUCHE: No, I thought we´d just have a quick drink…(In a different
tone) Of course we want to hear it you old fart!!
POP: That’s one bad ass chick, shes on fire!
GALILEO: Actually, shes not my chick…yet
POP: Lucky you I bet
GALILEO: Perhaps, you can tell us your story Mr…..Ummmmm…..
POP: Pop, they call me Pop
GALILEO: Wed love to hear it (The lights dim AT the bar except on POP,
GALILEO & SCARAMOUCHE---solo from WE WILL ROCK YOU BEGINGS
TO PLAY)
SCENE XI
POP: Well, it seems that long ago, in the first decade of the 20th century,
there were those who predicted the nightmare that was to come. This was
at the very beginning of the musical conglomeration. A time for boy bands,
girl bands…and boy & girl bands…girl bands with a couple of boys that looked
like girls and boys who left boy bands just to become just boys and girls who
were in girl bands but were nothingless doing stuff as solo girls and
sometimes doing duets with solo boys and…..
SCARAMOUCHE: OK OK I get it. They called them bands but they werent
bands at all, they were just pretty faces with multi-tracked voices
GALILEO: Its been that way ever since. (POP SHOWS SOMETHING TO
GALILEO)
POP: Check this out, I stole it one day when I was captured (POP shows an
old movie projector). Its only a bit, but that’s all that’s left of a much longer
message that was handed down to us.
(This is a BIG MOMENT. Pop starts the projector and we see WE WILL
ROCK YOU (MUTED) playing on the screen, with 4 faCES OF Killer Queen
singing. The video is damaged and flickering)
<< KILLER QUEEN SINGS WE WILL ROCK YOU UNTIL “GONNA BE A BIG
MAN SOME DAY” >>
POP: Those young men singing to us from 3 centuries ago were members of a
rock freedom fighter collective called QUEEN and even then, they knew
that reality was quickly becoming someone elses fantasy.
14
(Pop plays the beginning of the old video again, (SONG:: You got mud on your
face big disgrace waving your flag all over the place (stop) QUEEN appears
in the image…
GALILEO: A fantasy created by computers of the global economy!
POP: EXACTLY! (Pop continues to play the video)
<< QUEEN VIDEO: CAUGHT IN A LANDSLIDE , NO ESCAPE FROM
REALITY>> ***just this clip of the song!!***
POP: They saw ahead of us, they knew life would just lead us to be
intravenously fed by the internet. Stuck in a Coca-Cola world and THAT
there would be NO escape from reality. I think Galileos getting it, hes
catching on!
GALILEO: The reality is that the human race was living out some kind of
software manufacturers dream and all cultures were becoming stale. The
kids want out of the loop!
POP: That’s right…All Queen wanted us to do is….(Pop plays more of the
video…”Look up to the sky and see” )
(Theres is a hush “SSHHHHH” and even the Zombies at the table are
curious)
SCARAMOUCHE: So what does this mean? Holy moly, this sounds like a load
of….
POP: No way lady, this word is bond…the truth. If we only knew the rest of
the song.
GALILEO: I think I know some of it, tell me ol wise one…what does
“BISMILLAH” mean?..we will not let you go-let me go. No no no no no no
Mamma mia. Beelzebub has a devil but aside for me???
POP: (THINKS FOR A MOMENT) Come to think about it, that’s a crock of…..
GALILEO: Oh right! (Says this very consecutively)
But having issued their warning, and having spent 9 weeks on the charts as
#1 when one actually had to sell records to be #1…Queen decided to fight
back!
(The music of BOHEMIAN RAHPSODY plays as Pop tells his story. You see 4
silhouettes appear (QUEEN))
POP: In order to protect rock n roll, Queen decided to bury their finest
instruments knowing there was going to be none in the future. In a time
where kids would have no weapons to fight the battle for their own souls
( Music plays on, 4 silhouettes are in a funeral ceremony burying a guitar)
GALILEO: You mean real instruments still exist?? RADICAL!! (imitates bill n
ted air guitar)
15
POP: Yes! But they’ve been lost for 300 yrs. Queen meant “deep” to protect
the precious weapons of our freedom”!
(4 silhouettes start chanting a spell)
POP: Could it be you’re the “chosen one”?
GALILEO: but what happened to Queen?
POP: Let me explain..
(In the background, Freddy Mercury figure salutes the sky and disappears,
and POLICE arrest the 3 other silhouettes)
POP: it is said to be the baddest of the gang, a dude named Bryan was
granted a final wish before being fried (acts out getting electrocuted) he
asked to play one more riff on the guitar
(we see silhouette of BRYAN playing a guitar solo in the background
surrounded by cops)
POP: therefore he delayed his execution by 3 and a half days
(Cops disappear into the backdrop, music ends and scene goes back to the
bar. Pop stares hard at GALILEO)
POP: where are the instruments Galileo Figaro??
GALILEO: Me? Like I know..duh??? a couple of weeks I was a virtual HS
drop out. Why would the rock gods choose me!!?
POP: because you’re the dreamer…..(poses like an airplane)
GALILEO: I have searched enough, and I have bored Scaramouche to death
with this
SCARAMOUCHE: you know it like a poet chum
GALILEO: I just don’t know Pop, there seems to be no hope in sight. The
holy axe will never be found and the lost riff will be lost forever
( brief pause and Pop jumps up in excitement with an idea)
POP: That´ll be 12 trillion dollars please!
SCARAMOUCHE: What??
POP: For the 2 shots
SCARAMOUCHE: Oh , right
SCENE XII
(water noise splashing can be heard, the 7 Seas are shaking)
SCARAMOUCHE: Whats happening?
POP: don’t sweat it toots, they are draining the lake, trying to redo natures
balance, not good. Its almost to its original level
(GALILEO sees something in the distance)
GALILEO: Look! Look! What is THAT? Who is this? Who does this
represent?
16
(everyone turns around, even the Zombies…look at this in an extraordinary
way)
(Statue of Mercury rises up and we are the champions plays in the
background)
POP: I know this man, many images in the secret history, he is one of the
freedom fighters of Queen and the 1st to die, the brightest star of all time.
Now the ball is dropping on Scaramouche.
SCARAMOUCHE: Star! Big star! Gazza, your dream. It will show you the way,
the star isn’t a star in the sky but a rock star!
POP: Far out man
GALILEO: but what is he trying to tell us?
SCARAMOUCHE: the way man! The way to the living rock. Its not granite or
quartz at all , its music!
GALILEO: Queen buried the instruments here? How can they bury it in
music? It this where the champions played?
POP: Yes, the place of champions, the old stadium. Machines may have
destroyed the stands and the rafters but they cant destroy the vibe of EL
CAMPIN!
SCARAMOUCHE: Galileo, we have to dip! No time to lose!!
GALILEO: we need a ride, and quick (a motorcycle appears)
GALILEO: forget that! We have to save rock n roll
POP: Take my ride, I don’t use it much any more..Galileo is that rebel and
Scaramouche is that chick for this mission!
SCARAMOUCHE: Yeah…right ( says this sarcastically, eyes rolling not
caring)
POP: lets ride!!
SCARAMOUCHE: Come on!
GALILEO: Scaramouche, before we ride, I have to tell you something….I love
you, I love you with all my heart..Ive missed you sooo much. Like fish need
water, like trees need the forest
SCARAMOUCHE: (gets all giddy and rocks side to side) Oh Gazza Fizza 
POP: sweet words
GALILEO: you have to come back to me, Im sorry …I got drunk and kissed
Meatloaf
POP: sweet deal! He must be more than 300 yrs old (Galileo turns to Pop)
GALILEO: Meat is a Bohemian rebel, a friend of ours
POP: Oh…hmmm
17
GALILEO: Im sorry Scara, I don’t know how it happened. Im sorry. I love
you. I was out of my mind
SCARAMOUCHE: Its alright Gazz, im not mad. I just wanted to see you
suffer. I forgive you (hugs him)
POP: wow! You lucked out…lucky duck
SCARAMOUCHE: besides, I have to confess something…I kissed her too
GALILEO: you kissed Meatloaf?
SCARAMOUCHE: yes
POP: Holy smokes batman! Like katy perrys song I kissed a girl??! Details
please…
GALILEO: but..but…when??
SCARAMOUCHE: the 1st time we went to the hotel, when we swapped
clothes
POP: Always wanted to see this (all smiley and hopping around)
SCARAMOUCHE: quite weird but wont do it again, just wanted to see what it
was like.
POP: well blow me down, that sure is rock n roll to me (popeye way)
SCARAMOUCHE: which is what she said
OP: you didn’t take any pictures??
SCARANMOUCHE: simmer down hot dog
POP: message received and understood toots
SCARAMOUCHE: now that we´re all confessing things…time to save the
kids!
GALILEO: Scara, what do you think about us?
SCARAMOUCHE: you mean monogamy?
GALILEO: Yeah…why?
POP: that bites (GALILEO takes SCARA´s hand)
SCARAMOUCHE: Ohh..why not. (says this doubtful but affirming—they kiss)
POP: Kids today..you just cant understand them
GALILEO: I love you Scaramouche!!
( They hug and lights dim….30 second pause, lights brighten up again)
GALILEO: Time to save the kids! (says it like Superman pointing to the sky)
POP: Im goinn´wait for me! (to SCARAMOUCHE)
SCARAMOUCHE: you hop on the back!
POP: OK, but don’t blame me for the cellphone in my pocket (says this
sarcastically and evil, raising eyebrows up and down)
SCENE XIII
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(POP, GALILEO & SCARAMOUCHE hop on a motorcycle and lights dim--motorcycle sound riding off)
(scene appears again and the riders arrive to EL CAMPIN, dark, alone and
cold, rain fall sound—GALILEO looks sad with head down)
GALILEO: wow, nothing at all huh?
POP: bummer
GALILEO: no instruments, not even any rock, just rubble. This place was
destroyed centuries ago, this aint no place of champions I reckon. I´ve
failed my chick, don’t know where the golden axe is, I´ll never get to rock
out my riffs and my dreams will never have come true (sad tone)
(GALILEO starts to sing a few lines of BOHEMIAN RAPHSODY: too late my
time has come “hasta” **gotta leave it all behind to face the truth)**
SCARAMOUCHE: I know why you cant find the guitar Galileo Figaro, or
maybe I should call you Mr. Alphabet. What did Pop say? “Queen struck deep
and pricey to protect the instruments from those not worthy of playing
them
GALILEO: You mean me?
POP: OUCH
SCARAMOUCHE: What do you think the Mighty Queen died for? And you
want to be a rockstar? God, you weren’t even worth my kiss!
POP: strong words from a riley chick
GALILEO: but the instruments? Theyre not here
SCARAMOUCHE: then we´ll have to make music without any instruments,
like it was in the beginning, right Pop?
POP: Yes my golden child
GALILEO: your right, I don’t need help from the past and I don’t need
second hand instruments to free the kids. I can do this myself and make my
own music. Human music, not machine made. I will do it out of love and fun
and if they kill me for this…so be it.
(both POP and SCARA are enthused)
SCARAMOUCHE: I love you Galileo Figaro
GALILEO: well, that all the inspiration I need!
POP. Oh how sweet.
SCENE XIV
(drums start beating and BOHEMIAN RAPHSODY OPENS)
SCARAMOUCHE. Listen! What´s that?
GALILEO: it’s the beat Scara
SCARAMOUCHE: the beating of our hearts?
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GALILEO: that’s right, hearts of solid rock
(Galileo and Scaramouche and Pop start singing BOHEMIAN RAPHSODY as
if they were competing)
Oh MAMA MIA MAMA MIA….
GALILEO and SCARAMOUCHE: wow this is magic!! (guitar riff from
BOHEMIAN RAPHSODY is played, a guitar emerges from the rubble in EL
CAMPIN…smoke screen)
GALILEO: Scaramouche…look, an instrument! A real instrument!
SCARAMOUCHE. So they DO exist after all!
VOICE OF ELVIS: (thunders from above in a southern tone) galileo, galileo,
boy…this is the king, the king of rock n roll speaking to you from beyond. Its
time boy, pull the guitar from the mighty stone. The power runs thru you
from the Queen , not me the king for the biggity bad one has sent you to
save rock n roll, so use it well son..you too Scaramouche…well, im going back
home to graceland Memphis Tennessee..bye bye now..uh huh! (voice fades,
Galileo in awe)
SCARAMOUCHE: you heard the king Gaz…grab it now and lets get the rock
out of here!
GALILEO: YEAH!
(Galileo takes the guitar by the neck and riff changes to ANOTHER ONE
BITES THE DUST, killer queen enters with the police)
Killer QUEEN: I think not missy. At last I have found the lost guitar. The
last one on earth, the most powerful weapon of freedom known to mankind.
Seize that electric guitar!
(2 cops run forward and grab the guitar, the air fills with guitar riffs, the
guitar itself is speaking. Thunder and lightning are seen)
POP: thunderbolt and lightning alright…very very frightening indeed
(guitar is now back in the stone and cops are trying to loosen it up but they
cant)
KILLER QUEEN: bring me the axe!
COP: it wont move maám
KQ: pull the axe out with the tank (tie rope around the guitar and sound of
an army tank is heard trying to pull out the guitar…Galileo enters and looks
strong and in charge)
GALILEO: stand back pigs, nobody but the chosen one will play the axe
(Galileo takes the guitar out of the stone)
SCARAMOUCHE: your my guitar hero! ( POP makes Nintendo gesture with
cheesy smile and thumbs up the crowd)
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GALILEO. Yes I am baby! Now, lets rock (he tries to play but it sounds like
complete crap)
POP. Oh wow, modern jazz!
SCARAMOUCHE. Give me that! (Scara takes the guitar and starts to crunch
out some mean chords and riffs)
(cops step back, stage fills up with GAGA kids and killer queen is horrified)
KQ: no no no…what the heck are you meddling kids doing? You should be in
school!
GALILEO: schools out lady
KHASSHOGI: Ma´am have you heard the music?
KQ: of course I hear it, its making my ears bleed, seize them, seize them!
KHASSHOGI: no way babe
KQ: babe?
KHASSHOGI: I really dig this funky beat thing and Im going to shake my
money maker
KQ: pardon me??
KHASSHOGI: I must explain, I went thru this mind altering experience just
recently and Im no longer myself and personally, I like it this way
KQ: you and the other police officers do your duty!
(cops start looking at each other like NO WAY)
COP: forget it lady, this is a dope sound
COP 2: this kid rocks homeslice!
COP 3: I want to make love not war
KHASSHOGI: and Im going home now to puke on my dad´s stereo
KQ: NO!!
POP: Face it killer queen, your sons and daughters are useless and times are
changing
(thunder n lightning appear, drummer starts playing mean beats and drum set
rises from behind)
SCARAMOUCHE. The instruments are returning!
POP: the blonde is one´s drum ( a bass guitar appears)
POP: a bass and a microphone…alright!!..the main man Mike
GALILEO: are we worthy??
(Bohemians emerge, Big Macca, Aretha, etc)
BIG MACCA: reborn in rock…awesome!! The raphsody is upon us
(BRITNEY AND MEATLOAF APPEAR)
GALILEO: Britney, your alive!
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BRITNEY: didn’t you hear? We are all reborn. Reborn in rock..and FYI..if you
ever kiss my old lady again, I´ll lay down the smackdown on your candy ass
MEAT: aww, he´s such a cave man (in love)
(Britney gets on the drums, Meat grabs the bass, Galileo starts to sing,
stage is full. GAGA kids, cops and extras dance and tear off their clothes)
GALILEO and SCARMAOUCHE: ( Ask the crowd to join and sing BOHEMIAN
PAHSODY- start singing and crowd to join in )
KQ: (pulls Galileo off stage) Umm.. Galileo, obviously this rock this is going to
be big, you just cant give it away silly! Do you really want to give it out for
free?
SCARAMOUCHE: (calls out to Galileo) hey Gazz, you ready to rock or what??
GALILEO: look killer queen, I`m a bit busy right now
KQ: OKOK, I´ll leave you my card just in case, hit me up some time
GALILEO: yo, you got to be kidding me……
(BOEHMIAN RAPHSODY starts playing and close)
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