Narrative Summary
Interview with Kathy High by Katy Rogers
Kathy High has just come home from her Sunday morning church service and settled into
her favorite chair by a row of picture windows in her living room. Her long hair hangs loose and
free about her shoulders, echoing back to the time of her youth in the 1960s. Her house is a
reflective collage of changes that have occurred in her life, from pictures of her children and
grandchildren, to the display of Bible verses and various Christian sayings.
When I asked about her religious experience as a child, she paints a picture that is typical
of what most people think of a Midwestern, Christian upbringing. She recalls her mother taking
her and her older brothers to church and sitting next to her during the service. She admits when
she got saved at seven years old that she was not sure how to integrate God into her life. She
thought of God as an idea rather than someone who would be there when she needed him.
Her teen years fell in the 1960s when change was all around. Attitudes towards authority
and religion were evolving into different ideas, and Kathy went through many phases in her
spiritual life. She went from being an agnostic to a Wiccan, and for a while, was an atheist. She
confesses through all of it she believed there was a God, but in her stubborn youth, she did not
seem to remember he was there to help her. She believes most of her interest in these different
faiths can be traced back to the hippie culture she was living in, and the heavy drug use that went
on during that time.
When she became the mother of three boys, Kathy re-entered church and dedicated her
children to God. Even then, however, she talked about her faith in God as being strong, yet her
actions as a Christian were not reflective of her religious beliefs. Her friends would come by
after church services, and they would drink and get high together. Sundays would roll around
again and Kathy would go back to church, never realizing that her activities outside the sanctuary
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were against all that she heard about in church. For her, there was still a big gap in her spiritual
life. It was not until she was arrested with her former boyfriend for drug use that her relationship
with God became a permanent, strong bond. She remembers sitting in her jail cell and knowing
she was in serious trouble. She knew if she got out of jail she would return to drugs. While she
prayed every day, she knew she could not promise God that if he got her out of jail she would
not do drugs; he would know she was lying. So for eight days, she sat and came to terms with
this. She was then able to honestly tell him that she would not go back to drugs and she would
change.
A time she recalls her faith being tested was when her youngest son’s children were taken
by their mother into Arkansas. Kathy had been helping him raise them for many months while
their mother recouped from drug use. The children’s mother came, for what was supposed to be a
visit, and took them away without letting either Kathy or her son know where she was going.
Kathy was angry because the young woman only seemed interested in having the children
around so she would receive government assistance. So Kathy began to ask God to punish the
young woman.
Somewhere along the way, Kathy realized that she needed to forgive the children’s
mother for her actions. She had to understand that the young woman was focusing solely on
herself, rather than what she was doing to the children, Kathy, and her son. Kathy reflected on
Christ’s plea for mercy for the human race as he was raised on the cross; she then prayed that
God would forgive this girl for her mistakes. Two days later, the young lady called, and Kathy
got to see the children again. This moment above all has made Kathy a believer in the power of
prayer.
Kathy describes her path to faith as a rocky road. She contributes much of it to drugs and
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bad relationships with her mother and various men. Her childhood was one of turmoil; she grew
up in a poor household and had to wear homemade clothes. The kids at school made fun of her
because she was not always clean. She said she developed a hard shell, and would tell herself
that everything was okay even though it was not. It was not until she got away from men and
drugs that she was able to break out of this shell and grow.
Like all mothers, Kathy wants her children to practice her faith. Two out of three of her
children do; however, her middle son is a practicing Wiccan, which she admits bothers her.
Though her son talks to her about his faith and tries to explain what it does for him, she believes
she knows why he has chosen it. She feels that Wicca is the first place her son feels he fits. For
her it was drugs, and for him it is this faith.
A serious problem she sees within the Christian faith is the tendency for practitioners to
pass judgment on each other. There are events in Kathy’s own life she would not dream of telling
her congregation or friends at work. Though she blames some of it on her own trust issues, most
of it comes from her past experiences with the church and from what she sees some Christians do
today. People would look down on her for the clothes she wore or tattoos she has. Even today,
she hides them for fear of any disapproval. Though she loves her faith, she wishes this was an
aspect that would disappear completely.
Her parting advice about faith is that all people are on a spiritual journey and are at
different levels within their travel. She says if you are 50 years old and a baby in Christ that is
okay because you will grow. Remember when you ask yourself what Jesus would do, that above
all he would be kind, loving, forgiving, and nonjudgmental. She believes if people do that, then
they will be a lot happier.
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