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Christine McDonald
Professor Rex
English 204
October 7th, 2013
A Common Method
Child molesters and pedophiles use control as their main tactic to victimize the young
children they choose to become physical with. In Malcolm Gladwell’s article In Plain View, it is
discussed how child molesters are able to get away with their actions, not only because of their
particular control over the children, but the community itself. Researching the subject of control
further, I found it to be the umbrella method of how child molesters not only gain authority over
their victims, using manipulation, threatening, position of authority, seeking of a child’s
vulnerability, and seduction of a child as variations of control over their victims, but also gain
power over the adults they interact with on a daily basis through different, but similarly deceptive
means. The predators often exercise their control over the communities they live in, influencing
and sculpting their environment and how they themselves are portrayed to the parents of future
and current victims, coworkers and friends.
After sifting through articles and books written about child molestation and pedophiles, I
found some authors to be, understandably, biased. Biased, either in their so-called “findings”, or
that most, if not all offenders are men and that the victims chosen are either just one gender
verses the other, whichever opinion the author favors. But in the text Child Molesters: A
Behavioral Analysis, written by a retired special agent of the FBI, Kenneth V. Lanning, who has
profiled child molesters for many years, explains that he and other agents of the law concerning
child crimes learned that a biased opinion doesn’t necessarily help the victim or assist in catching
the perpetrator. “For the purposes of this publication a child molester will be defined as a
significantly older individual who engages in any type of sexual activity with individuals legally
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defined as children” (Lanning 18), this description is what I have found to be, the most objective
and simplest definition of what a child molester is. Instead of trying to narrow the scope to just
men or women, or what is thought to be worse or more common, this modest classification is the
right one to keep in mind when researching and reading about the subject of child molestation and
pedophiles.
There is a certain common process for the child molester who intends not to be caught by
parents or authorities, all revolving around controlling the child, usually one who is an easy target
and maybe not a first time victim. Author and licensed clinical psychologist Carla Van Dam,
discovered through her research and dialogues with practiced child molesters, the general process
and patterns of an adult who sought out their child victims, “…(1) identifies a vulnerable child,
(2) then engages that child in peer-like involvement, (3) desensitizes the child to touch, (4)
isolates the child and (5) makes the child feel responsible” (Harms and van Dam, 1992) (Van
Dam 104). Vulnerability makes a child easier to manipulate, to threaten, to strike fear into and
groom to tremble beneath the control of a child molester. Grooming, as defined by Kenneth V.
Lanning, is when an adult who is seeking to molest a child, most likely not for the first time,
grooms the child into “cooperation” and “seduces the child” using methods that would attract the
interest of the gender and age group the pedophile preferred (Lanning 27). When grooming the
victim, the future abuser works on normalizing touch, making it a regular and comfortable
practice, then assuring the physical contact gradually moves from innocent to inappropriate. The
entire grooming process doesn’t happen overnight, and the longer and more thought out the
process of grooming is, the more time a child abuser has to avoid scrutiny or discovery. A certain
amount of trust must be gained from the child and the parents by the child abuser, before the
molestation itself can progress fully and without much limitation. If a predator seeking his or her
prey found a child to be more shy, or have problems at home or seemingly lacking in attention
and open, a child molester would find said youth a suitable one to begin grooming. In an
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interview with a child molester, Van Dam quotes his tactic, “I would choose the youngest one, or
the one whom I thought would not talk about it…I would probably pick the one who appeared
more needy, the child hanging back from others or feeling picked on by brothers or sisters…The
one who likes attention and stroking” (Van Dam 104-105). Also, I read in Malcolm Gladwell’s
article In Plain View, it’s mentioned again that vulnerability is essential in selecting a victim,
“The successful pedophile does not select his targets arbitrarily. He culls them from a larger pool,
testing and probing until he finds the most vulnerable” (Gladwell 2012). Vulnerability goes hand
in hand with control because being vulnerable means to be open to harm instead of having a
strong, unsusceptible reaction to the seduction and ultimately the control of a child molester.
Without that vulnerability, the child molester would have a much higher probability of being
caught if the children sought out their parents help immediately, or would reject the predators
attempts at control entirely. Whereas a submissive and compliant child is more easily oppressed
and controlled, whether from lack of attention somewhere in their life, controlling parents at
home, a difficult home situation or a problematic past, the hopeful child molester seeks the
pliable youth out, in order to find the right kind of child to control.
Angry and rage filled child molesters and child rapists are said to be far less common,
nonetheless intimidation and threatening of a child scares and convinces the victim that the adult
predator has the ability to harm. “…if the victim is there, if the victim is anywhere that you can
look at her and make her nervous or him, whichever one it might be, then the more nervous that
you make them, the more it makes them seem like they’re lying. If they’re around. Most of the
time they’re not. Q: How do you make them nervous? A: By staring at them. You know, it’s like,
I’m going to get you. I’m just, it’s just basically, you know, that kind of look…”(Salter 49). The
background behind this excerpt is when a convicted child rapist is interviewed by Anna Salter,
although his fury is directed towards children, other child molesters have been known to make
threats of physical harm to the victim and their families.
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A child, often much more acquiescent than an adult, given the right circumstances and
background, is easily convinced and influenced to comply with the demands of their abuser but
are also made to feel complete responsibility for the acts, “Victims often assume their own
behavior to be responsible for the abuse, unaware of the gradual grooming that has taken place,
certain their silence implies guilt…Child molesters help to encourage this. So when the contact
turns into abuse, ‘Do they cry or fight off my advances? Usually not’” (Van Dam, 113).
Controlling their victim in yet another way, with their own guilt and shame that the abuser helps
to stimulate, most likely on a regular basis.
The term “grooming” can also be applied to the adults in the community of the child
molester in a different way, “A pedophile, van Dam’s story of Mr. Clay reminds us, is someone
adept not just at preying on children but at confusing, deceiving, and charming the adults
responsible for those children…Psychologists call this ‘grooming’—the process by which child
molesters ingratiate themselves into the communities they wish to exploit” (Gladwell 2012).
Controlling the reaction of a community with the establishment of a “nice-guy” reputation, often
long before any molestation or sexual abuse of a child takes place, helps elongate the time spent
undetected and allowed alone with children. Charming the parents and community is part of
being able to become close with children and being allowed to remain close to the children. The
“nice-guy” status a child molester has controlled and set up for themselves safeguards the
pedophile within the community, a community who usually ends up defending the child molester
even after accusations and discoveries of their child abuse are unearthed (Lanning 23).
Control is the blanket tactic of most recorded methods of child molesters acquiring what
they desire. All sub-tactics of child molesters fall into the category of control: manipulation,
threatening, using their position of authority, seeking of a child’s vulnerability, deceiving the
child into false responsibility and shame, and the seduction/grooming of a child. Controlling their
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entire situation, the everyday child molester can woo almost every adult in the local society into
their façade of good intentions. I guess you could say the common, yet proficient and skillful
pedophile, whom actively slips into communities and molests children for long periods of time, is
a bit of a control freak.
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Works Cited
Gladwell, Malcolm. "In Plain View." New York Times. N.p., 22 Sept. 2012. Web.
<http://gladwell.com/in-plain-view/>.
Lanning, Kenneth V. Child Molesters: A Behavioral Analysis. 4th ed. N.p.: National Center for
Missing & Exploited Children, 2001. Print.
Salter, Anna C. Predators: Pedophiles, Rapists, and Other Sex Offenders. New York, NY: Basic,
2003. Print.
Van Dam, Carla. Identifying Child Molesters: Preventing Child Sexual Abuse by Recognizing the
Patterns of the Offenders. 1st ed. New York [u.a.: Haworth Maltreatment
and Trauma, 2001. Print.