Sex from the Opposite View
AIM
To discuss in single gender groups, and to ask questions of the opposite sex.
To understand some of the gender differences in perceptions of sexuality and sexual
behaviour.
MATERIALS
Any copies of collected questions asked by boys about girls or by girls about boys over the
last few weeks – ensure that these questions are anonymised.
Postcards or small slips of paper and pens for each group.
ACTIVITY / METHOD
This session is a challenging one and is best suited to a group of young people who have
worked enthusiastically on the programme, have generated questions as you have gone
along, have an approximate gender and ability balance and are sufficiently mature to be able
to ask sensible questions of the opposite gender.
Preparation: collect questions boys have casually asked about girls’ sexuality, sexual
behaviour and questions girls may have asked about boys’ sexuality and sexual behaviour.
Or, prompt young people to think of questions they may want to ask the opposite sex about
their anatomy, sexuality and sexual behaviour and write these down on paper anonymously
and put them in a question box.
It will be important to ensure that questions and comments are anonymised and
depersonalised throughout the exercise.
Remember, too, that it is easy to marginalise some young people. Do not assume that
questions will necessarily be about heterosexual relationships, or even about sex.
This activity can be done in different ways. Descriptions of 2 methods are given here.
Are you Ready? 2014
Method 1
Explain the purpose of the session, and what you are going to ask every one to do. Divide the
group into single gender groups.
If possible, have girls and boys working in separate rooms, each with an educator, preferably
a man working with the boys and a woman working with the girls.
If the subgroups are large, you may need to break them down into two smaller groups for the
first stage of the exercise.
Give each group copies of any questions that have been asked by their gender over the last
few weeks. Have the group agree three questions (if they are working in two small groups,
you may need to limit them to two questions per group) they would like to ask of the opposite
gender – about sex and the associated feelings, thoughts, behaviours or values.
Have them written down clearly on slips of paper, and ensure that they are depersonalised
and about young women or young men in general. Decide who will ask them.
Bring the two groups back together. Have the girls and boys alternately responding to
questions asked by the opposite sex. It may be necessary to remind the group of the group
agreement and enforce active listening.
If you have time at the end of this session, it will be valuable to exchange questions and allow
some discussion by the opposite gender of their reactions to the questions.
OPTIONS / EXTENSIONS
Method 2
In Method 2, you might like to arrange the room as a ‘fishbowl’ if you have sufficient space –
two concentric circles of chairs all facing the same way, sufficient for everybody to sit down (if
you can’t do this, try to arrange the chairs in two equal-sized groups facing one another).
Bring the whole group back together, have one gender go in the fishbowl (the inner circle) first
while the other gender sits round the outer circle. Have those on the outer circle ask the first
question, and allow time for anybody who wishes to on the inner circle to respond.
Move on to the second and third questions in turn. Then reverse roles, with the other gender
going into the fishbowl. It is important that only those on the inner circle speak in response to
the question that questions and comments remain anonymous and depersonalised and that
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time is allotted equally to both genders. It may be necessary to remind the group of the group
agreement and enforce active listening.
Ending
Rearrange chairs to mix up boys and girls (one circle if possible) and end with a round of
‘One thing I found surprising/interesting in this session was…’ If the group is too big to do this
in the time available, have small mixed groups do it among themselves.
Are you Ready? 2014