Examples - Woodcliff Lake

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Steps for Writing an Essay
• Pre-Writing – Gathering material, doing your
thinking, pulling your research together
• Outlining – Using your pre-writing material to
create a structure for your piece
• Drafting – Turning the outline into an actual
written piece
• Revising – Revisiting and rethinking the
CONTENT of your piece (don’t worry about
grammar, etc. here)
• Editing – Fixing up the technical problems,
spelling, run-ons, etc. “Polishing”
• Publishing – Printing out your final piece –
sharing your work with others
The Plot Diagram/Sequence
Exposition – The main character is introduced, we see
him/her in the “before” stage – we learn about what regular
life is like for that character “before” the events of the book
start to unfold.
Rising Action – The problem is introduced and the events of
the book start to unfold. Tension builds and things start to
get worse and worse for the main character. There may be
small victories scattered in, but the problems keep coming.
Climax – The shortest moment in the book – It is often just a
quick moment. It is the point of greatest tension when things
have reached a crescendo and are as bad as they are going to
get. The moment the tension breaks the story moves into the
falling action.
Falling Action – The tension is broken and all the loose ends
start getting tidied up.
Resolution – We see the character in his/her “After” state.
He/She has changed, grown, and learned new things. We see
how this will now affect the character’s life.
The Hero’s Journey
In almost every young adult novel, the hero or main character
goes on a journey of change.
The journey is not always an actual journey – sometimes it is
an emotional journey.
At the end of the story, the hero has changed because of
whatever happened to him/her, and has learned something
new about him/herself.
Each hero’s journey has 5 stages.
These stages are different from the ones you see in a plot
diagram. Together with the 5 stages of plot, the 5 stages of a
hero’s journey make a very complete picture of a novel.
The Hero’s Journey
The 5 stages are:
1.Departure – The hero is called to adventure – most of the
time he/she does not want to go.
2.Initiation – The hero crosses some kind of a threshold and
steps into a new world where he/she must learn many new
things. Often during the initiation the hero will meet his/her
sage teacher and his/her special weapon will be revealed, if
not to the character then to the reader. The weapon can be
an object or an ability – The hero is not yet very good at using
it. Usually during the initiation the hero is also introduced to
or learns about the villain. The villain can be a person
(human or otherwise), an illness, or some kind of inner
struggle (I know I’m different but I don’t want to tell anyone
else about it.).
1.Road of Trials – The Road of Trials takes up the majority of
the book. On this road the hero faces many obstacles and
has to overcome each one. As he/she overcomes an
obstacle, he/she learns something new and moves closer to
coming into his/her full hero’s power. Often the hero is
accompanied on his/her road of trials by his/her
companion/sidekicks.
The Hero’s Journey
4. Innermost Cave – This is the hero’s lowest point –
although the cave represents the hero’s darkened mood,
an author will put the character in an actual dark place
like a basement or a forest. Inside the Innermost Cave,
the hero must struggle with his greatest fear or weakness
and overcome it. When the hero has overcome his/her
greatest struggle, he/she is ready to emerge from the
Innermost Cave. At this point, he/she is in his/her full
hero’s power and is capable of wielding the special
weapon with mastery. He/she will quickly move to the
climax of the story where he/she will face the villain.
4. Return and Reintegration - The hero has overcome the
final obstacle during the climax and the final
confrontation with the villain. He now returns to his life,
sometimes the old life, sometimes a new one, but is living
it as a changed person and in his full hero’s power.
In your writing journal:
Chart the hero’s journey and plot sequence for The Lightning
Thief.
***Hint – The initiation and departure are reversed!
The Important Parts of an Essay
• An essay can be thought of in 3 parts:
• Say what you’re going to say
• Say it
• Say what you said
• Lead
• Thesis Statement
• Claim
• Avenues
• Body Paragraphs
• Introduce the Example
• Example
• 3-part analysis
• Conclusion
• Transitions
The Thesis Statement
A thesis statement is the heart of your essay. It is the main
point that you want to make. Everything you write has to be
written with the thesis statement in mind.
A thesis statement is thoughtful and insightful. It is general, but
not boring or obvious.
Sample thesis statements:
Not so good:
In The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson, the main
character, changes in many ways.
Better:
In The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson, the main
character, learns a lot about who he really is.
Even better:
In The Lightning Thief by Rick Riorday, Percy Jackson, the main
character transforms from a troubled kid into a confident hero.
In your Writing Journal: Create a before and after chart with 6
-7 SPECIFIC examples from the text of how Percy changes.
Types of Literary Devices
FORESHADOWING – Hints given throughout the story
about what is going to happen later on.
FIGURATIVE LANGUAGE – There are several types of
figurative language that help to create an emotional
connection with the reader.
•Hyperbole – Exaggeration to emphasize a point. Example:
His legs were so long he had to drive from the back seat.
•Metaphor/Simile – comparison used to create emphasis
or description. Example: Her hair was a waterfall of silk
that cascaded down her back.
•Personification – giving something non-human human
qualities. Example: The wind brushed past and whispered
in my ear.
•Imagery – Painting a VISUAL picture in the mind of the
reader by being very descriptive. Imagery can contain other
types of figurative language.
In your writing journal – Find 2 examples of each type of
literary device. List the page number, the emotion attached
to the example, and discuss how it shows Percy’s change.
(Hint – You’ll have to find one that shows “before” and one
that shows “after”.
Thesis Claim: The way Percy changes in the book is
emphasized by theme and figurative language.
In your notebook:
Figurative Language: Hyperbole
- Example: On page 118 – “My shield was the size
of an NBA backboard with a big caduceus in the
middle. It weighed about a million pounds. I could
have snowboarded on it fine, but I hoped nobody
seriously expected me to run fast.”
This shows that Percy is still on the brink of change,
but not there yet. The emotion that is conveyed is
one of feeling overwhelmed and anxious. He feels so
small and unprepared for battle, even though it’s
just a game. We can see that even though he
sounds sarcastic, underneath he’s scared about
fitting in, and still has no confidence in himself or
his abilities.
Thesis Claim: The way Percy changes in the book is
emphasized by theme and figurative language.
In your journal:
P. 329 “I was holding back the tide by force of will,
but tension was building like carbonation behind a
cork.”
Emotion:
Analysis: (Write a paragraph discussing how the
figurative language above shows Percy’s change.)
Common Themes in Literature
Community/Isolation
Power over others/Power over self
Curiosity/Denial
Inner Truth
Coming of Age
Power of Love
In your writing journal – choose 2 of these themes and
discuss how they apply to The Lightning Thief. See the
example on the next page.
Thesis Claim: The way Percy changes in the book is
emphasized by theme and figurative language.
In your journal:
Pick 2 themes, find examples of them in the book,
write a short paragraph tying the example to the
thesis statement.
Example:
Theme: Community vs. Isolation
On page 127 Percy talks about how miserable he is
being alone in the Poseidon cabin. This emphasizes
his isolation and shows that he has not changed yet,
but he is about to. He has been isolated by his
status as a hero, but he hasn’t earned the title yet.
He has yet to find out that the isolation is all in his
mind and that the power of community will ultimately
be what helps him to complete his quest.
In The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson, the main character transforms from
a troubled kid into a confident hero and
this change can be seen in the book’s
theme
Figurative language.
The theme of community vs. isolation truly shows how Percy changes.
The Sandwich Strategy
The sandwich strategy is used with the examples in the body
paragraphs.
• Introduce the example
• Example
• Explain the example
Examples:
Before: The theme of Coming of Age shows how Percy
changes. One example of this is when Percy fights Aunty Em.
This shows that Percy hasn’t changed yet.
After: The theme of Coming of Age shows how Percy
changes. At the beginning of the book, Percy is less mature
and is not in his full hero’s power. An example of this is when
Percy fights Aunty Em. 1This scene shows that Percy hasn’t
changed yet because he fails to see her trap and then needs
the help of Annabeth and Grover to get out of it. 2Percy’s
immaturity causes him to ignore the red flags and Grover’s
worry and to concentrate only on the food. 3 He is not yet
wise enough to see the obvious danger he is in, and he is
therefore too slow to react.
A Good Analysis
The analysis piece in an essay is the most important part
because it ties your examples to the thesis. This part of
the essay is the “bottom bread” of the sandwich – the
part where you explain your example. A good analysis has
these qualities:
•Ties the example to the thesis by explaining why
•Is specific rather than general
•Shows insight
Examples:
Not So Good: One example is when Percy fights Crusty.
This scene shows that he has changed.
Better: One example is when Percy fights Crusty. This
scene shows that he has changed because he has become
a better and more confident fighter.
Even Better: We can see how far Percy has come on his
journey as a hero when he fights Crusty. He handles this
monster with confidence, using a combination of fighting
skills and cleverness to stay in control at all times. When
compared to the fight with Aunty Em, in which he was
confused and inept, the reader can see how much of a
hero Percy has truly become. This battle is the outcome
of all the practice he has had fighting other monsters and
it is clear that he has learned a great deal.
3 Points of Analysis
The bottom “bread” of your sandwich should be the thickest
of all. It ties your example to your topic statement and to
your thesis. In order to analyze your example in depth you
need to use at least 3 points of analysis
Prompts to consider using in the analysis section:
1.When compared to
2.In contrast to
3.If ______________ then ______________
4.This is the outcome of ___________________
5.Other possible outcomes of ________ might have
been ________________
6._________________occurred because__________
7.An explanation of ________is__________________
8.The way in which _________ occurs or is
accomplished is
9._____________ is like ______________ because
(metaphor)
We can see how far Percy has come on his journey as a hero when
he fights Crusty. . 8He handles Crusty with confidence, using a
combination of fighting skills and cleverness to stay in control at
all times. 1When compared to the fight with Aunty Em, in which
he was confused and inept, the reader can see how much of a
hero Percy has truly become. 4This battle is the outcome of all
the practice he has had fighting other monsters and it is clear that
he has learned a great deal.
In your outline: Use 3 points of analysis with one theme
example and one figurative language example.
Essay Lead
• Hooks the reader
• Relates to the topic, but often more indirectly
• In a literary essay the lead can give the reader an
overview of the story
• Should not be too short that it feels abrupt
• Should not be too long that it seems to take forever to
get to the point
A Good Lead in a Literary Essay Should:
•
Give the name and author of the book
•
Give the basics of the story – setting, time place, etc.
•
Broadly outline the main problem of the story
•
Mention the main character and possibly one or two others
•
Give the reader enough information to understand the analysis
that will follow, but don’t give too much away.
Revision Strategies
• Build Transitions
• Use Elaboration Strategies
• Use Strong Verbs
• Check Sentence Structures
• Read Alouds
Transitions
• 3 Parts to a transition
• Refer back to what you just talked about
• Refer forward to what you’re going to talk
about
• Linking idea
• Transitions can be used between sentences as the
first step in revision
• Go through each paragraph two sentences at
a time and build a transition sentence
between each pair.
• Re-read your paragraphs aloud.
• Add anything that feels unsaid
• Delete where you feel like you’ve overdone it
Elaboration Strategies
• Explain Why
• Explain Why Not
• Explain How
• Explain the Details
• Define
• Give an example
Using Powerful Verbs and Adjectives
(And Dropping Unnecessary Adverbs!)
Some verbs are better than others. When you revise:
•Go through your draft and underline all the verbs.
•Give them the “vanilla” test.
•If they are too vanilla, or if you are using adverbs to spice
them up, use a thesaurus to find a more “spicy” verb.
•Avoid using the same “spicy” verb twice.
Examples:
Not so good:
When the character goes to talk to his father, he feels
completely and totally angry.
Better
When the character confronts his father, he is enraged.
Not so good:
The character was using a good strategy, which is how the
reader can clearly and easily see his change.
Better:
The character was using a clever strategy, which is how
the reader can identify his transformation.
Fine-Tuning Sentences for Better Flow
Sentence structure affects the way the language of your
piece flows.
•
•
•
•
Read through the piece ALOUD to yourself
Read it through ALOUD to someone else
Have someone else read it ALOUD to you
Listen for:
• Short, choppy sentences
• Repetitious words or ideas
• Combine short sentences
• Delete or reword repetitious ideas or words
Examples:
Not So Good: Percy made Nancy Bobofit fall in the
fountain. He made her fall in the fountain because he was
immature and he didn’t know about his power.
Better: Percy caused Nancy Bobofit’s fall into the fountain
because he was immature and didn’t yet know about his
power.
Not So Good: The fight with Ares was the climax of the
story. Percy used the ocean to defeat Ares. Percy was in
his full power.
Better:
The fight with Ares was the climax of the story. Percy was
in his full power and was able to use his special weapon,
the ocean, to defeat the god of war.
Editing Basics
Verbs:
Agreement – Subjects and verbs.
Tense – Check each verb – are they all in the same tense?
Variety – Are you using the same verbs over and over
again?
Person – Does it switch anywhere from you to I, from I to they,
from you to they or he/she? Have you taken “I” out of it, as in
“I think”…
Word Variety – Are you using the same word over and over
again?
Sentence Structure – Are your sentences varied and not all the
same?
Spelling – Check for words the spell checker won’t pick up and
incorrect duplicates ie. Aloud/Allowed
Capitalization – Beginning of sentences, and proper nouns
Sentences – Check for run-ons and fragments.
Strategy:
•Read your piece backwards. This will help you find spelling
and technical errors.
•Read it aloud to a partner – have the partner read it aloud to
you.
Read-Alouds
Work with 1 or 2 other people.
Focus on one writer at a time.
First Writer reads his/her writing aloud while other
writer(s) listen.
Whenever something in the writing comes up that
needs to be addressed, whoever hears it
comments and the writer makes a note to change
it.
Do NOT focus on grammar and spelling – look past
it and think only about the CONTENT!
When the writer is finished reading his/her work
aloud, the other writer takes it and reads it aloud
for a SECOND time.
Whenever something comes up in the writing, stop
and let the writer make a note.
Repeat for the other writer(s)
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