Inter-Act,
th
13
Edition
Chapter 10:
Disclosure and
Privacy
1
Chapter Objectives
2
 Discuss the dialectic of disclosure and privacy
 Explain the theory of communication privacy




management (CPM)
List the factors that affect people’s disclosure and privacy
rules
Explain how disclosure and privacy affect relationships
Discuss the effects of technology on privacy boundaries
Describe how to give and ask for personal feedback, both
praise and constructive criticism
Self-Disclosure
Privacy
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Revealing
confidential or secret
information
Withholding
personal
information to
enhance
autonomy or
minimize
vulnerability
The Disclosure–Privacy Dialectic
4
The tension between sharing personal information
and keeping personal information confidential –
also called the openness and closedness dialectic;
each person has different expectations; these needs
and expectations often vary over time
Communication Privacy Management Theory
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 CPM: provides a framework for understanding the
decision-making process people use to manage
disclosure and privacy
 Rules designed to maximize benefits of disclosure
while minimizing risks
 We negotiate rules with our partner or we simply
assume that our partner understands what rules
apply
Petronio’s 5 Disclosure Principles
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1.
Private information is “owned” and people believe they
have the right to control it.
Control is accomplished through privacy rules.
3. When private information is disclosed, the recipient
becomes co-owner of the information.
4. Third-party access concerns

Permeability: how much can be told

Linkage: who else can know

Ownership: who makes third-party disclosure
5. We are likely to encounter boundary turbulence, privacy
violations, intrusions, and dilemmas.
2.
Factors in CPM Theory Rules
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 Culture
 Individualistic
cultures value privacy more than
collectivist cultures.
 Americans tend to disclose more than most
cultures.
 Gender
 Men
tend to disclose less: “strong and silent”
type.
 Women tend to disclose more: “nurturing and
sensitive” type.
Factors in CPM Theory Rules
 Motivation
 Disclose
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more to people we know or want to
know
 May disclose secrets of those we don’t like
 Risk–benefit analysis: weigh the
advantages/disadvantages of disclosing
 Context
 Influenced
by circumstances (ex: disclose to a
“professional”; may “tell” when one is in danger
 Disclosure during stress contributes to he
Effects on Relationships
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 Intimacy
 We cycle between periods of deep disclosure and attempts to
reestablish privacy boundaries; controls relationship dev.
 Disclosing secrets may damage/end relationship; opting for
privacy may preserve intimacy, avoid conflict, protect feelings.
 Reciprocity
 Partners don’t disclose at the same time/rate.
 Information Co-ownership
 Disclosing to a third party may damage trust.
 Families co-own info. and est. rules (personal, legal, financial)
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Appropriate Self-Disclosure
•Self-disclose the kind of
information you want others
to disclose to you.
•Self-disclose more intimate
information only when you
believe the disclosure
represents an acceptable
risk.
•Continue intimate self-
disclosure only if it is
reciprocated.
•Move self-disclosure to
deeper levels gradually.
•Reserve intimate or very
personal self-disclosure for
ongoing relationships.
Reciprocal
self-disclosure
has the greatest
positive effects.
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Skills for Self-Disclosure and Privacy Management
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 Owning


Crediting yourself for feelings and opinions
Making “I” statements
 Describing behavior

Recounting specific behaviors without drawing conclusions
 Disclosing feelings
 Owning and explaining emotions
Owning
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 Examples:
 “Lots of boys wet the bed.”/ “I was a bed wetter.”
 “Everybody thinks Colin is unfair.”/ “Colin hurt my feelings
with his criticism, which I perceived as unfair.”
 “Nobody likes to be laughed at.”/ “Being laughed at
embarrasses me.”
 “Jon is a flirt.”/ “Jon has been flirting with me.”
Describing Behavior
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 Identify the overall impression you are
experiencing.
 Recall the specific behaviors that led to the
impression.
 Form a message to report only what you have seen
or heard without drawing a conclusion about the
behaviors.
Describing Behavior
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 Examples:
 “I really messed up when I was in high school handing around
with gang bangers and generally acting like a tough guy.”
(evaluative and vague)
 “My freshman year in high school I began partying with a local
gang. My grades dropped, I was arrested for shoplifting, and I
got kicked off the football team. So instead of going to college
on an athletic scholarship, I’m working my way through
community college.” (specific without drawing conclusions;
focuses on the behavior)
Describing
Feelings
Explaining
emotions one
feels in a precise
and unemotional
manner
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Displaying
Feelings
Showing emotions
through facial
reactions, body
language, or
paralanguage
Disclosing Feelings
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 Increases the likelihood of having a positive interaction
with someone rather than an argument, and it decreases
the chances of provoking defensiveness
 “I feel…” doesn’t guarantee you will end up actually
describing a feeling, but may end up evaluating, labeling, or
blaming someone
 Identify what triggered the feelings
 Identify the particular emotion you are experiencing
 Use an “I feel..” followed by naming the specific feeling
 Become comfortable with describing positive feelings
before trying to describe negative feelings effectively
Protecting Privacy
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Making a conscious decision to withhold
information or feelings from others
 Change the subject.
 Mask feelings.
 Tell a “white lie.”
 Describe your feelings.
 Establish personal boundaries.
Asking for Feedback
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 Think of feedback as in your best interest.
 Be prepared for an honest response.
 Guidelines:
 Specify the kind of feedback you are seeking.
 Avoid loaded questions.
 Try to avoid negative verbal and nonverbal reactions to
feedback.
 Paraphrase what you hear.
 Show gratitude for the feedback.
Giving Personal Feedback
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Praising
Recounting
specific behaviors or
accomplishments
of another
and their positive
effects
on others
Constructive
Criticism
Diplomatically
describes the
specific negative
behaviors of
another
and their effects
Praising
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 When we keep our positive impressions of our
partners private, we deprive them of self-concept
enhancing info that encourages them to repeat the
behaviors we think are praiseworthy
 Guidelines:




Make note of the specific behavior you wish to reinforce
Describe the specific behavior
Describe the positive feelings or outcomes you or others
experienced as a result
Phrase your response so that the level of praise appropriately
reflects the significance of the behavior
Giving Constructive Criticism
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 Begin by asking your partner’s permission to




disclose negative feedback.
Preface a negative statement with a positive one.
Describe the problematic behavior by following
guidelines for describing behavior.
Be as specific as possible.
Suggest how the person can change the behavior.
Effects of Social Media on Privacy
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

Social media and cell
phone use in public blur
the distinction between
public and private
communication.
Social media and the
Internet are changing
what people view as
private and public.
Awareness of Audience
24
THE BIG BANG THEORY
“THE TANGERINE FACTOR” S1,E17
DISCUSSION:
HOW DOES PENNY REACT?
HOW WOULD YOU REACT?
HOW DOES PERSONAL INFORMATION YOU
READ ABOUT FRIENDS ON FACEBOOK
IMPACT YOUR PERCEPTION OF THEM?
Warranting Theory
25
 We use Facebook pages to create perceptions of
others:



Tags
Posts
Blog comments
 Warranting theory: We find behaviors of others
more credible when it cannot be easily manipulated
by the person whom it describes.
Digitally Managing Your Personal Information
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 Do not carry on private phone conversations in
public places.
 Do not post information online that you would
not want your employers, enemies, or identity
thieves to see.
 Be aware that others can digitally alter your
digital image.
 Use social media privacy settings.
Too much self-disclosure?
27
WHAT IS ON YOUR FACEBOOK ACCOUNT?IN
THE WRONG HANDS YOUR FACEBOOK
ACCOUNT CAN BE VERY REVEALING. SEE
TAKETHISLOLLIPOP.COM
How Facebook has changed our
conversations
28
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF WE USED OUR
FACEBOOK LINGO IN OUR FACE-TO-FACE
CONVERSATIONS:
HTTP://WWW.YOUTUBE.COM/WATCH?V=EGSTKTWXUA