ADOPTIVE
PARENTING
RESOURCES
A RESOURCE GUIDE FOR PARENTS WHO HAVE ADOPTED A
CHILD WITH A PAST HISTORY OF ABUSE OR NEGLECT
Compiled by Suzanne Heslop
WHAT TO REMEMBER…
A child healing from the trauma of past
experiences with abusive caregivers needs a
healthy family to provide the counterpoint of stable
relationships without threats, violence or
inconsistent responses to the child’s needs.
Becker-Weidman, A., Shell, D. (2005) Creating Capacity for Attachment: Dyadic Developmental
Psychotherapy in the Treatment of Trauma-Attachment Disorders. Oklahoma City: Wood
‘N’ Barnes Publishing and Distribution.
In their book Creating Capacity for Attachment: Dyadic Developmental
Psychotherapy in the Treatment of Trauma-Attachment Disorders authors
Arthur Becker-Weidman and Deborah Shell discuss the important role
caregivers have in responding appropriately to the needs of their child.
Ms. Shell states that "if a child is thirsty and needs hydration, giving her
pretzels doesn't help her feel understood, nor does it reduce her thirst."
Becker-Weidman, A., Shell, D. (2005) Creating Capacity for Attachment: Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy
in the Treatment of Trauma-Attachment Disorders. Oklahoma City: Wood ‘N’ Barnes Publishing
and Distribution.
Is there a chance you may be giving your child pretzels when she may need
water?
SO…WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?
ADOPTIVE PARENTING


Learning how to understand what your child
needs…
The following websites provide resources that
adoptive parents may find helpful throughout the
lifelong process of adoption. Below each link,
there is a brief description of the information that
is available at each specific website.
CHILD WELFARE INFORMATION GATEWAY
http://www.childwelfare.gov/adoption/
Adoptive parents can find information about what
to expect at various developmental stages in their
adopted child. Adoptive parents can also learn how
to talk about adoption, address adoption issues in
school, help children with grief and loss issues,
recognize and get help for post-adoption
depression, find needed services and obtain
financial assistance. The website also provides
suggestions on how to handle false allegations of
child abuse and neglect and discusses the impact of
adoption on adoptive parents.
ADOPT US KIDS
http://adoptuskids.org/
This website provides adoptive parents information
on respite care and adoption support groups.
Adopt Us Kids can also provide training and
support on parenting after adoption. The site also
includes a searchable database of adoption
assistance by State, state lists of mental health
service assistance programs and a list of web
services that can help an adoptive parent locate
health care assistance.
ADOPTIVE FAMILIES
http://adoptivefamilies.com/
This is an award-winning national adoption
magazine with links to several important issues in
adoption, some of which include: telling the
adoption story, siblings and adoption, family
rituals and adoption and school. There are
different articles related to adoption posted online
daily.
RAINBOW KIDS
http://rainbowkids.com/
Adoptive parents can meet families, share their
experiences, photos, and journey through adoption.
Rainbow Kids hosts an Adoption Community which
is a great place to find new friends with
experiences in all types of adoption. A strong
support system is imperative as an adoptive
parent!
ADOPTION ISSUES
http://www.adoptionissues.org/
This website explores how families with adopted
children face different challenges than those with
just biological children. Articles on the website
feature topics specifically for families with
adoptees. This website also includes a daily blog
for information relating to adoption, adopted
teenagers and adoptive parents.
ATTACH
ATTACh.org.
The Association for Treatment and Training in the
Attachment of Children (ATTACh) was created to
help families and society deal with critical
attachment and bonding issues. ATTACh promotes
a continuum of services to enhance the quality of
attachments ranging from prevention and
education, to specialized treatments. The site
describes attachment, the importance of
attachment and some signs and symptoms adoptive
parents should be monitoring in their children.
LOVE AND LOGIC
http://loveandlogic.com/
Love and Logic is a parenting curriculum that
provides simple and easy to use techniques to help
parents have more fun and less stress while raising
responsible kids of all ages. Love and Logic assists
parents in resisting the urge to get into power
struggles with their children. Oftentimes, adopted
children demand control of their environment and
this curriculum can assist adoptive parents in
providing their child with some control while
remaining in charge at home.
ADOPTING
http://www.adopting.org/
This website provides information and resources
regarding adoption language, child health and
development, parenting concerns, parenting in
difficult situations, post adoption resources,
practical help, support groups and how to better
understand an adopted child.
ADOPTION NETWORK CLEVELAND
http://adoptionnetwork.org/
Adoption Network Cleveland serves all members of
the adoption constellation and can assist adoptive
families in strengthening their ties to one another.
Adoption Network Cleveland can provide adoptive
families with adoption navigators (to guide families
through the adoption process and provide support
once an adoption is finalized). Families can also be
provided with an educational liaison, ongoing
support and education.
ADOPTION
http://www.adoption.com/
This website contains all things adoption: adoption
articles, adoption blogs, adoption forums,
information regarding adoption professionals and
the most recent news in adoption. The website
contains a vast amount of information regarding
specific parenting topics as well as a new parent
guidebook for adoptive parents.
MOST IMPORTANTLY…
WHEN IN DOUBT, STAY CALM AND LOVING…
NO ONE IS A PERFECT PARENT.
AND THAT IS OKAY.
WEB DESIGNER:
SUZANNE HESLOP IS A GRADUATE STUDENT AT CASE
WESTERN RESERVE UNIVERSITY/MANDEL SCHOOL OF
APPLIED SOCIAL SCIENCES IN CLEVELAND, OHIO. SHE
HAS BEEN WORKING WITH CHILDREN ADOPTED
INTERNATIONALLY AND DOMESTICALLY SINCE 2003.