Most dysfunctional
families are a direct
outgrowth of
TROUBLED PARENTS.
Troubled parents may:
Have addictions
Use physical violence
May be unable to provide
Exploit children (use them as
possessions, use strong
authoritarian control)
Regardless of the parents’ intentions,
children may suffer:
 Depression
 Live troubled lives
 By withdrawing from society
 Have low self-esteem
Abusive Parents
1. Physical- satisfying their
emotions by taking their anger
out on their children, by not
correcting their children, by
using little effort to control
their children.
2. Sexual –Contact between
an adult and child that must
be kept secret.
3. Verbal – Frequent belittling
or criticism, using profanity
toward their children,
verbally abusing them
instead of their actions.
Roles in a Dysfunctional Family
 Addict-a family member that is under the
influence of alcohol, drugs, porn, work, etc. to the
point of disrupting the family.
 Enabler-a family member that allows the addict to
continue their addiction; excuses, ignoring the
problem, denial, etc.
Family Hero Child:
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“9 going on 40”
Takes over parent role, early
Responsible
Self-sufficient
Looks good on the outside
Good student, good in sports, prom queen, etc
Make parents look good
Family Hero Adult:
 Controlling, judgmental,
compulsive, driven
 “Success” on the outside
 Cut off from their inner emotional
life
 Hard time admitting that there is
anything that needs to be healed.
Scapegoat (Child)
 Family feels ashamed of
 Acts out the tension the family ignores
 Provides distractions from real issues
 Has trouble in school
 Becomes pregnant or addicted as
teenagers
Scapegoat (Adult)
Become cynical and distrustful
Have a lot of self-hatred
Can be very self-destructive
Usually first to get help
Lost Child (Child)
 Attempts to be invisible
 Daydream, fantasize, read a lot,
watch TV
 Deal with reality by withdrawing
from it
 Deny they have feelings
 Don’t bother getting upset
Lost Child (Adult)
Unable to feel
Low self-esteem
Terrified of intimacy
Relationship phobia
Withdrawn, shy, socially
isolated
Mascot/Family Clown (Child)
 Takes responsibility for emotional
well-being of family
 “Social” director/clown
 Diverts family’s attention from the
pain and anger
Mascot/Family Clown (Adult)
 Valued for kind heart, generosity, ability to
listen to others
 Whole self is centered on others
 Don’t get their own needs met
 Cannot receive love only give it
 Work in “helping” professions to overcome
 Have low self worth and guilt and to overcome,
work hard to be nice