Professional Boundaries
in Ministry
Fall Theological Conference
Rick Loseth, LICSW
PACT 4 Families Collaborative
320 -231-7030 ext. 2976
rick_l@pactforfamilies.org
Welcome
Purpose of Morning
• spend a couple of hours in discussion on the broad
topic of “professional boundaries”
• how “electronic communication” has impacted
boundaries and your ministry
Introductions
• Who’s here
• Length of time in paid ministry
• Less than 5 yrs
• 5 to 10 yrs
• 10 to 15 yrs
• 15 plus yrs
• Ordained Pastor
• Youth Minister
• Serve as the only pastor at your church
• Serve with another pastor or other staff
Boundaries
• What are Boundaries?
o They help define space, what is yours or mine, how we
do or not do, etc.
o Boundaries are the defining space which clarifies “you”
and “me”
o Help to make sure we are using time, space, things,
feelings and relationships in the most appropriate way
o Help ensure the best use of things, use that is consistent
with our intentions, and with their original purpose
o Boundaries provide for safe connections between
individuals
Boundaries
• Boundaries involves Self Discipline
o Are the limits we place on ourselves (discipline)
o The limits we place around ourselves (prevent invasion of
space, etc)
• Boundaries help clarify and communicate our
intentions
o Agreements with what is appropriate, what is not
(cultural influences)
o Boundaries are not arbitrary
o Boundaries can also be confusing
(cultural, family of origin)
Boundaries
• Boundaries ultimately convey Respect
• Are reasons for boundaries
• Setting limits, making agreements in
relationships, is an essential way of loving our
neighbors as ourselves
• Is also the recognition that my actions have
potential to be positive or negative
• Is the recognition that my actions have potential
to be positive or negative
Boundaries -summary
• Boundaries involve your belief system, values,
morals, emotions, and your life experiences
• Healthy boundaries serve to define who you are,
contain you and protect you
• Boundaries are the guidelines that assist you
with appropriate closeness and separateness in
relations with self and others
Boundaries and Relationships
• Managing our professional relationships are
essential to being effective in our jobs
• Professional Boundaries are intended to create
safe, positive connections with those we are
involved with
• Is critically important – our ‘clients’ are all
struggling at some level with ‘boundaries’…
Professional vs. Personal
Relationships
Professional
Personal
Professional vs. Personal
Relationships
Professional
Paid
Training
Education
Job Description
Time Limited
Power Imbalance
Supervision
Can “choose clients”
Confidentiality
Goals/purpose
Records
Licensure
Defined place/time to meet
Professional vs. Personal Relationships
Professional
Power is unequal
Self disclosure - one way
Generally time-limited
Meeting location defined
Time limited/ session times
Paid for time
Training/education required
Professional standards
Licensure
Records kept
Specific Goals
Personal
Aims at equal power
Two way self-disclosure
Can last forever
Can meet anywhere
No time limits
Unpaid
No training required
No defined standards
No licensure needed
No records kept
No goals
Professional – Personal - Ministerial
Relationships
Professional
Personal
Ministerial
What is unique about a “Ministerial” relationship as
compared to the other two?
What blurs the lines between
personal
professional
ministerial relationships?
What changes in a “ministry” relationship?
Does it change?
Professional – Personal - Ministerial
Relationships
How does “power” influence
relationships for those in ministry?
How does our “power” influence
communication with members in the
congregation?
When doing the talking?
When doing the listening?
Communication • All communication has rules –
some explicit, others implicit
• What are some of these “rules”?
• For speaking
• For writing
A Continuum of Boundary Keeping
Clear /
Boundary
Blurring of / Boundary
Boundaries Violation
ALWAYS O.K. / SOMETIMES O.K.
/ NEVER O.K___
How has electronic
communication impacted
the way we
communicate?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0eUeL3n7fDs
The Social Media Revolution 2012
What has changed?................
• Expectations
• Time
• Access
• Feedback/non-verbal
• How else??
How have the changes in electronic
communication affected…..
• Your ministry
• how you relate to others in the congregation
• how you relate to other church staff
• Your congregation
• How the congregation communicates
“formally”
• How the congregation communicates
“informally”
• Share one or two examples of each
Impact……
• What impact have these changes had on your
ministry?
• In how you relate to your parishioners?
• In how you relate to other staff?
• Are they positive? Negative??? Or ?????
Impact……
Talk about one “thing” you are doing to
positively manage your:
• Professional Boundaries
• Your Electronic Boundaries
• For yourself
• For your congregation
Guidelines – some ideas
• Expectations –what is Professional vs. Personal
communication?
• Time –when am I communicating electronically?
• Access- what needs to be dealt with now vs.
waiting?
• Feedback/Non- verbal- what needs to be done
in person?
• What else??
Guidelines –Next steps…..
• Do I have a set of “guidelines” I use when
communicating by email/texting/other
electronic forms?
• Does our church/staff have guidelines for
youth and lay leaders to use?
• What will I do when I go back to my
congregation/ministry setting with the
discussion from today?
Thanks!
Rick Loseth, LICSW
PACT for Families Collaborative
320-231-7030 ext. 2976
rick_l@pactforfamilies.org