How Do You Write
a History Thesis
Statement???
What’s a thesis
statement????
Why bother with these??
 In EVERY SINGLE ESSAY for APWH the
thesis is the very first point graded
 If you miss the thesis point you will miss the
points for supporting evidence and the most
you could end up with is a grade of a 3-4 out
of 9
 If you can’t write a thesis statement correctly,
the writing in the course is going to be very
difficult for you
Ok, so what exactly is a
thesis statement?
 A thesis statement is one or more
COMPLETE sentences that convey the main
idea of the essay
 A successful thesis statement shares the
main idea of the paper. Ideally someone
could just read your thesis and know what
you would be addressing in your paper
What else should I know
about a successful thesis?
 A strong thesis should NOT be too:
 Broad
 Vague
 Narrow
• A thesis is a roadmap: it gives the reader
the direction you are heading, but doesn’t
give every detail of the path (that is what
the body is for)
So what is NOT a thesis?
 Anything in question format
 EXAMPLE: What were the comparisons
between the Romans and Ottomans?
 A thesis is NOT just restating the topic of
the essay.
 EXAMPLE: I will compare the Ottoman and
Roman Empires.
These are BAD examples of
thesis statements in APWH
 COMP: There were many similarities and
differences between the Shang and Zhou
dynasties
 Why is this bad??? It doesn’t tell me that
you know any history. A 4th grader can
write this thesis. Give me an example of
a sim and diff that you can build on in the
body
These are BAD examples of
thesis statements in APWH
 DBQ: The Roman Republic can be seen
politically, economically, and socially.
 Why is this bad??? Again, it doesn’t give
me the direction you are headed in. Give
an example of how the Romans are
political, economical, and social.
These are BAD examples of
thesis statements in APWH
 CCOT: There are many continuities and
changes in Indian Ocean Trade from
600-1450.
 Why is this bad??? Well it does include
the time period (which is good) but as
before it doesn’t give any examples of
what changed and what stayed the
same. It is also lacking a turning point
(which we will discuss)
SO, LET’S SEE IF YOU
CAN GIVE THIS A TRY…
See if you can find the
thesis in this paragraph!
Psychologists have argued for decades
about how a person’s character is formed.
Numerous psychologists believe that one’s
birth order (i.e. place in the family as the
youngest, oldest, or middle child) has the
greatest influence. Birth order can have a
significant impact in the formation of a
child’s character. Birth order can strongly
affect one’s relationship with parents,
relationships with others, and how one
views responsibility as an adult.
Remember…
a thesis can be 1-2
sentences
Psychologists have argued for decades
about how a person’s character is formed.
Numerous psychologists believe that one’s
birth order (i.e. place in the family as the
youngest, oldest, or middle child) has the
greatest influence. Birth order can have a
significant impact in the formation of a
child’s character. Birth order can strongly
affect one’s relationship with parents,
relationships with others, and how one
views responsibility as an adult.
Let’s try a history
example…
 Throughout history empires have sought
expansion as a way to increase the strength of
the civilization and gain power for the rulers.
Two empires of the ancient world, the Roman
in the east and the Byzantine in the west, were
no exception. Both the Romans and the
Byzantines wanted to have a large empire to
have access to profitable trade in the
Mediterranean, yet the Romans had the
geographic advantage of being able to expand
to the east and west while the Byzantines were
geographically forced to expand to the north.
Here’s the answer…
 Throughout history empires have sought
expansion as a way to increase the strength of
the civilization and gain power for the rulers.
Two empires of the ancient world, the Roman
in the east and the Byzantine in the west, were
no exception. Both the Romans and the
Byzantines wanted to have a large empire to
have access to profitable trade in the
Mediterranean, yet the Romans had the
geographic advantage of being able to expand
to the east and west while the Byzantines were
geographically forced to expand to the north.
So how should I set up my
essay with the thesis?
 The Introduction:
Broad opening
sentence
2-3 more
specific
sentences
leading up to
thesis
THESIS STATEMENT
So how should I set up my
essay with the thesis?
 The Body Paragraphs:
The number of body
paragraphs can vary
depending on the topic
and style of essay you
are writing (COMP,
CCOT, DBQ).
However, the body
paragraphs should
ALWAYS support your
thesis with historical
evidence.
So how should I set up my
essay with the thesis?
 The Conclusion:
 Note: NEVER include new info in the
conclusion, you should have already done
that
Get more
broad as
you
conclude
(about 2
sentences)
Last sentence
should wrap up
essay
Restate Thesis in
different wording
Ok, putting it all together you
should style your essay…
INTRODUCTION
THESIS
BODY
PARAGRAPHS
CONCLUSION
Now that your brain is full of
this invaluable knowledge it
is time to put it to use. Pull
out your pen because it’s
time to practice!!
I understand thesis
statements, do
you?