Identifying Bullying:
Kids Being Kids or Something More?
Harrisonburg City Schools
January 26, 2012
Statistics
 The 2003 National Center for Education Statistics report on
school violence reported increases in the percentage of
students victimized by bullying in 2001 as compared to
1999. While crime at school as a whole has declined in
recent years, bullying is one of the few problems to
increase in prevalence
 A national study found that 29.9% percent of students are
involved in bullying either as a bully (13.0%), a victim
(10.6%) or both a bully and a victim (6.3%) (Nansel,
Overpeck, Pilla, Ruan, Simons-Morton, & Scheidt, 2001).
 The National Institute of Child Health and Human
Development estimated that 1.7 million U.S. children in
grades 6 through 10 can be identified as bullies (Nansel et
al., 2001).
What is Bullying?
What is Bullying?
Bullying is when purposeful acts of meanness
are repeated over time in a situation where
there is an imbalance of power.
– Bullying is all about power – the essence of bullying
is not in the actions of the bully, but in their
intentions.
What is Bullying
Types of Bullying
Physical: Hitting, shoving, pushing, kicking, etc.
Emotional: Gossiping, embarrassing, threatening,
leaving someone out, spreading rumors,
cyberbullying, etc.
Property: Stealing, destruction, vandalism
Bullying Myths
 “It’s a boy thing”
 “They’ll grow out of it”
 “Bullying is no big deal”
Normal Conflict

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Equal power
Happens Occasionally
Accidental
Not serious
Equal emotional reaction
Not seeking power or
attention
 Not trying to get something
 Remorse – Take
responsibility
 Effort to solve the problem
vs.









Bullying
Imbalance of power
Repeated negative acts
Purposeful
Serious – threat of
physical or emotional harm
Reaction from victim only
Seeking power & control
Gain material things or
power
No remorse – Blames
victim
No effort to solve problem
Normal Conflict vs. Bullying
 Normal Conflict or Bullying -- You Decide
http://youtu.be/iXXKMehgiAk?t=1m12s
Normal Conflict vs. Bullying
How do you decide?
 Look at the issue of power.
 Look at willingness to resolve the
conflict.
 Ask the right questions to put the event
into context.
Why do Children Bully?
 Common Contributing Factors
– No or inconsistent consequences
– Observing bullying behavior
– Victims of bullying
– Developing negative self concept
– Negative attention and feedback
– Trying to “fit in”
Is My Child a Bully?
Watch for warning signs
 Some questions to ask yourself:
– Has my child ever been accused of bullying at school or
elsewhere?
– Has my child gotten into trouble for fighting with other
children?
– Does my child become easily frustrated when they do
not get their way?
– Who are my child’s friends? How do they interact with
others?
– What does my child do with their spare time?
– Does my child use negative terms to describe others?
Do they show little concern for others in bad situations?
What Can I Do?
 If you suspect your child is bullying others:
– Take it seriously!
– Talk to your child and find out why he/she is
bullying
– Apply clear, fair, and significant negative
consequences
– Spend more time with your child and supervise
their activities
What Can I Do?
 Require your child apologize to the victim
 Explain why bullying behavior is unacceptable and
how it affects others.
 Teach your child that power can be experienced
through doing good
 Share your concerns with your child’s teacher and
work with them to change your child’s behavior
Prevent Bullying
Start at home!
 Teach self-control through discipline
 Teach the “Golden Rule”
 Teach your child to control his/her anger
 Communicate zero tolerance for the
mistreatment of others
 Teach your child that mistreatment and
kindness are powerful
Prevent Bullying
Bullying
 Hold family meetings to teach empathy,
sensitivity, and values
 Teach kids to solve problems without using
violence and praise them when they do
 Discuss models of acceptance
 Discuss bullying scenes you watch on
television or in movies
 Teach your child to say “I’m sorry”, “Please
forgive me” and then be kind to the person
Sources
 Virginia Youth Violence Project http://youthviolence.edschool.virginia.edu
 www.bullyfree.com
 National Association of School Psychologists (NASP) –
www.nasponline.org
???Questions???