Dating
A Biblical Perspective
Presented by: (add presenter name here)
Written by: Marcos Bomfim, MA
Director of the Department of Family Ministries for the South
American Division of Seventh-day Adventists in Brasilia, Brazil.
From Revival and Reformation: Families Reaching Across.
Overview of Dating
• Purpose of dating
• For God’s glory
• Part of the process of becoming
independent
• For marriage
• Following God’s will
• Be different than the world
The Biblical History of Choice
• In Eden: There was no choice
• Choice: Seems presented unfavorably
• Antidiluvians
• Esau
• Samson
• Christian criteria for choosing
Biblical Example: Isaac and Rebekah
•
•
•
•
•
•
Not Canaanites
An angel goes before you
Main criteria: Character qualities
Involved the family
Isaac prayed as he waited
Modesty as attraction
Transparency
• It should not be secret
• 2 Corinthians 4:2
• That which is secret will be revealed
• Luke 8:17
• Dating is subject to judgment
• 1 Corinthians 4:5
• 2 Corinthians 5:10
• Ecclesiastes 12:14
Boundaries of Love
• Unequally Yoked
• Amos 3:3
• 1 Kings 11:1-6
• Divorce, dating and remarriage
• Sexuality
Sexuality: 5 Characteristics of a Marriage
1. It has a beginning: the man leaves the parental
family and becomes independent.
2. God’s will is to be a heterosexual monogamy.
3. It is a complete companionship: one in mind,
heart, will and action culminating in “one flesh.”
4. In its character it is indissoluble. It is a union
marked by trust and loyalty.
5. It is the legitimate place for sexual intimacy.
Adapted from Ekkehart Mueller, The Gift of Sexuality, The BRI Newsletter, Number 39, July 2012,
pg. 13
Sexuality: Sexual Sins
• Fornication – includes premarital sex, adultery,
incest, homosexuality, sodomy, etc.
• Adultery – sexual relations with someone other
than the spouse
• Homosexual activity – the effeminate seems to
take on the role of the woman in a homoerotic
relationship; asernokoites describes who adopts
the male role (1 Corinthians 6:9)
Sexuality: Sexual Sins
• Incest – sexual relationship with a close relative
• Divorce – Jesus spoke against divorce as did Paul
• Intentionally mismatched marriages –
Widow/widower may remarry, but “only in the
Lord;” also can be understood as a warning
against marriage of a non-believer.
• Pornography – description or representation of
any type of sexual impurity, generally with the
intention of provoking sexual desire
Sexuality: Sexual Sins
• Masturbation – act of self sexual stimulation for
pleasure; generally associated with pornography
or other sexual sins.
• Consequences – stimulates impure thoughts against
God’s commandments; outside God’s original plan for
two real people.
• Healthy sexual activity: an expression of love
Sexuality: Sexual Sins
• We are called to be children of light
• Consequences can be permanent
• What to do? 2 Timothy 2:22
• Flee also youthful lusts;
• but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace
with those who call on the Lord out of a
pure heart.