Talking with your children and family about living
with HIV/AIDS
Questions Regarding Disclosure
from the parents perspective
 Should I tell my child(ren)?
 When should I talk with them?
 How will my child(ren) take the news?
 Will my diagnosis stigmatize my child(ren)?
 How will my relationship with my child(ren) change?
 Can my kids keep a secret?
 Will my HIV status be a burden to my children?
 How should I prepare to tell them? (Perm planning,
education, resources)
Talking to your children about HIV
Status
 Emotions
 Overwhelmed
 Fear
 Anxiety
 Guilt
 Support
 Doctor
 Social Worker
 Family
 Friends
 Church
Disclosure
 Decisions to disclose HIV status depend on several
factors:
 How long a person has been positive
 Access to social and emotional resources
 The nature of the relationship between the person with
HIV/AIDS and the person being disclosed to
Telling children they are HIV+
 Why do you want you

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
children to know
HIV-related questions
and answers
Resources and
Information
Age –appropriate
Information little by
little as they are ready
 Cognitive age vs.
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

Physical Age
Open communication
and non judgment
Prepare to talk about
sexual health
Feelings of isolation,
anger, depression
Ask for help
Disclosure is a
private/family manner
Telling Children you are HIV+
 How will your children




react?
Children will ask about
your health
What will happen to
them if you get sick?
How did you get it? Will
they get it?
Might have no questions
at all
 Your children might




already know something
May be angry about the
secrets
Open communication is
key
Use this as an
opportunity to educate
Encourage them to talk
to you and others if
needed
Taking care of yourself
 It is important to keep doctors
appointments and take medications
 You are a better parent if you are healthy
 Important to deal with feelings and
questions
 Support groups and peer groups can be
helpful
 Talk to your social worker/counselor
Preparation for Disclosure
 Role Play with your Social Worker
 Rehearse different sceneries
 Have support systems and resources available
 Permanency Planning and Legal in Place
 Standby Guardianships
 Living Wills
 Power of Attorney
 Support Groups and Peer Support
 Individual, Family, and Children
Permanency Planning and Case
Management
 Part of Check list (housing, mental health, etc)
 Empowerment
 Permanency Planning for all parents and caregivers
 Positive decision
 Normalize the decision
Social Worker’s Role
Level 1: No involvement
Level 2: Working with Family Before and After
Disclosure but not present at event
Level 3: Present at disclosure for support but not involved with event
Level 4: Participates in disclosure event but does not lead
Level 5: Leads the disclosure discussion
Level 6: Social Worker/Doctor discloses status of child or parent
Case Study: Rochelle
Case Study: Samantha
Tips
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Deal with your own feelings first
Have answers to anticipated questions
Build a strong parent-child relationship
Seek support for yourself and children
Gather HIV-related information and resources
Create an appropriate environment for disclosure:
 No interruptions
 Relaxed as Possible’
 Social Worker involvement (Level)
 Remember to follow up and that it is a process
 Give love, reassurance and hugs!!
Resources
 Bauman, L. J. et al, (2007). Children of Mothers With HIV/AIDS: Unmet Needs for
Mental Health Services. Pediatrics, 120 (5), pp. 1141- 1146.
 Cichocki, M. (2009, Jan. 10). How to Tell Your Children You Have HIV or AIDS. (chap.
Health’s Disease and Condition) Retrieved Nove. 23, 2011, from
http://aids.about.com/od/hivseniors/a/aginghly.htm
 Cogwill, B. O. et al, (2008). Fears About HIV Transmission in Families With an HIVInfected Parent: A Qualitative Analysis. Pediatrics, 122 (5), pp. 950-956.
 Kalichman, S.C. (2007, Nov). HIV/AIDS Case Managers and Client HIV Status
Disclosure: Perceived Client Needs, Practices, and Services. Health & Social Work. 33(4),
259-262. Retrieved Nov 2011, from NASW.
 Kennedy, D. P, B. Cogwill, et al (2010). Parents’ Disclosure of Their HIV Infection to Their
Children in the Context of the Family. Springer, 14 pp. 1095-1104.
 Mahanes, J. (2011, Jun. 16). D.C. HIV/AIDS Rate Still At Epidemic Levels. Washington City
Paper. Retrieved May 22, 2012, from
www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/citydesk/2011/16/d-chivaids.
 World Health Organization (2011). Guideline on HIV Disclosure Counseling For Children
Up to 12 Years of Age. [Manual/Programme]. Geneva, Switzerland: WHO Press