How to Lead a Small
Group Discussion
With a “Spirituality of Leadership”
~Guidelines for Table Captains~
A Spiritual Prelude…
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A Captain should be both a Spiritual Mentor and a
Fellow Catholic Pilgrim on his own journey
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As a Mentor, he needs to be devoted to Jesus Christ and
His Church, consciously striving to live the Devout Life
as “Priest, Prophet, and King” in his own life and
among the men at his table
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As a Fellow Catholic Pilgrim, he is to share in the
journey of the men at his table: a spiritual journey of
faith and doubt; virtue and sin; joy and sorrow; a journey
whose end is Heaven
The Devout Life
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St. Francis DeSales calls devotion, “simply true love of
God.”
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All Catholics who practice the minimum of their faith
will encounter God’s Grace and cooperate with Charity
working through them.
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The Devout Man, however, will seek God more
frequently, consciously, and with greater passion,
always in a way that enhances his own vocation and
state in life.
The Devout Life
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The Devout Man seeks and finds God through a
personal relationship with Jesus Christ, Who is found
in the Catholic Church…
 …most excellently in Communion with the
community of believers at Mass.
 …by devout reception of the sacraments.
 …by liturgical and personal prayer that extends and
deepens his relationship with Christ. Consider a Holy
Hour. Sign up: http://stmmm.org/adoration.html
…by forming his intellect and conscience through
spiritual reading.
 …by acts of Charity to love his neighbor as himself.
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A Spiritual Leader:
Priest, Prophet, and King
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The Catholic Leader participates in Christ’s Priesthood:
“all their works, prayers, and apostolic undertakings, family
and married life, daily work, relaxation of mind and
body…even the hardships of life if patiently
born…become spiritual sacrifices acceptable to
God…[consecrating] the world itself to God…” (CCC #901).
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The Table Captain may see his role as joined to a priest's
role: bringing others closer to God by “consecrating the
world to God,” offering his time and prayers as a sacrifice
for the good of his soul and the souls of the men at his
table.
A Spiritual Leader:
Priest, Prophet, and King
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The Catholic Leader participates in Christ’s office as Prophet. In
the words of St. Thomas Aquinas, “To teach in order to lead
others to faith is the task of every preacher and believer” (CCC
#904). This is to be done both by word and the testimony of
life” (#905).
The Table Captain should avail himself of the great wealth of
classic and contemporary Christian Literature so he can better
Know, Explain, Defend, and Love his Catholic Faith. Good
spiritual reading is also like a guidebook on the journey to God
that can help a man seek and find.
Any Priest, Deacon, or fellow Devout Pilgrim would be happy to
recommend spiritual reading that has helped to form his own
intellect, conscience, and prayer life. JUST ASK! MM web link:
“Faith and Formation” “http://stmmm.org/RT-FaithFormation.html
A Spiritual Leader:
Priest, Prophet, and King
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The Catholic Leader is called to participate in Christ’s
Kingly office…
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…by making “his own body an obedient subject
and, by governing himself…[refusing] to let his
passions breed rebellion in his soul…” (CCC #908).
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…by cooperating with his “pastors in the service of
the ecclesial community, for the sake of its growth
and life” (#910). MM web link: “Outreach”
http://stmmm.org/RT-MissionOutreach.html
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The Table Captain should see his role as a true form of
Christian Leadership, remembering always Christ the
Leader: Servant and Good Shepherd.
A Fellow Catholic Pilgrim
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The Table Captain should nevertheless always remember
that he is a Brother in Christ on his own journey to God; a
journey with other Brothers in the Lord. Let him
remember the words of the Pastoral Constitution of the
Church (Vatican II):
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“The joys and the hopes, the [grief] and the anxieties of the
men of this age, especially those who are poor or in any way
afflicted, these are the joys and hopes, the [grief] and
anxieties of the followers of Christ” (G et S, #1).
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The Table Captain should share in the faith, doubts, moral
victories, sinful failings, joys, and sorrows of his group as he
offers and facilitates encouragement and brotherly support
among the husbands, fathers, and sons at his table. MM web
link: “Inspirational Docs/Videos” http://stmmm.org/InspirationalDocs.html
Small Group Discussions
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Set the Tone
Navigate
Environment
Facilitate
Dealing with Silence
Encourage
Small Group Discussions
Set the Tone
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Create an open prayerful environment
Listen actively
 Encourage participation
 Make members feel at ease
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Members look to you for guidance and
leadership
Small Group Discussions
Navigate
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Keep the conversation on track
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Focus on topic and questions for discussion
It is ok to digress to the extent group is willing to “go there”
BUT
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be mindful of the relevance of discussion to the overall theme of the day
relate the “off-topic” discussion back to the general theme of the session
Foster an atmosphere of acceptance of each member’s
point of view
Let the group explore various related themes to the topic
at hand but do not hesitate to steer the discussion back to
the main point of the discussion
Small Group Discussions
Environment
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Everyone who wants to speak should have the opportunity
to do so
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Create an environment where members feel comfortable
speaking freely
Encourage others to listen – the speaker should have the ability
to finish his thought before someone else jumps in
The ideal table complement is five members
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Be aware of the tables around you
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Be sensitive to body language
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If there are too few or too many people at your table make an effort to
encourage consolidation
Someone may not be speaking but their actions may indicate that
they are uncomfortable with a particular discussion thread
Attempt to steer the conversation away from a topic which
may make someone uncomfortable
Small Group Discussions
Facilitate
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Keep the conversation moving when it appears to be
slowing
 Attempt to connect the points members have made
on a particular subject
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Do not let any one person, yourself included, monopolize
the discussion
 Try to keep everyone engaged and sharing
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Draw those who have a tendency not to speak into the
discussion by actively seeking their views on the
question; but do not press if they are not ready to speak.
Small Group Discussions
Dealing with Silence
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Do not fear silence
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Members may be digesting a question and trying to frame a
response
Silence may be awkward but it is OK
If silence persists, move to another question and
suggest that the group can come back to the topic later
if there is time remaining
Small Group Discussions
Encourage
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Encourage sharing by affirming the input being given
by members
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Share with the larger group important points that may
have been discussed
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These comments could be of a general nature, or
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if they are personal make sure that your group is comfortable
sharing.
Small Group Discussions
Final Thoughts
Additional helpful suggestions
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When meeting with a new group for the first time, go
around the table and ask each member to introduce and
tell a little about themselves
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Familiarize yourself with the weekly reading ahead of
time
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Read aloud or ask a volunteer to read aloud each
question then seek a consensus as to which question
should be tackled first
Small Group Discussions
Final Thoughts (con’t)
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Do not focus on one person and do not let one person
drive the discussion
Keep the members of your table at ease by creating a
warm relaxed environment
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Share your own personal experiences when appropriate
as a way to encourage others to share, but avoid
pressuring anyone to speak
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Laughter can be a great way to put the group at ease
and make members more inclined to share. However
reestablish a more serious tone when the time is right to
move on