Chapter TWO:
Accepting Personal
Responsibility
Quiz 1, Language of Responsibility, ABC
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Homework
Note: No late assignments will be accepted.
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Quiz Time
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Accepting Personal Responsibility
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Adopting the Creator Role
“The essence of personal responsibility is responding wisely to
life’s opportunities and challenges, rather than waiting passively
for luck or other people to make the choices for us.”
• When people keep doing what they’ve been doing
even when it doesn’t work, they are acting as
VICTIMS
• When people change their beliefs and behaviors to
create the best results they can, they are acting as
CREATORS
• The key ingredient of personal responsibility is
CHOICE
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Responsibility Model
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Self-Talk (internal voice)
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Self-Talk (internal voice) - continue
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Self-Talk (internal voice) - continue
• The Inner Critic
– Blames us for whatever goes wrong in our life
– “Everything is my fault.”
• The Inner Defender
– Deflects all criticism and places it on others
– “Everything is their fault.”
• The Inner Guide
– Seeks to make the best of any situation (wisdom)
– “Am I on course or off course?” If I’m off course,
what can I do to get back on course?”
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Changing Victim Language
• If I weren’t so stupid, I
wouldn’t have to take
this dumb class again.
• I would make the team
if the coach was fair.
• I know I didn’t spend
nearly enough time
studying last
semester. I’m going
to study this subject
from 3:30-4:30 every
day. I’ll also go to
tutoring center for 2
hours on Tuesdays
and Thursdays.
• I’m going to increase
my strength, speed
and skills so I can earn
a position on the team.
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Applying the Concept: Victim Vs. Creator
• “I got cheated on this
grade!”
• “I’m going to meet with my
professor to find out exactly
what I need to change.”
• “I know I’ll do lousy this
term because my schedule
is so messed up.”
• “People on my study team
are lazy and worthless. I’m
quitting.”
• I didn’t understand the
tutor I saw today. I’ll go
back tomorrow and see if I
can find a different tutor
who explains things in a way
that makes more sense to
me.”
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Language of Responsibility
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•
•
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Language of Responsibility Worksheet
Work in groups
10 minutes
Share out
Language of Responsibility Worksheet
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The Wise Choice Process
1.
2.
3.
4.
What’s my present situation?
How would I like my situation to be?
What are my possible choices?
What’s the likely outcome of each possible
choice?
5. Which choice(s) will I commit to doing?
6. When and how will I evaluate my plan?
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The Wise Choice Process (SAMPLE)
1. What’s my present
situation?
–
I stayed up all night
studying for my first
history test. When I
finished taking the test, I
hoped for an A. At worst,
I expected a B. When I
got the test back, my
grade was a D. Five other
students got A’s. I feel
depressed and angry.
2. How would I like my
situation to be?
–
I would like to get A’s on
all of my future test.
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The Wise Choice Process (SAMPLE)
3.
What are my possible choices?
a)
b)
c)
d)
e)
f)
g)
h)
i)
Complain to classmates &
anyone who would listen
Drop class & take it next term
with another instructor
Complain to the department
head about grade
Ask classmate for help
Ask instructor for suggestions
about improving grade
Read about study skills &
implement new study
techniques
Request an opportunity to retest
Do all practice quizzes online
Get a tutor
4.
What’s the likely outcome of
each possible choice?
a)
b)
c)
d)
e)
f)
g)
h)
i)
Immediate pleasure blasting the
instructor & get sympathy
Lose 3 units & time because I
might have to make it up
Department head might redirect
to talk to instructor
Might learn new study skills and
make new friends
Learn what to do next time &
shows that you care
Learn new strategies & might
help improve future score
Might get a re-test & show that
you care
Help improve future score
Help improve, but will take time
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The Wise Choice Process (SAMPLE)
5. Which choice(s) will I
commit to doing?
–
I’ll talk to my successful
classmates, make an
appointment with my
instructor and have him
explain what I could do to
improve, and I’ll request an
opportunity to retake the
test. I’ll read the study skills
sections of On Course and
implement at least 3 new
study strategies. If these
choices don’t raise my next
test score, then I’ll get a
tutor
6. When & how will I
evaluate my plan?
–
After my next history test,
I’ll see if I have achieved my
goal of getting an A. If not,
I’ll revise my plan.
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Change Your Inner Conversation
• Albert Ellis – “The answer lies in what each
personal believes caused the event… our different
responses could be understood by realizing that
the activating event (A) plus our beliefs (B) equal
the consequences (C) (how we respond).”
A+B=C
• KEY: Stop the irrational belief (or what he called
stinkin’ thinkin’) and start positive beliefs and
behaviors
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Activating Event
Beliefs
Consequence
Student #1: Instructor didn’t
show up for a scheduled
conference/student meeting
My instructor thinks I’m
dumb. I’ll never get a
college degree. I’m a
failure in life.
Got depressed and
watched television all
evening.
Student #2: SAME
My instructor won’t help
me. Teachers don’t care
about students.
Got angry and spent
the night telling
friends how horrible
the instructor is.
I’m not sure what went
wrong. Sometimes things
just don’t turn out the way
you plan. There’s always
tomorrow.
Studied for another
class. Planned to call
the instructor the next
day to see what
happened and set up
a new appointment.
???
???
Student #3: SAME
???
???
???
???
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Homework
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Journal 5 – page 40
Journal 6 – page 47
Journal 7 – page 53
Read Wise Choices in College
– Reading – page 57
Journals for 5th edition only:
• 4, 5, 6
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Study Guide
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•
•
•
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Responsibility Model: Victim Vs. Creator
Inner Critic, Inner Defender, Inner Guide
Personal Responsibility
The Wise Choice Process
A+B=C
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