Homeless Cage Fights! Countless families are worried about their safety within Seattle and Kings County. Seattle was declared a State of Emergency for homelessness in 2015 and has not seen a significant improvement since then. The homeless population has been especially rampant within the past 5 years, due to COVID, a declining economy, and rising house prices. In King’s County alone, the homeless rate increased by 10% between the years 2020 and 2022, going from 40,800 to 53,500! (Kings County 2), and the homeless population in Seattle rose by 3,000 to 28,000 homeless just in 2022! (Patrick) That is an 11% increase, the greatest increase in homelessness Seattle has ever seen! The increase in homeless has left middle-class families fearing their safety due to the inherent rise in gun violence and drug abusers within their friendly communities. Programs like pumping a homeless fund with hundreds of millions of dollars have barely made a dent in the rampant homeless rates, and new shelters are only able to house a few hundred out of the tens of thousands of homeless. (Inslee) A revolutionary idea! An industry if you will. Ran by the homeless of Seattle and Kings County. Starting as a small neighborhood entertainment service. Homeless cage fights: the solution to our problem! The premise is quite simple and practical. Two homeless people volunteers, or are selected by the homeless population, which creates exclusivity which humans are drawn to, to fight to the death in a cage match. The rules are simple: - No weapons. - Underwear only. - Don’t die. That’s it. Three simple rules. Now you might be asking yourself, how does this solve the homeless problem? Well for one, the homeless population is reduced due to the deceased fighter, and secondly, I have not mentioned what the prize is for the winner. The organization will sell tickets to their exclusive event for a premium, but homeless get to watch for free! The winner gets the money made from the tickets, which would significantly aid the winner in escaping poverty and homelessness. It is unbelievable that no one has thought of such a revolutionary solution. There are so many outrageous benefits, such as, reducing the homeless population, bringing communities together, both homeless and non-homeless, providing entertainment, and creating an industry that has unlimited potential for growth that can bring in countless fans from around the globe to contribute the American economy. It’s a win-win-win! Let’s get it started! Who’s in? Now, I mentioned improving the American economy previously by bringing in fans from around the globe to contribute to the economy, and creating a new sector of the entertainment industry that could rival other successful organizations. This is another huge benefit, particularly because the American economy has suffered for the last few years, with rising interest rates, out of control inflation, crazy housing prices, massive raises in prices, and static wages. The awful state of the American economy is a huge reason for the increasing homeless population and unemployment rate. As mentioned earlier, the greatest contributor to the rising homeless population is unaffordable housing “The gap between housing supply and demand has driven up prices to the point where the poorest simply can no longer afford housing without public support.” (Maritz). So, why not invest in programs to build affordable housing? Well, Seattle and Kings County have designed programs to build affordable housing for almost 10 years. Between 2015 and 2020, the homeless population was slowly decreasing, but just in the last 5 years, the homeless population has been rampant and steadily increasing (Daniels), so that raises the question of whether these programs are effective or not. Based on current evidence, the state is draining its citizen’s tax dollars into a failing housing program, when those tax dollars could be used to benefit the middle class, or they could be used to support homeless cage fights. Not only would the investment be effective, but the monetary value also required to start homeless cage fighting is only a minor fraction of the current value that is being used to build affordable housing at a snail like rate. According to Jay Inslee, the Washington State governor, the affordable housing program has allocated more than $1.3 billion! (Inslee 12) I predict that it would take much less than $1 million to start homeless cage fights, and the potential of the industry lies in the hundreds of billions. After a few months of success, The Homeless Cage Fighting Organization should start a weapons sector, designing and prototyping weapons designed specifically for homeless cage fights. Not only does this allow fair fights between certain homeless people, therefore longer matches, and more entertainment, but it also creates a new industry for countless homeless to earn an income from. A weapons industry of such would provide experience to the homeless and give them an opportunity to display their unique skills that could be used in a more humanitarian setting. Not only does this new weapons industry bring jobs to countless less fortunate individuals, but it also allows investors to earn some cash. Homeless Weapons Inc. would go public on the market allowing everyone to earn a piece of this excitingly lucrative industry. The homeless issue is rampant within Seattle and Kings County and has only gotten worse within the last five years. The reason for the rising homeless rates is the outrageous housing prices, so, billion-dollar programs have been implemented by the Washington state government to build affordable housing, which have proven ineffective. An effective solution would be to start an industry, ran by homeless: Homeless Cage Fighting Inc. This organization would need only a fraction of the current fundings for homeless and has potential to tip the scales for the American economy, but most importantly, reduces the homeless population by reducing it. The homeless population is reduced by 2 homeless each match, because one participant is killed during the match, and the other is given a considerable sum to get back on their feet and afford a home. If the organization proves successful, it will provide entertainment to communities and bring them together. Homeless cage fighting would eventually introduce a weapons sector which would provide jobs for even more homeless to design and test weapons for cage fights. The US military could find some weapons effective in combat and invest into the homeless weapons industry, further increasing its monetary potential. Homeless cage fighting is not only the solution Seattle and Kings county is looking for, but the solution that America is looking for to solve its progressively worsening homeless population. Works Cited King’s County Dept. “Integrating Data to Better Measure Homelessness.” KC_DCHS_Cross_Systems_Homelessness_Analysis_Brief_12_16_2021_FINAL.ashx (kingcounty.gov). Accessed 15 Jan. 2024. Daniels, Chris. “Seattle Spent Nearly $1 Billion on Homelessness, but Number of Unsheltered Grew.” KOMO, 9 Apr. 2023, komonews.com/news/local/seattle-homeless-crisis-spent-abillion-dollars-on-homelessness-but-numbers-of-unsheltered-grew-washington-kingcounty-homeless-budget-money-citywide-spending-human-services-department-decadelabor-contract-state-of-emergency-organizations-people-living. Inslee, Jay. “Continued Momentum, Faster Construction Needed to Tackle Housing and Homelessness Crisis.” ofc.wa.gov, Dec. 2022, ofm.wa.gov/sites/default/files/public/budget/statebudget/highlights/budget23/Housing_H omelessness_Policy_Brief.pdf. Maritz, Benjamin, and Dilip Wagle. “Why Does Prosperous King County Have a Homelessness Crisis?” McKinsey & Company, 22 Jan. 2020, www.mckinsey.com/industries/publicsector/our-insights/why-does-prosperous-king-county-have-a-homelessness-crisis. Patrick, Anna. “‘That Number Is Unacceptable.’ WA’s Homeless Population Is Increasing.” The Seattle Times, 28 Mar. 2023, www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/homeless/washomeless- Topic: Homelessness in Seattle and King’s County (densest homeless population in the US) Satirical Proposal: Homeless cage fights to the death, winner gets cash prize. Tournament style? Last man standing? Weapons? Western? Tickets? National Sport? It provides an opportunity for homeless people to gain recognition and reputation, feel a sense of purpose. Introduction: How many homeless? Why is it bad? How are they trying to stop it and why is it not working? - Provide facts and bring to scale the problem. - Briefly discuss what is already being done to stop the problem and how it effects the middle class. 1st Body: Main Idea – An organization (ran mostly by homeless to give them jobs) should start to fund 1v1 cage matches against homeless people for a chance to win a large sum of money to get off the street. - Introduce proposal sarcastically and ensure the reader understands that it is simply to bring to scale how simple the issue could be by comparing it satirically to reasonable solutions. 2nd Body: Main Idea – Tournament style, large audience, becomes national sport, could even bring economical improvements to the United States - Begin to add thought out details about how it will work and exactly how fast it would solve the problem - Compare it to current solutions and show how it is the best one and most efficient 3rd Body: Main Idea – Start involving weapons, a new weapons industry (jobs for the homeless), fanbase, brings people together to root for a particular fighter! - Loosen up on the satire and propose rational solutions (compared to this proposal) that could be easily implemented and would significantly improve the issue. Conclusion: - Summarize the proposal and make sure the reader understands its ridiculousness. - Restate that homelessness is a huge problem and needs to be addressed in the right way and quickly because of the effect it has on society.
