What areas of the country had the highest number of divided families? During the Civil war many men of the family left to fight, leaving the women and children to take care of the occupations back home. Thousands of families were separated at this time, but border states such as Missouri, Kentucky. Delaware and Maryland had some of the most family separations. In addition, some Confederate states such as Virginia also had divided families. Why did thousands of Southern soldiers desert during the war? What happened to them if they were caught? Many soldiers ran away from the army in order to return and care for their families. The South greatly frowned upon this, and would sometimes punish those who ran with death while other times would be disciplined then return to their army duties. Why was the Civil War both a hardship but also an opportunity for African-American families? In order to further their fight, many African Americans fought in the Union Army. This left their families behind, creating hardship for them. The families had little education or experience to work and build a career. However, it was a great opportunity for families to reconnect with lost loved ones.