Emotional Intelligence…
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Emotions
•Spontaneous mental state
•Patterned
•Organismic reactions
•Accompanied by physiological changes
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Experience of Positive & Negative Emotions
Negative emotions (Goal incongruent):
- Anger
- Guilt/shame
- Envy/jealousy
- Fright/anxiety
- Sadness
- Disgust
Positive emotions (Goal congruent)
- Happiness/joy
- Pride
- Love/affection
- Relief
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Amygdala the seat of Emotions
Emotional brain is
seated in Amygdala
(limbic system),
situated on top of
brain stem.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
A Definition of Emotional Intelligence
2000 years ago Plato said, “All learning has an emotional
base”.
EI is the capacity:
•to recognize feelings: self & others,
•to motivate ourselves (work enjoyment, larger purpose) &
•to manage emotions (emotion as a resource needs to be
managed & channelized for productive purpose)
•to establish meaningful relationship with others.
-Goleman, 1998
Originally coined by two US psychologists, Peter Salovey & John Mayer
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Basics of Emotional Intelligence
Managing your emotional life:
– Knowing your feelings
– Persisting in the face of setbacks
– Empathy
– Handling feelings with skill & harmony
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Working with people means working with
Emotions
When people are
working at a common
place, emotions will
play a role.
Business
decisions,
should be based on
information, logic &
calm cool reason, with
emotions kept to a
minimum.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Why are organizations interested in EI?
• The ability to manage feelings & handle stress - has been found to be
important for success.
• Analysis of over 300 top-level executives from 15 global co.s found that 6
emotional competencies distinguished stars from average performers :






ability to Influence
team leadership,
organizational awareness,
self-confidence,
achievement drive, &
leadership
• EQ is a stronger predictor of success than experience or high IQ.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
IQ vs EQ
Conventional wisdom - IQ the largest determinant of success
It has been shown that a high IQ is no guarantee of success
Whereas a low EQ is a definite determinate of failure
IQ changes relatively little over lifespan
EQ can be learned & improved!
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Why EI Now?
• Changing nature of work
• Increasing complexity
• Rapid pace of change
• Rising stress levels
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Why EQ
EQ is the distinguishing factor that:
• help us to maintain a warm relationship or distant contacts.
• draws others to us or repels them.
• enables us to work in coordination with others or to create a
disputed situation.
• enables to win the heart of people or to win the situation by
argument.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Benefits of EQ
•
•
•
•
personal motivation
personal mastery over our life’s purpose & intention
empathy for others
social expertise that allows us to network & develop
relationships
• a tenacity to face & resolve both internal & external
conflict
• personal influence that enables us to advance our
purpose.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Needs Substantial
Development
Needs Some
Development
Definite
Strength
Self Awareness
25 or below
26 – 30
31 or above
Self Regulation
26 or below
27 – 31
32 or above
Motivation
26 or below
27 – 30
31 or above
Empathy
25 or below
26 – 30
31 or above
Social Skills
24 or below
25 – 29
30 or above
Total
130 or below
131 -154
155 or above
Emotional Competency
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
The 5 Components of EI at Work
Definition
Self-Awareness The ability to recognize & understand your moods, emotions,
& drives, as well as their effect on others
Self-Regulation
• The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses & moods
• The propensity to suspend judgment - to think before acting
Motivation
• A passion to work for reasons that go beyond money or
status
• A propensity to pursue goals with energy & persistence
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
The 5 Components of EI at Work (contd..)
Empathy
• The ability to understand the emotional makeup of
other people
• Skill in treating people according to their emotional
reactions
Social Skill
• Proficiency in managing relationships & building
networks
• An ability to find common ground & build rapport
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Use of EQ at Workplace
It is EQ that:
• will solve our retention & morale problems
• improve our creativity
• create synergy from teamwork
• speed information by way of sophisticated people networks
• drive our purpose
• & ignite the best & most inspired performance from our followers.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
How to Improve EI
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Good news about EI
• EI is much less fixed than IQ
• EI can develop over time
• Training, coaching, & feedback can
substantially improve EI
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Amygdala Hijack
– The routes from sensation to action are
depicted in this drawing of the brain.
– In the hijacked condition your brain is
flooded with electro-chemicals.
– The chemicals dissipate in 3-6 seconds.
– To minimize the damage from hijacking,
it is important to practice patterns which
lead to de-escalation.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Learning to be emotionally intelligent
Changing thoughts after the
moment of arousal can make
feelings easier to manage;
deep breathing can help
defuse destructive automatic
thoughts & facilitate return to
a comfortable level.
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Learning to be emotionally intelligent
Become Aware
of Your Flash
Points
2014/3/13
Elect an emotional
mentor
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Learning to be emotionally intelligent
Learning to be an
optimist
Building Resilience
Essential for maintaining motivation &
preventing burnout.
Although a +ve or -ve outlook is to some
extent part of inborn temperament,
optimism & hope can be learned
Self talk is a tool suggested for optimism
2014/3/13
a talk with a trusted friend,
a few minutes of fresh air or sunshine,
a healthy snack, some hot tea or your
favorite music
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Self-Awareness
The ability to see ourselves with our
own eyes, to be aware of our …
• Goals, immediate and long term
• Beliefs about ourselves and others
• Values, those things that we hold
dear
• Rules, that we live by, the shoulds,
musts and oughts
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Self-Awareness
You can identify the filters (hot buttons) that
trigger your emotions, and use this
information for a more positive outcome.
You can identify your emotional responses by:
Tuning into your senses
Getting in touch with your feelings
Knowing your goals
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Keeping a feeling (emotional) diary
Date/Time
Example
2014/3/13
Automatic thought(s)
What do you think?
Emotion(s)
How do you feel?
Response
What did you do?
Outcome(s)
What were the
consequences?
Describe
• Actual event
• Stream of thoughts,
daydream or recollections
leading to emotions
•Any physical sensations
Write down:
Thought that
preceded the
emotion(s)
Specify:
• Emotion (e.g/.
sadness, anxiety,
happiness)
Detail:
• What happened
• Presentation for the
Meeting
• I’ve really not had enough
time to prepare; it was
dropped to me at the last
moment
• Management
should have done
presentation
•I am going to blow it
•They are going to
see that it is not
clearly thought
through; it will be my
fault
• I’ll look like a fool
• Anxiety
• Fear
•Stomach churning;
pressure at back of
neck
• Just manage to get
through
• Presentation not
really convincing
• Asked to re-present
in a month
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Managing Our Emotions
• Controlling
unproductive
behaviour that does
not get us anywhere.
• Winning a shouting
match with a difficult
colleague is only a
short-term and
transitory gain.
• In addition, raising
your blood pressure is
not good for your
health in the long
term.
2014/3/13
• Instead, try to
understand the link
between your
interpretation of an
event and your
responses to it. You can
choose an alternative
way to feel.
• This is the key to EI
capability.
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Learn to live with worries
• Live one day at a time
• Practice the worry
buster technique
• Adopt the six-second
rule
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
When you become anxious or angry or worried about doing
something (e.g. a presentation), ask yourself the following questions
• What do I have to gain/if I
do/say this?
• What would be the worst
that could happen if I
do/don’t say or do this?
• What can I learn from
saying/doing this?
• Where is the
evidence for the
way I am
thinking?
• What is the logic
in my
interpretation?
• What do I have to
lose if I do/say
this?
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
The six-second rule
• Six seconds is
the time it takes
to capture the
fight or flight
response.
• When someone
has said or done
something
to
upset you, take a
deep breath and
count 6 seconds
before
you
respond.
2014/3/13
123456
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Why relationships fail?
• Unrealistic expectations
• Lack of empathy
• Dependency/codependency
• Poor communication
• Personality differences
(different maps of the
world)
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
10 tips for building exceptional relationships
with colleagues at work
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Appreciate their
individual skills,
knowledge &
capabilities
Take time to get to
know them
Actively listen to what
they say
Remember you can
have a good
relationship without
having to be their
best friend
Spend some social
time as well as work
time with them
2014/3/13
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Give +ve feedback for
a job well done
Seek their advice &
opinion whenever
you can
Support them
through tough times
Recognize individual
uniqueness, be
flexible in your style
& approach
Use common
courtesies & friendly
greetings
Tips for sharing thoughts, feelings and ideas
• Be in a good frame of mind
• Tune in to how the other person
responds
• Set a positive tone to the
discussion
• Check out any feelings of
discomfort
2014/3/13
• Remember when we
communicate our emotions:
• 55% is non-verbal (through our
body language)
• 38% is the tone of voice
• 7% is dependent on the content
(the actual words we use)
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI
Thank You
2014/3/13
Dr Mamta Mohapatra, IMI