Dr. Ohemaa Nkansa-Dwamena LSE Staff Counselling Service What is Emotional Resilience? Problems/Issues arising from low resilience Ways to Develop/Amend/Implement “The ability to succeed personally and professionally in the midst of a high pressured, fast moving and continuously changing environment” However….. Emotional resilient individuals are “individuals are characterised by a staunch view of reality. They are very logical in their interpretations of setbacks—what is in their control, out of their control, and options for taking action. Finally, this brain activity leads to the development of ‘‘realistic’’ optimism as well as the motivational processes involved for pursing the courses of action related to confidence and the strategies devised for overcoming life’s obstacles.” Emotional Awareness Perseverance Realism Internal Locus of Control Optimism Support Sense of Humour Perspective Low self esteem and confidence Stress Anxiety Negative thought patterns Altered sense of self Affected sleep Low motivation and enthusiasm Low morale Low productivity Perfectionism Pessimism Self criticism Lola is a member of staff in a busy information and advice centre. The centre is often understaffed and she is managed by a woman whom she describes as largely absent. Her manager makes great demands on her time and is at times critical of her work. She is beginning to become more and more stressed by her work environment, so much so that it affected her relationships. She works late and often goes home and falls asleep in her clothes, her sleep is often disrupted. As a result of feeling vulnerable, she is short with her family and easily irritated. Based on what we have explored so far, what would you advise Lola to do in order to improve her situation and develop emotional resilience? Some individuals are naturally more resilient than others- however the good news is, emotional resilience can be learned and developed. Emotional resilience is made up of different components, and particularly in a work setting it is important to attend to the different areas, continuing to develop as you grow in your work role Self awareness Self management Social Awareness Relationship Management Know the warning signs Improve your self esteem Enjoy Yourself Develop good relationships Find a sense of purpose Nurture Yourself Change is good! Good health and easy temperament Secure attachment and basic trust in other people Interpersonal competence including the ability to recruit help Cognitive competence that encompasses the ability to read, capacity to plan, self efficacy and intelligence Emotional competencies include diverse emotional skills including the ability to regulate one’s emotion, maintain realistically high self esteem and employ creativity and humour to one’s benefit The ability and opportunity to contribute to others Holding faith that your life matters and has meaning, including a moral sense of connection to others. People are already resilient in areas of their lives linked to passionate interests, committed values or small daily never miss activities. However, people are frequently unaware of their strengths. Adaptive strengths are important for emotional resilience Ask question: What is something you do everyday because you really want to do it? Generate strengths Construct PMR Turn specific strategies used whilst working on something on which you demonstrate/ maintain resilience into more general resilience strategies. How could PMR help to maintain resilience in areas of difficulty? Write down common challenges in problem areas/ consider. Then scan PMR for ideas which might help them persist in the face of obstacles, and/or accept aspects of the situation that cannot be changed. The focus is staying resilient in the face of difficulty rather than solving or overcoming them. Practice Resilience Devise behavioural experiments to practice resilience. These are used to test the quality and utility of PMR. Debriefing a behavioural experiment lends a chance to see things through a resilience lens- obstacles and setbacks become opportunities to learn and practice resilience Resilience practice not only helps people manage difficulties, it minimizes the number of life events that are experienced as aversive. Search for strengths Construct a personal model of resilience Apply the PMR to areas of life /work difficulty Practice resilience Take a Self-Esteem Inventory. Mastery/learning goals vs. performance goals. Stop thinking that you need better than average at everything to have worth. See setbacks as an opportunity to be kind to yourself. Set Aside Perfection and Grab a Hold of Accomplishments… and Mistakes. Set Realistic Expectations. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others. Get Organized Put important things first. This is the habit of self- management. It involves organizing and managing time and events around personal priorities. Develop clear values and a sense of purpose. Rehearse Being prepared reduces stress. When you're facing a situation that you know will be stressful to you, rehearse it mentally or with a friend. Anticipate what might occur and plan your response. Do It Now Procrastination breeds stress! Do your most difficult task at the beginning of the day when you're fresh; avoid the stress of dreading it all day. Put Perfectionism in its Proper Place Perfectionism is often a poor use of time. Not everything requires perfection. High priority items require more perfection than low priority items. By demanding perfection of yourself and others, you may be wasting time in unnecessary effort. Change Attitudes Think of stressful situations as a challenge to your creative thinking, rather than looking at them as insurmountable problems . Generate solutions. Learn to Say "No" Say "no" when your schedule is full: to responsibilities that aren't yours; to emotional demands that leave you feeling exhausted; to other people's problems that you don't have the power to solve. Take Care of your Body You will have more energy and become stress hardy when you eat a balanced diet, get sufficient sleep and exercise regularly. Optimistic Self-Talk Use positive self-reinforcement: "I can handle this one step at a time", instead of frightening or depressing yourself by coming up with reasons why you can't cope. Support Actively seek support from friends, colleagues, and family. Take Charge Take responsibility for making your life what you want it to be . It is more empowering to feel a sense of control and to make decisions. Commit to what you want and take action. Develop problem solving skills Establish Goals Take steps to solve problems Sleep Hygiene Be Active Connect with the people around you Take Notice Keep Learning Give back Black and White Thinking: views things as one extreme or the other- no middle ground ERR: Practice noticing when you have a strong good/bad - right/wrong response to something or someone Choose not to attach a judgement to the situation and consider what may be a middle path of acceptance- not agreeing or disagreeing, simply observing you have a response and can choose to let it pass Setting Unrealistic Expectations: Inflexible rules, goals and high expectations. Perfection and always in control. I must. I have to. ERR: Catch yourself when you are using shoulds, must, and have to’s. How can you reframe the statement so it is less emotionally charged? E.g. I prefer to, he could consider, she may like to know Looking on the dark side-Pessimistic thinking: Looking at the world through dark coloured glasses- dwelling on unpleasant event or seeing the bad in a situation/ person. Only bad things happen ERR: Choose to make a conscious effort to think of one positive thing every time you find yourself focused on a negative thought or judgement. Help others. Overgeneralization: This is when you believe because one thing has gone wrong in the pastyou assume that everything else will be a disaster too. ERR: Become aware of our language, how often do you engage in negative self talk? Make an effort to stop labelling and judging yourself. Imagine an alternative outcome Making Mountains out of molehills: This occurs when you focus on something that may be uncomfortable or unpleasant experience for anyone and you exaggerate these feelings. ERR: Review the situation and ask yourself whether you are exaggerating the impact of a mistake or setback. Decide to let it go so you can focus on the future. Catastrophising: This is when situations are turned into life or death issue ERR: 80-90 % of the things we worry about never happen. Remember human beings are resilient, and are remarkably adept. Recall a time when you have demonstrated this. Personalising: It’s all my fault. This means you assume responsibility and blame yourself for anything unpleasant ERR: Try not to assume responsibility for someone else care about others and their feelings and empower them to take responsibility for their own feelings and behaviours. Developing your emotional resilience by Donald Robertson Developing Resilience: A cognitive behavioural approach: Michael Neenan Emotional Resilience by M.D. Viscott Just one thing\; Developing a Bhuddha brain one simple practice at a time by Rick Hanson LSE Staff counselling service (intranet, email: staff.counselling@lse.ac.uk, or phone us on 02079556963)