How Teens Reach Out to Adults
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Sometimes teens are very direct when they
want your attention. “I need to talk with
you.” “Can you and I go to the park
tomorrow?” “Watch this movie with me.”
Teens don’t always tell us in words that
they need our attention. Sometimes they
show us indirectly through their behaviors.
We just have to know what to look for.
How Teens Reach Out to Adults
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EXAMPLES
 Eddie sits next to his father in the den when he
needs to talk, but he does not say anything until
his father says “What’s on your mind?”
 Janet cooks breakfast on the weekend for her
parents when she wants to spend time with
them.
 Frank goes to his uncle’s workplace after school
when he wants to spend time with uncle Mike.
How Teens Reach Out to Adults
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Teens differ in how they reach out to their
parents and other adults. How does your
teen do it?
When are the times that your teen reaches
out to you?
Is there a difference in how your teen
reaches out when she just wants to connect
with you compared to when she’s having a
problem?
How Teens Reach Out to Adults
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By spending a little time each day with
your teen, even if it is just straightening
up a room together or having a meal,
you have an invaluable window into
your teen’s life.
Sometimes your teen’s life might
become stressful and your teen may
need help to deal with a problem.
Reasons Teens Need Help
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Stress, anger and/or depression
resulting from life’s difficulties, such as:
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Academic problems.
Problems with family members, peers,
close friends or dating partners.
Problems with teachers or supervisors.
Worries about the future.
Teens and Depression
Why teens may be depressed: Stress
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Teens like adults experience stress in their lives.
Teens often feel most stressed by situations they see as
outside of their control.
These situations can be anything from frustrations and
demands at school to, moving, to problems with friends
or even the death of a loved one.
Teens like adults can sometimes feel overwhelmed by
the stressors in their lives.
Unlike adults however, teens may not yet have a means
of coping with this stress.
How Parents Can Help
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Realize that teen stress is something to be
taken seriously.
Watch to see if stress is affecting the teen’s
health, behavior, thoughts or feelings.
Listen carefully to your teen and watch for
signs of overload.
Learn and Model stress management skills.
Support your teens involvement in extracurricular pro-social activities.
How teens can manage their stress
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Exercise and eat regularly
Watch out for excess Caffeine intake which can lead to
anxiety and agitation
Learn relaxation exercises
Learn to be assertive rather than aggressive or passive
Learn coping skills such as breaking large problems into
smaller parts
Decrease negative talk and thoughts into more positive
ways of thinking
Learn to feel good about doing a good job
Take breaks from stressful situations
Build a supportive network of friends
When stress becomes to much
Signs your teen may be depressed
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If these symptoms last 2 or more weeks your
teen may be depressed:
Consistently sleeping more or less than usual
Frequent and lengthy bouts of anger
Chronic boredom
Inability to focus or think clearly
Loss of interest in things formerly enjoyed
Withdrawing from friends and Family
Sexual Promiscuity
Depression can lead to Thoughts
of Suicide
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These signs when they occur together
may indicate suicidal thoughts
Drug or Alcohol abuse
Giving away possessions
Preoccupation with death
Feelings of Despair
Self abusive behavior
Overwhelming expressions of guilt or shame
If you think your teen is having
thoughts of suicide……
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Get your teen talking: encourage them to talk about how
they are feeling, don’t be afraid to ask if they have thought
about suicide
Assess the danger: determine if they have developed a plan
and a way to carry out the plan. If they have it’s serious.
Don’t preach: This is a time when your child needs to know
that you care and are there to LISTEN to them.
Don’t minimize feelings: whatever your teen is feeling is
serious to them, even if it doesn’t seem so to you.
Take action: If you feel your teen is in danger, contact a
suicide help line, a mental health professional or your local
clergy. DON’T WAIT.