Healthy Relationships
Objectives:
To
understand components of a healthy
relationship
State
what is important to YOU in a
relationship – values and opinions
Articulate
concrete ways to improve
upon negative situations and improve
relationships.
Relationships
When I am with someone
else I need to feel:
________________.
A relationship is a bond or connection
you have with other people.
Evaluating a Relationship Activity
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The purpose of this activity is to
heighten awareness of what constitutes
a good relationship and to help you
learn how to evaluate your own
relationships.
Use this worksheet to evaluate any type
of relationship including a romantic
relationship, friendship, or family
relationship.
Think of a relationship, past or present,
that is important to you and use this
worksheet to evaluate that relationship.
Scoring Your Worksheet
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One point for each “yes” response
to questions 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 11, 12,
13 and 14.
One point for each “no” response
to questions 1, 5, 7, 8 and 10.
What does the score mean?
1-3:


There are few constructive elements in this
relationship. You may want to think about
your reasons for continuing the relationship,
or work toward improving it.
4-6:
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
This relationship has problems that might be
resolved by working on honesty and
communication.
7-10:
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
There is the basis for a good relationship.
Focus on the positive elements and work on
improving the destructive ones.
10-14:
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
You're doing well and have what it takes to
build a successful and satisfying relationship.
Traits of a healthy relationship
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Mutual respect
Caring
Honesty
Commitment
Three C’s of healthy relationships
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Communication
Cooperation
Compromise
Codependent Relationships
Codependency – making the relationship
more important to you than you are to
yourself
 Trying to make the relationship work
with someone else who’s not trying
Behaviors of codependent people:
 Low self esteem
 Fixers
 People pleasers
 Fear abandonment
Relationships

Healthful
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Promotes mutual respect, productivity,
and health (physical, emotional, mental
and social)
Free of violence, harmful behaviors,
and drug use
Harmful
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Harms self respect, interferes with
productivity and health (physical,
emotional, mental, and social)
Includes violence and/or drug abuse,
harmful behaviors
Harmful Relationship Profiles
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People Pleaser
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Seeks approval
Does anything to be liked
Acts like a “doormat”
The Enabler

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Supports harmful behavior of others
Makes excuses for behavior of others
Takes over other peoples
responsibilities
Harmful Relationship Profiles
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The Clinger
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Needy and dependent
Chases and clings
Suffocates others
The Fixer

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Fixes other peoples problems
Quick to give advice
Takes over other peoples
responsibilities
Harmful Relationship Profiles
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The Distancer
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The Controller
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Emotionally unavailable
Avoids sharing feelings
Keeps people at an arms length away
Possessive, jealous, and domineering
Does not respect the will of others
Demands one way
The Center
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Self centered
Talks but does not listen
Ignores the needs of others
Harmful Relationship Profiles
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The Abuser
 Abusive
 Puts down others
 Threatens and harms others
The Liar
 Does not tell the truth
 Builds relationships on lies
 Manipulates others into responses they want
The Promise Breaker
 Unreliable
 Makes plans and cancels them
 Agrees to change behavior and does not do so