Past, Present, and Future
Spring Break
Smittcamp Scoop March 2012
A Fond Easter
Memory
BY: JENNA
MERSEREAU,
SOPHOMORE
My story
wouldn’t
be
complete
without a
description
of the
Easter bunny. Since no one
has ever seen this elusive
rodent, I suppose everyone
pictures the Easter bunny a
little bit differently. Personally,
I imagine the Easter bunny as
a human-sized rabbit that hops
on its hind legs while using its
forelegs to hold a basket filled
with delectable treats. It’s a lot
like those grown people who
dress up as the Easter bunny
in shopping malls who hold
terrified little children for
pictures.
Back in the day when I was
one of those terrified little
children, I harbored a healthy
belief, fear, and respect for
the Easter bunny. My parents,
who claimed they were in
contact with Santa, the tooth
fairy, and the Easter bunny,
were my source of knowledge
on how to properly interact
with them in the hopes that
each would bring me
something nice.
I was told Easter etiquette was
to stay in bed Easter morning.
If I went out and scared the
bunny, he might leave before
he was done filling my basket
(since the Easter bunny, like all
bunnies, is easily startled). As
a kid who only got one candy
for dessert each night after
dinner, I was sure to do all I
could to load up on candy
when I could, and that meant
choosing to wait in bed until
the Easter bunny was good
and done filling my basket.
With this in mind, one Easter
morning some time before I
was 8, I had woken up early
in anticipation. I remember
being hyper-awake, but not
daring to leave my bed until I
got the ‘all-clear’ from my
parents. During this waiting
period, however, I heard a lot
of magical mojo go down.
And I must add that, in my
state of excitement, my senses
were ultra-keen, so I am sure
this is exactly what happened.
Everyone except for me was
asleep in the house and it was
perfectly quiet, but the silence
was broken by the sound of
the front door opening. Then, I
heard the muffled sound of a
heavy creature with furry feet
hopping across my front tile.
Next was the sound one
makes when they mess around
with that plastic grass that
goes in an Easter basket,
followed by the cracking of
plastic eggs, the tinkle of
coins, and the rattle of jelly
beans. The tile-hopping sound
happened again, and the front
door shut.
Maybe an hour later, I heard
my parents get up and they
came over to my room to tell
me the coast was all clear.
When I went out to check my
basket, sure enough, the eggs
were filled with coins and jelly
beans!!
I will let everyone come to
their own conclusion about this
tale, but I think the most
interesting thing that I learned
from this experience is that,
unlike Santa who uses the
chimney, the Easter bunny
prefers using the front door.
My World 2.0
REVIEW BY: SHAE DOUGAL,
FRESHMAN
I am not a teenage
girl. Now that we have that out of
the way, let’s throw all of my
other biases and preconceptions
out of the window. Some people
really like Justin Bieber. Now,
there must be a reason. I’m going
to give “My World 2.0” an
honest look in this article.
The album kicks off
with “Baby”, which kind of
sounds like The Jackson 5 if they
did weird hip-hop songs.
Everyone in the whole world
knows this song, so I don’t have
to say too much about it. Some
lyrical thought would have been
nice. Costello’s “Beyond Belief”
this is not; it’s cringe--worthy to
hear Bieber sing about buying his
baby a ring. It’s actually kind of
cute in a way…young unrequited
love. But it’s also so, so bad. The
Ludacris breakdown literally
made me laugh out loud; the spot
is so hilariously out of place that
it’s great.
The next song,
“Somebody to Love”, is a
throwaway. It wasn’t able to keep
my attention, and I found my
mind wandering. Already,
however, I am beginning to see
why people find themselves
attracted to Bieber’s work. It
exudes a sort of strange hypnosis,
some subliminal message that
preteen girls can’t resist. Sort of
like me and cheese steaks.
“Stuck in the Moment”
reminded me of something I had
heard before by a different artist,
but I couldn’t place it. I liked this
one more than “Somebody”, but
once again, a bit of a throwaway.
Bieber has a decent vocal range,
but I bet I can go lower than him,
and at least as high in terms of
pitch. Just saying.
“U Smile” was next.
Opening with a nice piano solo,
this song faltered from the
moment it slid into a heavily
overproduced doo-wop feel. I
don’t know if I’ve ever heard a
worse bass drum sound in music.
Not even Blue Öyster Cult’s
“Club Ninja”. The bass thud
reminds me of the sound of me
banging my head against the
wall. That’s all I have to say
about this one.
By this point I was
becoming a bit disillusioned with
the album. “Runaway Love” was
next. I liked the groove, but it was
interrupted and ruined rather
quickly by that hip-hop glissando
where all the instruments drop out.
Sorry, I’m not hip to pop music
lingo. I don’t know if it has an
official term or not, but I hate that.
Other than that, it wasn’t bad.
Listenable.
“Never Let You Go”?
Same mold as “Runaway Love”.
Simple groove, hideous bass, you
know. It’s a song about angels
taking Bieber to heaven. I’d rather
the angels were trying to wear my
red shoes, to be honest.
“Overboard” and
“Eenie Meenie” were both duets
with Bieber and some people I
didn’t recognize. “Overboard”
was actually really good, with its
orchestral themes and sweeping
crescendos. “Eenie Meenie” was
horrible. Not even worth a second
mention.
“Up” was kind of
depressing, and perhaps the
simplest song on the record, mixwise. Despite this, it actually made
the tune better. It reminds me of
some of Michael’s slower numbers.
In fact, there are a lot of parallels
with Michael Jackson’s music that I
could discuss with a lot of these
tunes.
The last song was “That
Should Be Me”, and it drew
themes from “Overboard”, which I
liked. It was essentially a
combination of the inverted
drumrolls of “Rock You Like a
Hurricane“, the acoustic of
“Go” (by a band called
Steriogram), and the odd middle
march of “Bring the Boys Back
Home”, which made for a pretty
epic combination. It even has an
obligatory key change when the
songwriters realized that they were
repeating the chorus way too
many times.
Overall, this isn’t the
second coming of pop music that
so many preteens claim. But
really? It’s not as bad as all “real
music fans” immediately label it. I
certainly don’t ever plan on
listening to it again, because it’s
not my stuff, but I’m glad that for
once in my life I was able to set
aside my bias and give something
a chance for once. Not a great
album, but a good life experience.
My score shall hopefully indicate
this:
Justin Bieber: “My World 2.0”4.5/10
Occupy <Your Name
Here> and the GOP
campaign: Clutching
at Straws
BY: ABHIJIT SUPREM,
FRESHMAN
We’ve seen the Occupy
campaign kick off. We’ve all
heard the hype and the
(seemingly) huge amount of
support it has. The question to
ask is, does it really do any
good? Do its policies actually fix
problems, or are they just cries
for attention? And if we are on
the topic of reform and
attention, why not also drag in
the GOP campaigners into this?
We have the playing field now.
On one side, the ferocious,
feral, furious Occupy protesters.
On the other side, the
conservative, cunning, collected
Romney, Ron Paul, Newt
Gingrich, and Rick Santorum.
Since Ron Paul has not been
fairing well in the polls, and is a
really old dude, let’s not put
him in the match we’re about to
create. Let’s take a look at these
two sides, and how eerily
similar they are, even though
they believe in separate ideas.
First point of interest - their
focus. The Occupy protest has
managed to connect with very
few people. How many of you
think you, as part of the
working class/middle class
(albeit students) can manage
the federal system? It is very
difficult to actually do the job.
The people who are in charge
are there because they can
actually manage the system.
What the Occupy movement
should be focusing on is fixing
the system, rather than ousting
allegedly inept officials. They
lack focus, an Achilles heel for
any aspiring movement. If we
were to look at the GOP side,
we would see the same thing.
Mitt Romney, in his recent
speeches, drones on and on
about cars he drove and how
much he loves cars. We get it.
You like them.Now get on with
it. Or maybe, he has a guilty
conscience (cue “Let Detroit go
bankrupt”)? Or, more likely, he
isn’t really sure what to say, and
so is trying to draw in voters
with sympathy. Rick Santorum,
on the other hand, embodies an
entirely different spectrum of
unfocused campaigning. He has
somehow confused the
Constitution with theology,
democracy with religion, and free
speech as non-separation of
church and state. It is this
incoherent bumbling that reduces
the weight of the Republican
party. Perhaps some of you
support Santorum for his strict
ideals. That’s fine. Just, keep the
church out of it. Onto Gingrich.
He is a great speaker. However,
he isn’t that great at connecting to
people. He has never quiet made
clear what his positions are, which
is why most Americans do not
connect with him.
Let’s head on over to validity. The
Occupy protesters seem to think
they are right in defining
themselves as the 99%. This could
not be wronger. First of all, people
don’t think like that. Even though
statistically, what they say may be
true, people just don’t think so. A
study shows that 99% of people
do NOT think they are part of the
99%. Rather, it is more along the
lines of 30% think they are 99%.
That’s not valid at all. Looking at
the Republicans, we can also find
these parallels. Mitt Romney keeps
saying he cares about the
American people, that he is an
agent of job creation, that he
wants to fix America. Who then
was it that sacrificed his political
career to keep a million jobs in the
auto industry, even as Republicans
(and some Democrats) vehemently
opposed it, saying it would
destroy the country? President
Obama. On the other hand, who
said he had created 100,000 jobs,
a claim that was both “phony and
unverifiable?” (The New Yorker).
Mitt Romney. Moving on to Rick
Santorum, he keeps talking about
how he wants to represent
America and lead it. Heads up,
but America is a melting pot of all
faiths and traditions, not just
Christian. ‘Nuff said. As for
Gingrich, I’m going to bring up a
sorely contested idea here: if he
cannot remain truthful to his wife
(s), after making promises to be
by her side “until death do them
part” on the Bible, can he remain
truthful to the nation’s cabinet
after swearing upon the Bible? It’s
for you to decide.
There are certain parallels we can
draw between the Occupy
protesters and the Republican
candidates, which is not to say
they are alike. They aren’t. But it is
strange that one can find some
similarities, just like there are
similarities between Presidents
Lincoln and Kennedy. Some food
for thought.
Yes, I’ve Caught
Linsanity Too!
By: Nick Vizenor, Junior
February and into early
March is known as a notoriously
slow time in sports. The Super
Bowl is over, baseball has yet to
start, and March Madness is not
quite here yet. However, as if
right on cue, one man made the
past few weeks a whole lot more
exciting. His name, a name
everyone now knows, is Jeremy
Lin. Lin, a point guard for the
New York Knicks who came out
of nowhere to become the feel
good story of the year, has
sparked renewed interest in the
NBA for many fans, myself
included. A perennial bench
warmer, Lin was a nobody who
got put in to start for the Knicks
out of desperation; the Knicks
had been hit by the injury bug
and needed a healthy body to
play. Lin made the most of his
opportunity scoring 25 points in
his first start and a few nights
later, became a sensation by
hitting a long 3 pointer just
before the buzzer to clinch a
victory over the Raptors. Linsanity
was born, and in an otherwise
boring dreary February, the
nation and the world had a new
star.
In today’s NBA filled with
egos, super teams, and “The
Decision” hour long special, most
of the storylines associated with
basketball coverage are off the
court in nature. Lin brought to the
nation a true love for the game
and humility. Lin didn’t go to a
powerhouse D-1 college and
leave after one year for the NBA
draft. He went to Harvard, got
his degree, and went undrafted
after school. He took the hard
route to stardom, persevering
and playing the role of bench
warmer until he finally got his
shot. This is why I am so happy
for Lin and have caught Linsanity
myself. He is different, and a
breath of fresh air for what has
become a rather stale NBA filled
with Lebron claiming to ignore his
haters and Dwight Howard
constantly complaining about
Orlando. Lin is known for his
game, and skills, not his big
mouth; he is real, and honest. He
brought us all back to athletics
and the true meaning of sports.
So here’s to Jeremy Lin, enjoy the
moment: you deserve it!
Easter Break
(AN EXPLORATION IN POETRY STYLES)
BY: PARKER, NALCHAJIAN
Haiku
Everyone’s week off
Spend time with friends? Vacation?
I think I will sleep
Acrostic
Sun to laze around in
Parties to attend
Running and playing
Ignoring school work
Needing sleep
Getting far more than school ever allowed
But the term is rapidly ending
Right around the corner
Exam time
Almost, not just yet
Keep relaxing a little longer
Limerick
In April, there comes our Spring Break
That week off we gladly will take
The death of our Christ
It cannot be priced
Life given for everyone’s sake.
Shape Poetry (Concrete)
Jesus Christ,
Son of God.
All at once
Man and God,
He took upon himself the burden of man’s sin
He died on that cross so that each of us lives
Three days later, he rose triumphant from his tomb.
The good news
of God’s Love
and his victory
told at Easter
reminds us that
we owe it all
to God; Jesus
He died for you
He died for me
for that, I will live
For his glory.