RELATIONSHIPS
Compass
Build healthier, supportive
relationships
Good relationships take work and require continual attention,
care and nourishment. The fruits of that work, however, can be
stronger relationships that are supportive and resilient.
When you’re in a friendship or romantic relationship, it’s tempting to think
that your interactions will automatically go smoothly. But that’s rarely the
case, even when we have much in common with the other person.
Since so much in life changes every day, even the best of relationships
require that each party dig in and do some work. This often means listening
well, helping to solve problems, and regularly assessing whether you’re
being as responsive as possible to the other person’s needs—in both good
times and bad.
In Compass for February, we’ll explore ways in which you can:
• Use active listening as a basis for healthy communication in your
relationships.
• If you’re a parent, employ specific communication strategies appropriate
for each stage of your child’s life.
• Begin repairing a friendship if it has become strained or broken.
Log on and learn! Look for Relationships on the Magellan member website
and click on the Relationships box that appears at the top of the website.
You will find tools and information that can help you build stronger ties
with the people around you.
Go Online to Access
More Information!
P
T
o
C
w
byg
e
)d
P
o
e
rw
D
.(cp
w
F
d
ftw.
Log on to MagellanHealth.com/member today!
Successful communication
starts with listening
Are you a good listener? Listening
can actually be more difficult than
talking because it requires us to delay
expressing our own opinions. In fact,
everyone can learn to listen better, and
this can help improve relationships.
Here are some listening tips.
• Maintain eye contact in a
manner that is culturally
appropriate for you.
• Show you’re paying close
attention by leaning forward and
making nonverbal gestures like
nodding your head.
• Don’t interrupt even when you
disagree or have something to
share. Take a moment to pause
and consider the other person’s
statement.
• Ask questions if you haven’t fully
grasped the message.
• Briefly paraphrase the other
person’s statement to show your
understanding and get clarity. For
example, say, “It sounds like you’re
saying that _______. Is that right?”
Communicating with
children at specific ages
One of the most valuable gifts that adults can provide
to children is to talk with and listen to them every day.
Communicating effectively with your children as they develop
through each stage of life will benefit the whole family.
Infants
Speak softly and hold them gently. Use a higher pitched voice because
babies respond to that. Talk to them about the world around them and
how important they are. Respond when they coo and babble—that is their
language.
Toddlers
Provide names for things that children see or do, and begin to help them
label their emotions. For example, “I see it makes you happy when Mommy
comes home.” Ask your toddler questions and listen to their answers
without interrupting.
Preschoolers
Your child probably has a lot to say now. Continue to listen and be
responsive to their questions. Respect their feelings when they express
them and do not dismiss them as unimportant. Continue to help them learn
how to label their feelings.
School-age children
The child’s life is taking on more complexity now. Friends are becoming
very important to them, so make those friendships a frequent topic of
conversation. Talk about what your children like and don’t like. Help them
learn to develop empathy towards others.
Teens
Continue to show an active interest in your teen’s life. Almost all teens
become less communicative, so you may have to creatively initiate
conversations. Ask questions and listen carefully as they express
themselves before you provide your opinion—which may differ
substantially from theirs. Always keep in mind the many physical,
psychological and social changes teens are undergoing.
S-EL70E (2/15) ©2015 Magellan Health, Inc.
How to fix a friendship
Take the initiative and meet face-toface. If you’ve grown apart, make the
first move toward healing. Tell the
other person how much you value
and miss their friendship and that
you would like to talk.
Apologize regardless of the
circumstances. Even if a prior
misunderstanding was not your fault,
reach out and extend a heartfelt
apology for what went wrong. Doing
so without expecting anything
in return can help rebuild the
friendship.
Listen to your friend’s viewpoint.
Without interrupting, give them
plenty of space to provide their
perspective on the issues.
Create an action plan. After you have
both addressed the relationship
challenges, think of ways to avoid
such problems in the future and
move forward with your friendship.