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Sarah Rea
AP English Language and Composition
Mr. Lane
5.8.11
Research Argument: Cinderella Ate My Daughter
The Common Girlie-Girl Culture
Section I:
“‘Princess’ is how we express our aspirations, hopes, and dreams for [little girls].
‘Princess’ is the wish that we could protect them from pain, that they would never know
sorrow, that they will live happily ever after ensconced in lace and innocence” (Orenstein 81).
Though this is a nice objective it is not necessarily reasonable, as the author Peggy Orenstein
knows only too well. At this point in time girls are growing up much faster than they used to.
By the age of three they are already playing with Barbies, which were created for the eight to
twelve demographic (Orenstein 47), they are dressing to imitate their older siblings and role
models, such as Miley Cyrus, and they are consuming numerous forms of media at a particularly
young age. The challenge of raising girls has grown even larger and many parents are not
aware of the effects of the girlie-girl culture. Children are so easily influenced by their
surroundings, and it is important for them to be surrounded by good role models and attitudes.
Peggy Orenstein tackles these issues in Cinderella Ate My Daughter, an influential and
inspirational book that digs deeper into the difficulties of being, or raising, a girl.
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Section II:
Writer, journalist, guest speaker, and mother of one, Peggy Orenstein is very respected
when it comes to the broad topic of girls. For nearly two decades Orenstein has explored the
way girls are raised, the differences between the media consumed by girls and boys, and the
girlie-girl culture in general (Orenstein 1). Not only has Orenstein written several books on
these matters, including SchoolGirls and Waiting For Daisy, she is a contributing writer to the
New York Times Magazine (Orenstein). Orenstein, who is very dedicated to her work, gained
the experience necessary to write Cinderella Ate My Daughter by traveling to important “road
stops” in the life of a girl and meeting with historians, psychologists, and scientists. By traveling
to American Girl Place, the American International Toy Fair, Toys “R” Us, a Miley Cyrus Concert,
and a child’s beauty pageant, Orenstein gained important insight into what girls go through on
a daily basis. In addition, she talked to marketers who explained how they lure girls into their
stores, scientists who explained the differences between boy’s and girl’s minds, and
psychologists who analyzed what media messages tell girls about their bodies. Furthermore,
Orenstein has a daughter, Daisy, whom has struggled with the trials of girlhood just as almost
every other girl has (Orenstein). Not only does Orenstein know her facts, both through science
and observation, but she has gained experience by raising her own daughter in our modern
society.
Section III:
How dangerous is pink and pretty anyway? What’s wrong with letting your little girl
think she’s a princess? According to Peggy Orenstein the stakes are higher than any of us ever
imagined, specifically because the girlie-girl culture has the power to affect the development,
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health, and future of modern girls (Orenstein 1). To prove her point, Orenstein journeys to
explore princesses and the color pink, the impact of playing with dolls such as Barbie or Bratz,
the possibilities of early sexualization, how girls are altered by their role models, and the trials
of beauty and body image. By revealing the dark side of pink and pretty, Orenstein makes
parents aware of the negative impact of this new girlie culture:
I didn’t know whether Disney Princesses would be the first salvo in a Hundred Years’
War of dieting, plucking, and painting (and perpetual dissatisfaction with the
results). But for me they became a trigger for the larger question of how to help our
daughters with the contradictions they will inevitably face as girls, the dissonance
that is as endemic as ever to growing up female (Orenstein 8.)
In making this comment Peggy Orenstein motivates an evaluation of how girls can be affected
by the images and social norms that society, especially the media and marketers, push on them.
Along with evidence based in science and reasoning, Orenstein develops a stronger bond with
the reader by providing personal anecdotes to several parenting scenarios. By opening up
each topic with a personal experience or personal observation, she makes it evident to readers
that she has gone through, and is still going through, the same struggles and trials of
parenthood. While being personable when writing can be effective, it is still important to be
professional and calm at the same time. When voicing her opinion, Orenstein occasionally
went off into rants about the trials of girlhood. While the rants still pronounced Orenstein’s
opinion to her audience, I consider them a weakness because they showed a lack of control.
Although a sporadic lack of control detracted from Orenstein’s writing, she gained momentum
by appealing to her audience through descriptive data and statistics. By appealing to statistics
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in her writing, Orenstein backs up her opinion with facts that can be proven and applied.
Orenstein relies on data when discussing the neurological damage girlhood encourages and
when acknowledging the effect of pop culture and the media. By introducing statistical
information, such as how many tickets were sold to Miley/Hannah’s 2007 Best of Both Worlds
Tour, Orenstein allows the audience to fully analyze the amount of media being consumed by
young children, especially girls. In addition to statistics and data, Orenstein also uses emotion
to appeal to her audience. Any parent might become emotional when talking about the
struggles of their children. Talking about the pressure society exerts on girls to be pretty, thin,
and perfect in almost every form of the word may evoke sadness in some adults, caused by the
fact that young girls should not be worrying about their outside image at such a young age. It is
not always difficult to make people emotional in a negative way; however, the real task is to
take the hurt and sadness you evoke and turn it into something inspirational. Examples of
motivational writing can be found scattered all throughout Orenstein’s writing. “I’m not saying
we can, or will, do everything “right,” only that there is power—magic—in awareness. If we
start with that, with wanting girls to see themselves from the inside out rather than outside in,
we will go a long way toward helping them find their true happily-ever-afters” (Orenstein 192).
Reassuring quotes such as this one give Cinderella Ate My Daughter a hopeful tone rather than
an irascible one.
Section IV:
Peggy Orenstein has a very strong opinion on the impacts of the girlie-girl culture. In
fact, a majority of professional writers, scientists, and psychologists agree that girls are held to
sometimes impossible standards when it comes to the realm of beauty and the concept of
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being perfect. However, there are opposing views when it comes to what actually does
influence small girls in a negative way. Does Barbie cause girls to feel insecure about the
shapes of their own bodies? Are eating disorders genetic, or are they results of media images?
Do beauty pageants give girls confidence or instill a crippling need to be perfect? For over fifty
years now Barbie has been a very popular doll for young girls (Orenstein 46). While Orenstein
sees Barbie as a toy that promotes sexualization many others disagree (Orenstein 47). In the
book The Good, The Bad, and The Barbie, author Tanya Stone discusses her own positive views
of Barbie as well as the views of other women who were positively influenced by this plastic
role model: “How Barbie looked was never the issue. Not to the girls who loved her. It was
what she taught us that mattered. And what she taught us was that, like Barbie, we could be
anything we wanted to be. So that’s exactly what we all became” (Stone 3). To Stone, Barbie
was a doll that allowed girls to envision their futures. While mothers looked at Barbie with
scorn for her womanly figure, Stone argues that girls just saw a sophisticated woman who could
fulfill any dream she desired (Stone 1). While Barbie may be a fun toy for girls to play with, it is
images such as Barbie and other seemingly perfect women in the media, Orenstein suggests,
that cause body distortion in young teenage girls (Orenstein 137). However, the eating disorder
help guide suggests differently. It reports that family members can play an important role in
the development of an eating disorder: “If talk in the house is continually focused around
eating and weight, it stands to reason that a young girl will begin to continually think about
eating and weight” (Causes). Another very controversial issue covered by Orenstein is the
subject of child beauty pageants. Orenstein views these competitions as extravagant and
appalling saying:
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It would be easy pickin’s for me to attack parents who tart up their daughter in hopes of
winning a few hundred bucks and a gilded plastic trophy; who train them to shake their
tail feathers on command, to blow kisses at the judges and coyly twirl their index fingers
into their dimpled cheeks (Orenstein 75).
Nonetheless, there are people who see the positive side of entering children in beauty
pageants. Child pageants teach girls how to work hard for success, to present themselves
gracefully, and become confident in themselves (Godbole). While all of this is very true, even
Medha Godbole, author of Pros and Cons of Beauty Pageants, acknowledges that every positive
side of pageants has a negative side as well. In addition to causing immense physical stress,
when a beauty pageant is not won the result could be a loss of self-esteem (Godbole). Despite
the opposing views of what causes difficulties and challenges in a girl’s life, it is unanimously
agreed upon that girls face many challenges when trying to fit into our materialistic world.
Section V:
I wholeheartedly agree with Peggy Orenstein when it comes to her opinion on the girliegirl culture. Girls are born into a world where the society and mass media has already defined
what they should aspire to be. The media doesn’t put much emphasis on young girl’s aspiring
to be competent, strong, creative, or smart, instead the focus is placed on being the “fairest of
them all.” Although girls are pressured to fit into stereotypes, I also agree that parents can play
an extremely important role in making sure small girls know the difference between fantasy
and reality. “Our role is not to keep the world at bay but to prepare our daughters so they can
thrive within it” (Orenstein 192). By making sure that girls know they are not defined by what is
on the outside and making sure they know they are beautiful regardless of what they wear or
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apply to their faces, parents and the rest of society can help raise a generation of strong,
capable girls.
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Section VI:
Works Cited
"Causes of Eating Disorders in Children Teens Teenage Girls." Eating Disorders - Information on Eating
Disorders in Teens. Web. 06 May 2011.
Godbole, Medha. "Beauty Pageants Pros and Cons." Buzzle Web Portal: Intelligent Life on the Web. Web.
06 May 2011.
Hellmich, Nanci. "Is Make-believe Vital to Kids? You Better Believe It - USATODAY.com." News, Travel,
Weather, Entertainment, Sports, Technology, U.S. & World - USATODAY.com. USA Today, 26
June 2008. Web. 06 May 2011.
Orenstein, Peggy. Cinderella Ate My Daughter: Dispatches from the Front Lines of the New
Girlie-girl Culture. New York, NY: HarperCollins, 2011. Print.
Orenstein, Peggy. "Peggy Orenstein | Bio." Peggy Orenstein | Award-Winning Writer, Editor & Speaker
Peggy Orenstein. Web. 05 May 2011.
Stone, Tanya Lee. The Good, the Bad, and the Barbie: a Doll's History and Her Impact on Us. New York:
Viking, 2010. Print.