On January 15, 2009 "With both engines out, a cool-headed pilot maneuvered his crowded jetliner over New York City and ditched it in the frigid Hudson River on Thursday, and all 155 on board were pulled to safety as the plane slowly sank. It was, the governor said, "a miracle on the Hudson,” MSNBC What made the pilot react the way he did… Knowledge Experience Eureka! "Chance favors the prepared mind.” Louis Pasteur Top 10 Eureka Moments 10. Post-its 9. Velcro Source- Science Channel 8. Microwave Oven 7. Coordinate Geometry 6. PCR 5. Television 4. Archimedes and the Golden Crown 3. Nerve Impulses Transmitted Chemically 2. Alternating Current 1. Special Relativity Robert Frost Wrote his favorite poem Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening in 1922 as he went out to view the sunrise after staying up all night writing another poem Frost said he wrote the new poem in just a few minutes and later stated that it was as if he’d had a hallucination. What’s Your Eureka Moment What have you learned during your break about yourself, someone else or even about life that made you say- “Eureka, I found it!” – Archimedes, Father of the Eureka What does Eureka have to do with Interpersonal Communication? Interpersonal communication is “the type or kind of communication that happens when the people involved talk and listen in ways that maximize the presence of the personal.” --John Stewart, Bridges Not Walls Fierce Conversations “One in which we come out from behind ourselves into the conversation and make it real.” --Susan Scott, Author and Life Coach Let yourself experience imagination… “We can’t ever forget that we also an audience of individuals. And without the kinds of movies nominated tonight, (at the 2007 Golden Globes), we would be in danger of losing that very thing that none of us can live without, we can’t work without it, we give it to each other everyday through the work we do and that is inspiration.” – Steven Spielberg, speech given at 2008 Golden Globes Go on the Web…Leave Something Valuable Behind L I have something to share… + = Inspiration Machine Assisted Interpersonal Communication Computer Mediated Communication Obama 2.0 "I want to be able to have voices, other than the people who are immediately working for me, be able to reach out and — and send me a message about what's happening in America." -- President Barack Obama, www.change.gov Web 1.0 vs. Web 2.0 •Read-only web vs. read/write web •Yahoo mail vs. Gmail •E-mail vs. IM •Newsletters vs. blogs •Static vs. dynamic •Isolated vs. interactive Robert Lackie, Rider University Librarian Traditional Mass Communication Characteristics Mass communication is only produced by complex and formal organizations Mass communication has multiple gatekeepers Mass communication needs a great deal of money to operate Mass communication organizations exist to make a profit and are highly competitive Adapted from: \The Dynamics of Mass Communication, Joseph Dominick COMM 560: Communication Issues for Leaders Chance to experience, share, engage, create and yes, inspire! Machine Assisted Interpersonal Communication Networking Mentoring Success Eureka! How… Build a Wiki What is the concept behind a wiki? “Wikiwiki is the Hawaiian word for fast and WikiwikiWeb is a quick Web Site.” -- Brenda Chawner and Paul H. Lewis, WikiWikiWebs: New Ways to Communicate in a Web Environment What should be our logo for this class? What does a logo represent? Be the CEO of Your Own Brand Your Self Presentation…negotiating our identities 1.You are creating identity whenever you communicate and everybody else is too 2.Creating identity affects who you are in relation to others 3.Your negotiation responses affect where your communication is on the impersonal-interpersonal continuum - Foundations of Interpersonal Communication, Stewart et al. What about your social brand? Do you change your Facebook profile when you feel good about yourself, similar to treating yourself to an indulgent – chocolate, Prada or iPhone? Who are you? In groups of two, take out two things that you have on you today that identifies who you- something about your personality and use that to introduce yourself to our class. “How we spend our days is how we spend our lives.” - Annie Dillard Write down how you feel about… Yourself Your Life Your Work Now Answer Four Questions Adapted from Fierce Conversations, Susan Scott Where am I going? Why am I going there? Who is going with me? How will I get there? As you digest those questions, here’s one more… 1. The far left side evaluate the peer’s content 2. The middle evaluate the peer’s emotion 3. The right side evaluate the peer’s intent. What problem in your life is holding you back from realizing your dream? Who wants to share one with us? Now, what did you hear? We need to look for the scaffolding on which a story rests…that’s where the authenticity lies… WE NEED TO LISTEN BEYOND WORDS OF INTENT SUSAN SCOTT, FIERCE CONVERSATIONS Six Important Features of All Kinds of Communication Meaning Perceptions Continuing the conversation Leaking our beliefs Choice Reveals ethical standards and commitments What does it mean to you if you voted for Obama vs. McCain? Six Important…(continued) Culture Affect how you receive messages Identities Collaboratively creating ourselves Changing, negotiating and evolving- Bride Wars Conversation Fierce conversations Ordinary is significant Six Important… Nexting What will I do next? What is my next move? What will this move mean for my relationship? What can I help to happen next? How does Leadership foster self? What is leadership? What does effective leadership look like? How can you test it? Let’s take a look… at this clip from today’s classroom http://www.successatthecore.com/teacher_develop ment_strategy.aspx?id=18 What are your thoughts about the characteristics of good leadership? How do you learn how to become a leader? Can leadership be learned? Interpersonal Effectiveness Organizational orientation theory Understanding the differences people have in performing their job Upward mobiles (give 110%) Indifferents (work to get a paycheck) Ambivalent (employee always looking for a better opportunity) Interpersonal Effectiveness Socialization Anticipatory Socialization Phase How you learn about the job Encounter Phase Training, mentoring, interpersonal communication opportunities (involvement) Metamorphosis Becoming an insider Comfort level increases Superior-Subordinate Relationships Taylor’s Theory Managers plan and direct, employees work Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Addresses interpersonal needs of workers Understanding that workers were concerned with more than physiological and safety needs Needs of Affiliation, Esteem & Self Actualization Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Self-Actualization Esteem Belongingness Safety Physiological Multi-directional Communication Classical Communication Downward from management to employees Formal, task-oriented Human Relations Upward & Downward Task and relational oriented, formal and informal Human Resources Multi-directional Task relational, informal and formal as needed Leader Member Exchange Theory (LMX) Leaders have relationships with all members These relationships are all unique existing on a continuum ranging from in-group to outgroup In-group relationships are where employees are trusted, supported and experience higher levels of satisfaction Out-group relationships the opposite Factors to Leading High Quality Relationships Similarity- perception of being alike Attraction- helps in accomplishing the goal Trust- allow subordinates to contribute to decision-making Practice the dual perspective Limit stereotypes Peer Relationships at Work Most influential relationships in the workplace are those that form among coworkers Relationship Development Proximity Communication Climate Task Dual Meanings Diversity People are working longer Converging Age Groups Managing criticism Technology Gender Communication Roles are changing Male/female brain Converging Generations Traditionalists Silent Generation Matures, - 1945 Baby Boomers “Me” Generation, 1945-1960 Baby Busters Gen-Xers 13th Generation 19601980 Echo Boomers Millennials Generation Y 1980present Theories of Leadership Leadership Style and Listening Styles Wall Street Journal Quiz Leadership Styles Transactional Transformational The Great Man Theory of Leadership (article negates this theory) Trait Theory of Personality Contingency Theory Situational Theory Behavioral Theory (reading supports) Participatory Theory “Ask Yourself…mercilessly: Do I exude trust? Do I smack of “trust”?” – Tom Peters Four Cores of Credibility Integrity Intent Capabilities Results Complete the trust test starting on page 50 of the Speed of Trust Self-trust is the first secret of success…the essence of heroism Ralph Waldo Emerson If we can commit to ourselves…if we can trust ourselves we can be more open to trust others. Do you trust yourself? Do you follow through on your self goals? How do you follow through? How do you make an intent a reality? “Humans are made human by that happening.” -- Martin Buber Martin Buber- Elements of the Interhuman Buber was a teacher and philosopher from Europe who carefully studied the human experience and relationships I and Thou, most famous work Buber was particularly interested in the continuum of I-it to I-thou from impersonal to interpersonal and the growth there in Martin Buber I and Thou We cannot fully realize who we are without the help of others This is how we become mature in our interpersonal relationships Buber and Experience “We are told that man experiences the world.” His intention is to say that we cannot passively experience Otherwise we just pile on, It, It and It We need to create meaning of our experience and develop relationships because of it Elements of the Interhuman Genuine Dialogue What is also known as “fierce conversations” Openness Imagining growth in another Confirmation does not mean approval Be Authentically yourself Listen to the silence Do you know anyone that would die with their mouths wide open? Commitment to the dialogue- present in the present Identity… On-line/Public Identities Continuum of anonymity to pseudonymity to real-life identity Self representing who you are on line Making conscious decisions about how he/she wants to be perceived by others. Identity…Under Construction What is your on-line self presentation? How do you develop your presence on line? Do you or your friends ever costume? Is your profile accurate? How do you use im, and texting in developing conversation? Can these conversations be fierce? Have you ever felt overwhelmed by criticism regarding a post you made on-line? Erving Goffman Face work How do elements of performance contribute to what and how people communicate? What roles do you play and how can you “identify” will others? How can you listen intently and give advice to a person who has retired from his job several years ago but wants to re-embark on that career again? How can you identify with his situation? “When you think of a fierce conversation, think passion, integrity, authenticity, collaboration. Think cultural transformation. Think leadership” --Susan Scott, Fierce Conversations Making your conversations Fierce – Susan Scott Principle 1: Master the courage to interrogate reality Principle 2: Come out from behind yourself into the conversation and make it real Principle 3: Be here, prepared to be nowhere else Principle 4: Tackle your toughest challenge today. Making your conversations Fierce Principle 5: Obey your instincts Principle 6: Take responsibility for your emotional wake Principle 7: Let silence do the heavy lifting Fierce Conversations Where can you improve your conversations? At work At home With friends With yourself What is your excuse for not trying today? Focus on one Principle a day for a week… Then see if you can answer these questions more favorably: What is real? What is honest? What is quality? What has value?