Tips for success

 Omit meaningless modifiers
 absolutely, awfully, definitely, fine, great, interesting, quite, really, very
 Replace wordy phrases
 at all times  always
 at that point in time  then
 at the present time  now, today
 due to the fact that  because
 for the purpose of  for
 in order to  to
 in spite of the fact that  although
 in the event that  if
 Can you eliminate 50 unnecessary words? Can you eliminate 100?

 Mistakes were made.
 We made mistakes.
 Miley Cyrus is influenced by Lady Gaga.
 Lady Gaga influences Miley Cyrus.
 The song was performed by Miley Cyrus.
 Miley Cyrus performed the song.
 It was decided that Miley Cyrus should never appear on
TV again.
 They decided that Miley should never appear on TV again.

Your grader said your writing could benefit from improved organization.
 Topic sentences
 Discuss the literature rather than the topic.
 Discuss trends and debates rather than specific people.
 Do topic sentences coordinate with your thesis?

Your grader said your writing was choppy.
 https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/574/02/
 Use transitional words and phrases for increased flow.

Your grader said your tone was unprofessional.
 Eliminate personal pronouns like “you” and “me” and
“my” and opinion phrases like “I think” or “I believe.”
 Avoid personal examples.
 Eliminate contractions.
 Refer to scholars by their last names.
 Avoid making arguments about the topic.

Your grader said you were under the word count.
 Find another article to discuss.
 Include another sub-point in your thesis.
 Discuss methodologies.
 Discuss rhetorical strategies.
 Introduce your scholars!

Your grader said you’ve written a research paper and not a literature review.
 Are you spending too much time on one article?
 Summarize briefly and then move on to comparisons with other articles. Remember, the majority of your paragraph should focus on relationships.
 Summarize on your way to making a point:
 The article, which asserts that spanking negatively affects a child’s ability to make friends in junior high, provided a case study that many subsequent articles have cited.
 The study, which interviewed over fifty couples about their feelings toward spanking, found that women are often the instigators of spanking. These results directly contradict the work of Scholar A, whose own study of two thousand couples found that men are the likely instigators of spanking.

Your grader said your writing was filled with typos.
 Have a friend or roommate read it aloud to you. Take notes. When your friend stumbles on a word or phrase, rewrite it for clarity.
 Read your paper sentence by sentence, starting with the last sentence.
 Use spell check.
 Visit the Writing Center.

 How does this revision better suit your audience?
 Audience – professional, academic, scholarly
 If you made your writing more professional
 If you eliminated typos and grammatical errors
 If you eliminated wordiness
 How have you refined the purpose of your paragraph/paper?
 Purpose – to synthesize, to compare/contrast, to discuss relationships, to explain trends, to detail debates or methodologies or rhetorical strategies
 If you introduced your scholars
 If you eliminated summary in favor of synthesis
 If you added another example
 How did you more adequately convey what you mean?
 Meaning – to clarify, to simplify, to avoid distracting language, to streamline
 If you improved the organization by adding topic sentences
 If you improved the flow with transitional phrases
 If you eliminated wordiness
 If you eliminated typos and grammatical errors

 Include your thesis,
 Your original paragraph,
 Your revised paragraph,
 And a paragraph discussing the changes you made, in which you mention audience, purpose, and meaning.

 1.2 Due October 18 th
 Pages 191-2 in your textbook for help with introductions and conclusions
 Make an appointment now with the Writing Center.