The Four Loves
Dathan & Carsten Hamann
The Importance of Love
 1 John 4:8 Whoever
does not love does not
know God, because God
is love.
 1 Peter 4:8 Above all,
love each other deeply,
because love covers
over a multitude of sins.
 Mark 12:31 The second
is this: 'Love your
neighbor as yourself.’
There is no
commandment
greater than these.
Introduction & First
Distinctions
 Gift-Love
 Working Father
 God the Father for
Christ the Son
 How close can we
come to Gift-Love for
God?
 Need-Love
 Child running to a
parent’s arms
 Adults turning to others
for company
 Our love for Christ
 Matthew 11:28 "Come
to Me, all who are
weary and heavy-laden,
and I will give you rest.”
Implications of Our Need-Love
with Christ
 The healthiest, highest
and most realistic
relationship with Christ
 Happiness, strength
 Longing, needing
 Jeremiah 31:25 "For I satisfy
the weary ones and refresh
everyone who languishes."
 Likeness/Nearness with
God?
Likings And Loves For the
Sub-human
 I Love Strawberries!
 Two contrasting
types of pleasure:
 Need-pleasures
 water
 Pleasures of
appreciation.
 wine
 ”Love begins to be a
demon the moment
he begins to be a
god”
 Lucifer and his pride
The Four Loves
Storge
Philia
Eros
Agape
Storge
Storge
 Affection
 Family- Mother/Child
 Most similar to love
found in animals
 Least discriminating of
all loves
 Old or “vieux”
 Humblest of all loves
 Baby talk and kisses
 Brings out the good the
gardener
στοργή
 Strorge blends with
other loves
 Affection does not make
the happy home
 Need-love of Gift-love
 “If you want to be loved
be lovable” -Ovid Storge cannot be taken
for granted
 Jealousy of affection
 Mrs. Fidget
 Pets
 Don’t let love become a
demon
Philia
Philia
 Modern Conceptions
of Friendship
 Ancient Conceptions
of Friendship
 “Un-natural” quality
 “Fall of Philia”
 Proverbs 17:17 A
friend loves at all
times, and a brother
is born for adversity.
 John 15:13 Greater
love has no one
than this, that he lay
down his life for his
friends.
Qualities of Philia
 Otherworldly,
“Unnatural” quality
 Friend’s “stance”
 Least jealous
 Seeking a common
truth
 Sharing a common
vision
Relationship Distinctions
 Friendship vs. Companionship
 Friendship vs. Allegiance
 Friendship vs. Sexual Love
 Homosexuality
Lover’s Question
 Which is more powerful, Eros or Philia?
 “Either you two will cease to be lovers but
remain forever joint seekers of the same
God, the same beauty, the same truth, or
else losing all that, you will retain as long as
you live the raptures and ardors, all the
wonder and the wild desire of Eros.”
“Unnecessary”
 Unnecessary Quality
 “the exquisite arbitrariness and
irresponsibility of [friendship]”
 Egyptian/Babylonian vs. Greek
Philosophers and Mathematicians
 “It has no survival value, rather it is one of
those things which gives value to survival.”
Between the Sexes?
 Apparent discouragement of malefemale friendships
 Friendship is born of certain
circumstances and similarities
 Descriptions of Educated men and
uneducated wives, and vice versa
 Societal/Educational boundaries
Eros
Eros vs. Venus
 Eros
 “the kind of love which
lovers are”
 Relationships
originating from
Eros
 Which is better?
 Want of the woman
 The most
appreciative of all
pleasures
 Venus
 “carnal or animally
sexual element
within Eros”
 Relationships
originating from
Venus
 Want of a woman
 Need-pleasure
έρως
 Obliterates the
distinction between
giving and receiving
 Importance of Venus
within Eros
 Brother Ass
 “A divine joke”
 A lover’s pinch and
masquerade
 Putting on Nakedness
 Happiness is not the
aim of Eros
 Dangers
 Song of Solomon 4:10 How
delightful is your love, my
sister, my bride! How much
more pleasing is your love
than wine, and the fragrance
of your perfume than any
spice!
 Ephesians 5:33 However,
each one of you also must
love his wife as he loves
himself, and the wife must
respect her husband.
 Song of Solomon 1:2 Let him
kiss me with the kisses of his
mouth— for your love is
more delightful than wine.
 Song of Solomon 8:6 Place
me like a seal over your
heart, like a seal on your
arm; for love is as strong as
death, its jealousy unyielding
as the grave. It burns like
blazing fire, like a mighty
flame.
Agape
Agape
 “Love is enough?”
 Not a diminishment of other loves
 Garden
Competition of Loves
 Natural loves vs. love of God
 Unworthy of Replacement
 God and Half-gods
 Romantic stance is to be wary of loving
people too little
 Traditional theological stance is to be
wary of loving people in excess
 Augustinian view
Qualities of Agape
 “To love at all is to be vulnerable”
 “If you want to make sure of keeping
[your heart] intact, you must give your
heart to no one…lock it up safe in the
casket or coffin of your selfishness.”
“Inordinate Love”
 Relationship and balance
 “It is probably impossible to love any
human being simply “too much.” We
may love him too much in proportion to
our love for God.
Loyalties?
 It is not ultimately a question of
whether or not you love God “more”
than others, but what power claims
your will
 True and fulfilling natural loves yield to
the standard of Agape
Nature of God
 God is love… 1 John 4:16
 How do we describe this kind of love?
 Analogy of light
 Gift-love vs. Need-love
 Object of love intrinsic lovable qualities
Responses
 Temptation to feel Intrinsically lovable
 Analogy of mirrors
 “Divine love does not substitute itself for the
natural…the natural loves are summoned to
become modes of Charity while also
remaining the natural loves they were.”
 Transformation not replacement
 Redemption not substitute
Conclusion
 Application?
 Christ-centric…