Sofie Dewayani 2014
sofhani@gmail.com
Outlining
Annotating
Asking questions
Reading
Critical
C
thinking
Avoid generalization
Contextualizing
Writing
Critical synthesis
 Weak foundations of academic literacy in basic
education.
 Limited access to relevant literatures
 Cultural difference in rhetorical conventions
when writing in non-native language
 Rhetorical conventions of written academic
English differ greatly and (often) are
influenced by the most productive
community/country/culture.
 (Unfortunately) Some rhetorical rules are
unwritten ;-)
 The conventions include the “logics” in
how the author builds his/her own
intellectual argument and present it in a
way that is clear and effective to avoid
ambiguity and misunderstanding.
 Readers are not to struggle with
words to decipher meaning
 Writers are to frame every section
and paragraph:
 Define all terms
 Introduce the main topic
 Contextualize all statements
 Integrated and progressing flow of
thoughts represents a clear way of
thinking
 The order of information follows
sequential patterns; it can be
deductive or inductive.
How does it feel to be poor in a society
otherwise dominated by affluence? What kind of
participation and what kind of choices are available to
poor consumers? And more generally, what are the social
consequences of the increased emphasis on consumption
and consumerism for social marginalization and the
distribution of social welfare? These are the main
research questions of the present paper, which builds on
empirical results from a primarily qualitative comparative
research project on social vulnerability and consumption
in X and Y. The overall aim is to gain a better
understanding of social marginalization by analyzing the
relationship between consumption and social exclusion in
X welfare societies, where both the market and individual
conduct are really highly influenced by political
regulation. The project, in other words, attempt to
integrate the fields of consumption, welfare and poverty.
The background is a series of debates on how to measure
social exclusion in contemporary welfare society,
especially debates on defining “poverty” in a society that
is rhetorically and ideologically dominated by “affluence”
(References).
How does it feel to be poor in a society
otherwise dominated by affluence? What kind of
participation and what kind of choices are available to
poor consumers? And more generally, what are the
social consequences of the increased emphasis on
consumption and consumerism for social
marginalization and the distribution of social welfare?
These are the main research questions of the present
paper, which builds on empirical results from a
primarily qualitative comparative research project on
social vulnerability and consumption in X and Y.
The overall aim of this paper is to gain a
better understanding of social marginalization by
analyzing the relationship between consumption and
social exclusion in X welfare societies, where both the
market and individual conduct are really highly
influenced by political regulation. _______________
The project integrates the fields of
consumption, welfare and poverty. The background is a
series of debates on how to measure social exclusion in
contemporary welfare society, especially debates on
defining “poverty” in a society that is rhetorically and
ideologically dominated by “affluence” (References).
In what follows, I first define the agonistic
approach. Second, I define the resistance I met
during fieldwork in the Hinterland, drawing on
Adler and Adler (2002), and Bourdieu (1999), and
discuss the limitation of these perspectives. Third, I
develop the agonistic approach by reflexivity
embedding the interview situation into the
ethnographic context and showing how this
context conditions and limits positions for research
participants, thereby setting the stage for potential
agonisms between the researcher and field
participants. Moreover, I point to ways of possibly
constructing alternative positions for research
participants. Fourth, I discuss the way in which the
agonistic approach taps into approaches to
qualitative interview (references). Finally, I sum up
how the agonistic approach challenges qualitative
research by offering a new lens for insight into the
ways in which research relationships are parts of,
and are formed by, everyday social processes and
power relations.
“One problem is organizational; it is hard to see
the structure or follow the argument, especially
in the introduction (p. 1-4). Important
information about the macro context and
history of Indonesian policies/practices is
scattered (some on p.2, then again p.4-7) and
should be consolidated in the section called
“The Idealized Childhood....” which, I suggest
re-naming, “Government Policies: Idealizing
and “Protecting Children.” The ending of the
paper also needs some work so that the reader
can see how the findings relate back to the
questions in the introduction. What are the
main findings and what is their significance?”
If you are not a native speaker, please have
your paper read carefully by one. This is
crucial for the quality of both your work and
our journal. Furthermore, even seemingly
simple cases of incorrect usage (for example,
wrong prepositions) can lead to serious
misunderstandings and a general lack of
clarity about your paper’s main points. Either
UK or US English is fine, but please be
consistent!
 Be as concise as possible without sacrificing
meaning.
 Keep your sentences reasonably short.
 Keep your paragraphs reasonably short.
 Write in the active voice.
 Avoid unnecessary jargons.
 Frame and contextualize everything.
 Never let your reader to become confused, not
even for one sentence.
 Anticipate your reader’s questions, and answer
them before the reader can even ask them.
 Anticipate objections and counter-arguments;
frame and discuss them before the “opposition”
can.
 Define all your terms the moment you first
mention them.

















As a means of = by (doing), to (do)
At the present time = now
At this point in time = now
By means of = by, with
Close proximity = near
Due to the fact that = because, as
For a period of = for
For the purpose of = for
In accordance with = by, following,
under
In an effort to = to
In a timely manner = on time,
properly
In conjunction with = with
In order that = for, so
In order to (do) = to (do)
In regard to = about
In spite of = despite
In the near future == soon [be more
specific if possible]
 The fact that the data is limited creates to problems
 That the data is limited creates two problems.
 To a large extent the government has exaggerated the
problem.
 The government has largely exaggerated the problem.
 Overall, the government has exaggerated the problem.
Replace “above” with “previously” or “earlier”
As previously mentioned, ….
…, as discussed earlier,…
Or “this”: This statement clearly reflects the conflicting
viewpoints.
Replace “below” with “following”/”as follows”/”the
following”
 Following are the conditions under which the theory
holds.
 We organize the data as follows:
 The following results indicate the weaknesses in the
government policy.





To take into account = to consider
To set up = to determine
To delve into = to analyze
To hang out = to interact
To be made bigger = to be
expanded
 If you can use verbs, why use nouns?
We made an assessment of the problems from three angles.
We assessed the problem from three angles.
They have little knowledge about the complexities of the issues.
They know little about the complexities of the issues.
 Eliminate there is, there are, and it is
There are 300 people in this study
This study involves 300 people, or, the study comprises 300 people.
It is not immediately clear what the results suggest.
What the results suggest is not immediately clear.
It is difficult to understand and explain what happened in the 1990s without
taking into account the developments of the 1980s.
Understanding and explaining what happened in the 1990s is difficult
without considering the developments of the 1980s.
 Avoid hedge words
 I would like to suggest…
 In this case it seems that the assessors do not consider …
 A theater is a building that has been specifically
designed for dramatic performances.
 A theater is a building specifically designed for
dramatic performances.
 A collagen is a white, inelastic protein that is
formed and maintained by fibroblasts.
 A collagen is a white, inelastic protein formed
and maintained by fibroblasts.
 A parliament is a national governing body which
has the highest level of legislative power within a
state.
 A parliament is a national governing body with
the highest level of legislative power within a
state.
 A moon is a natural satellite which orbits a
planet.
 A moon is a natural satellite orbiting a planet.
 It was found that the vocationally trained in
Germany and Denmark fare better than the
unskilled on each of three attainment measure.
 This study found that …
 The findings show that …
 Few-country specific variables are included in
the analysis.
 The analysis include few country-specific
variables.
 The findings are presented in Table 3.
 The findings appear I Table 3.
 American presidents are elected every four
years.
 American elect a president every four years.
 American presidential elections take place
every four years.
 Coal is mined in West Virginia and
Pennsylvania.
Note: “To be” makes a weak passive voice. The
alternatives are “Form” and “constitute.”
 The analysis did not yield any new
results.
 The analysis yielded no new
results.
 The government did not allocate
much funding for the program.
 The government allocated little
funding for the program.
There are several studies in Epidemiology that
have shown that when people consume alcohol in
moderate amounts they have lower risk of
developing heart disease in comparison to those
who drink a lot of alcohol.
Introduction
Methods
Results
Discussion
 Introduction : provide the rationale
for the paper, moving from the
general discussion of the topic to
the particular questions, issues, or
hypothesis being investigated. A
secondary purpose is to attract
interest in the topic.
 Methods section describes, in
various degrees of detail,
methodology, materials (or
subjects) and procedures. This is
the narrowest part of a paper.
 In Results section, the findings are
described, accompanied by
variable amounts of commentary.
 Discussion section gives meaning
to and interprets the results in
variety of ways while referring to
statements made in the
introduction.
 Establishing a research territory
 Showing that general research area is important,
central, interesting, or problematic.
 Introducing and reviewing items of previous
research in the area.
 Establishing a niche
 Indicating a gap in the previous research by
extending previous knowledge in some way.
 Occupying the niche
 By outlining purpose or stating the nature of the
present research
 By listing research questions or hypothesis
 By announcing principal findings
 By stating the value of the present research
 By indicating the structure of the paper




Write something you have a passion with.
Establish a realistic goal.
Read critically, summarize, and paraphrase.
Make writing a social activity.
Belcher, W. L. (xxxx). Writing your journal
article in 12 weeks: A guide to academic
publishing success.
Reid, N. (2010). Getting published in
international journals: Writing strategies
for European Social Scientist.