Goals of the Workshop: A Review
to understand the
what, why and how
of the Six Traits of Writing
Model
Causes of Rater Bias
The positive-negative leniency error: scoring to
high or low for everyone as a matter of principle
The trait error: giving too much weight to one
trait while ignoring the others
Appearance: messy, tiny, or poor handwriting
can be annoying, but it is not related to the
traits
(other than + 1
presentation)
Length: Is longer better? Not necessarily.
Fatigue: Take a break. It makes a bigger
difference than you think
Personality clash: Love baseball? Hate
animal stories? Sick of conspiracy
theories? Your personal interest is
separate from scoring.
Repetitive factor: If each paper sounds the
same (“On my spring break I…”) each still
gets a fresh score. A more open prompt
limits this problem.
Skimming: to score fairly read the whole
paper carefully. The first few lines don’t
indicate quality overall.
Self-scoring: Make sure you score what is
there, not the blanks you fill in and
corrections you make.
Sympathy score: Difficult or tragic topics
may touch our hearts in ways that make
scoring hard. Separate response to student
experience from scoring traits in the writing.
Vulgar language: Profanity or graphic
violence might illicit a strong reaction.
Consider what your policy is in response.
Also note if the language contributes
effectively to the writing or is simply there to
shock.
Rules for using the Rubric with
Level 3 Writing
• Look for what is present in the writing, not for
what is missing (no deficit models!)
• ALL indicators under a score point must be
present & justifiable in order to award that score
point
• Split scores (a 2/3, e.g.) are ok
• ALWAYS refer to the rubric, not personal opinion
• Good writing is good writing. Don’t try to ‘adjust’
for grade level or “ability levels.”
STRATEGIES FOR TEACHING
THE SIX TRAITS TO
STUDENTS
STRATEGY ONE
• Brainstorm qualities of good writing
• Read, read and read some more!
• Validate students’ opinions by giving them
the Student-Friendly Guide & keep
language of traits posted in room
• Base grades on growth in traits
Teach students the language they
need to speak and think like writers
Activity:
Ask students to create a free-verse
“poem” by brainstorming the
qualities of a trait using the
following stem as a starting point:
The important thing about
_(insert a trait)__ is…
Example:
The important thing about Presentation is that
It looks GOOD.
You can’t decide whether to read it first
Or set it aside for a treat later…
The margins, fonts, illustrations and charts
All make the message clear.
When you hold it up, others go “ooh, aaah.”
Your handwriting would make your grandmother
proud.
But the most important thing about Presentation is
that
It looks GOOD.
STRATEGY TWO
• Read, score and discuss
anonymous student papers
• Use examples from opposite
ends of the spectrum
• Use samples for many genres
STRATEGY THREE
• Rehearse the process of revision in small
groups. This is especially helpful for a
group effort in moving a piece from Level 1
to a Level 2 or 3.
My Teacher Had a Rip in His Pants
Just about a week ago my teacher
had a rip in his pants. It was really
funny. I didn’t see it riht away but
someone told me then I saw it and
wanted to laugh but I held it in.
Then someone told him and
everyone started to laugh. Then
he went home to change. The
End.
STRATEGY FOUR
• READ– Literature you love, yes,
but also:
• Think beyond books:
• Discuss which trait(s) are
emphasized in real-world writing,
such as:
–A computer
-Junk mail
manual
-A map
–Recipe
-Business letter
–Menu
-Travel brochure
–Catalogue
- A blog
–A Presentation (think Springboard)
STRATEGY FIVE
• Focused Revision Lessons
– Create a SHORT paragraph that is WEAK in
the trait you want to emphasize in a lesson
– Read your piece aloud on overhead. Have
students score it
– Ask students to help you make a Plan for
Revision—a very specific suggestions for
making it stronger in the focus trait
– Save their suggestions on overhead
– Revise, but don’t make it perfect! Talk it
through!
My Trip to Disneyland
Well, one time we went to Disneyland and it was
pretty fun. And there were a lot of people there
who wanted to ride on the same rides as we did
so we had to wait in line for a long time and that
part wasn’t so great, but except for that,
Disneyland was really cool. My favorite ride was
Pirates of the Caribbean, but I liked the food
there, too. They’ve got lots of different kinds of
food to eat there like chili cheese fries and
popcorn. My son, Sam, really liked the
hamburgers there because they were barbecued
and had a lot of good stuff on them, but I liked the
chili cheese fries the best.
Sometimes we make them at home now
because they were so good at Disneyland.
Anyway, Sam and I had a great time at
Disneyland. Sam didn’t like the ride “It’s a
Small World,” because he said it was
really boring. But I liked it because it
showed all the different countries and how
they dressed. There were a lot of people
at Disneyland from different countries too.
When they came in they looked so
surprised to see all the people and rides
and food everywhere
STRATEGY SIX
Designing Effective Writing Assignments
RAFTS!
• Role of the writer – helps the writer decide on
point of view and voice.
• Audience for the piece of writing – reminds the
writer that he must communicate ideas to
someone else; helps writer determine content
and style.
• Format of the material – helps the writer organize
ideas and employ the conventions of format, such
as letters, interviews, and story problems.
• Topic or subject of the piece of writing – helps the
writer focus on main ideas.
• Strong verb – directs the writer to the writing
purpose, e.g., persuade, analyze, create, predict,
compare, defend, evaluate.
Example:
You are Ulysses on your journey
home from Troy after being gone
for over 10 years. Write a letter to
your wife Penelope explaining
why you won’t make it home for
dinner, AGAIN.
•
•
•
•
Role: You are Ulysses
Audience: your wife Penelope
Format: Write a letter
Topic: Why you won’t make it
home
• Strong Verb: “Explaining”
Examine the following actual
prompt from ISTEP/ECA. Can
you identify the RAFTS
elements? How might RAFTS
help students make sense of
their writing assignments? ( the
first slide is background, the second is the
prompt)
• Starting next year, your school may
require all students to complete a certain
number of hours of community service in
order to graduate. The service must be off
campus and must be approved by a
school counselor on the basis of its value
to the community and to the student.
• What sort of community service would
you choose if this new requirement went
into effect? Possibilities include
volunteering at a hospital, cleaning up or
helping maintain parks, and helping
younger students with their homework at
a library or community center.
Write an essay to explain your choice
to your school counselor. Describe
exactly what sort of service you
propose to do. Explain why it would
be of value to the community and why
it would provide a worthwhile
educational experience for you.
Try reversing the process. Write a
prompt in traditional form using
these elements:
• Role: The digit “1”
• Audience: The digit “0”
• Format: Argument
• Topic: Who is used more?
• Strong Verb: convince
STRATEGY SEVEN
FOCUS LESSONS on
EACH TRAIT
IDEAS & CONTENT
A Warmup
On board, post:
“Five Good Uses for a Pocket”
Have students make a list of the five best uses
they can think of. Share. Ask them to think
about which ideas appealed to them most…and
why. Contrast ideas with imagination to those
with little thought.
Show, Don’t Tell
A great way to have students move away from trite
ideas in writing is to present them with a few
clichés, like:
“You can’t judge a book by its cover” or
“Turnabout is fair play” or “Turn over a new leaf”
Then, have them write briefly on one,
demonstrating the cliché without stating it
outright. Read them aloud, letting rest of class
figure out which cliché has been revealed. Ask
why it’s better not to say the cliché outright, even
if its true.
ORGANIZATION
• Zoom!
• Post scenarios, like:
• A biography of a famous person
• A classified ad for a used car
• The header for a restaurant ad
Ask students to practice creating
introductions that will leave readers
begging for more. Share. Ask: Which is
best? What helps craft a good intro?
VOICE
• Compare two versions of a topic, one from
an encyclopedia and one from a children’s
book. Animals are good here. Compare
the writers’ voices.
• Voice can be examined in depth by having
students write to different audiences. Have
them write letters to different audiences on
their recent grade card– address one to a
parent, one to a friend, one to a teacher or
principal. Discuss the “code switching”
they did in their writing.
For instance: (from Wikipedia)
The Gray Wolf (Canis lupus; also spelled Grey
Wolf, see spelling differences; also known as
Timber Wolf or Wolf) is a mammal in the order
Carnivora. The Gray Wolf shares a common
ancestry with the domestic dog (Canis lupus
familiaris), as evidenced by DNA sequencing and
genetic drift studies. Gray wolves were once
abundant and distributed over much of North
America, Eurasia, and the Middle East. Today, for
a variety of human-related reasons, including
widespread habitat destruction and excessive
hunting, wolves inhabit only a very limited portion
of their former range.
versus:
from “Wolves” (in Zoobooks 2)
Wolves are the lions of the Northern Hemisphere.
Found in North America, Europe and Asia, the
lives of wolves are very similar to the lives of lions
in Africa. Like lions, wolves live in groups, they
are meat-eating animals that work together to
catch prey, and they are beautiful animals. In fact,
some of them even have thick ruffs of hair that
look like the manes of lions. When you consider
all these similarities, it seems strange that many
people admire lions, but dislike wolves. Lions are
called “magnificent” and “lordly.” But wolves are
often called “sneaky” and “cowardly.”
WORD CHOICE
• Try this CLOZE activity:
What words are missing from the
following passage from Annie
Dillard’s essay “In the Jungle” in
her book Teaching a Stone to
Talk: Expeditions and
Encounters?
The lake was wonderful. Herons, egrets and
ibises _____the sawgrass shores,
kingfishers and cuckoos _____ from sunlight
to shade, great turkeylike birds ____ in dead
branches, and hawks ____ overhead. There
was all the time in the world.
I saw the shoreline water ___ and the
sawgrass ___above a thrashing paichi, an
enormous black fish in these parts…Piranha
fish live in the lakes, and electric eels. I ____
my fingers in the water, figuring it would be
worth it…
The lake was wonderful. Herons, egrets
and ibises plodded the sawgrass shores,
kingfishers and cuckoos clattered from
sunlight to shade, great turkeylike birds
fussed in dead branches, and hawks lolled
overhead. There was all the time in the
world. I saw the shoreline water roil and the
sawgrass heave above a thrashing paichi,
an enormous black fish in these
parts…Piranha fish live in the lakes, and
electric eels. I dangled my fingers in the
water, figuring it would be worth it…
Try this: Post these words:
•TAUNT
•ATTEST
•WAIL
ask students to write what they
think they might mean.
Give them these sentences:
• “Your
dress is the ugliest one at
the dance,” taunted Allison.
• “There’s the killer!” the witness
attested as she pointed to the
defendant.
• “Give me back my toy!” the twoyear-old wailed.
•Ask them to
revise their
definitions and
ask what all
three have in
common
(they’re synonyms
for “said”)
•Now, ask them to
brainstorm as many
words as they know
that could serve as
synonyms for “said.”
•Chart them, then
ask: Why not just
use “said”?
Some synonyms for SAID
Mentioned
Muttered
Exclaimed
Whispered
Insisted
Answered
Went on
Shrieked
Explained
Shouted
Spoke
Persisted
Boasted
Inferred
Implied
Related
Uttered
Snapped
Mimicked
Divulged
Fumed
Acquiesced
Alleged
Propounded
SENTENCE FLUENCY
• Try this: Use SAS (Sentence Analysis
Sheet) on passages—either professional
or student
Sentence Analysis Sheet
Sent 1st 4
words
#
1
2
3
4
5
Verbs # of
words
I have a dog. I have a brother and sister too.
We live in a big house. We used to live in
California where my mom used to work at
a hospital that had a funny name I can’t
remember and we lived by the beach
where we used to go swimming when it
was warm enough we used to wade in the
big waves and look for little critters like to
scurry around and burrow down in the
sand qucikly for you get a good look at
them.
Try it by analyzing these sentences from Eve Bunting’s “Secret Place”
• In the heart of the city where I live there is a
secret place.
• Close by is a freeway where cars and trucks
boom, and a railroad track with freight trains that
shunt and grunt.
• There are warehouses with windows blinded by
dust and names paint-scrawled on their brick
walls
• The lines on the telephone and electric poles
web the sky.
• Smokestacks blow clouds to dim the sun.
CONVENTIONS
• Try this: Give students a paragraph that
has serious problems with conventions.
The length of the piece and complexity of
convention issues can be modified.
dear john I want a man who knows what
love is all about you are generous kind thoughtful
people who are not like you admit to being useless
and inferior you have ruined me for other men I
yearn for you I have no feelings whatsoever when
we’re apart I can be happy forever will you let me
be yours gloria
Have students edit the piece for conventions
using a step-by-step list like this:
1. spelling
2. punctuation
3. capitalization
4. grammar and usage
5. paragraphing (if appropriate)
Discuss the advantages of breaking a
complicated task down into doable
chunks.
Goals for Writing Teachers
• To celebrate students’ love of writing
• To see not what is MISSING, but what is
THERE
• To teach ourselves to identify moments of
voice, details, expressiveness, exploration
with conventions
• To help students recognize and build on
their strengths
• To respond to content first
• To respond to the writer, not the writing
• To control the anxiety that urges us toward
too much perfection too soon
• To see exploration as an achievement
• To help students see that writing is
thinking, and conventions exist to serve
ideas
• To give students the language they need
to think like writers
• To share with expression, passion, voice
and heart the books WE love
• To write…and to share with students the
adventures of our writing
• To nurture within ourselves a bedrock
belief in the power of children to do
amazing things