Styles and Tactics
Conflict Styles: are patterned responses, or clusters
of behavior, that people use in conflict.
Tactics: are individual moves people make to carry
out their general approach.
Styles describe the big picture, whereas tactics
describe the specific communication moves of the big
picture.
Tactics
Tactics sound planned, but often are not.
When you use a tactic numerous times, it
becomes a style ( a patterned response).
Avoidance Tactics
Denial and equivocation: Denial, or evasive
remarks
strategic ambiguity “Let’s talk about it sometime,”or “I’ll be home late.”
“What
about
my
ex?
What
about
Topic management: Topic
shifts,
or
topic
avoidance.
“Let’s
not
talk
about
my
past
relationship.
yours?”
Noncommittal remarks: Statements that neither
affirm or deny the presence
of
conflict.
“I’m not sure if I’m upset about that.”
Irreverent
remarks:
joking Who are you Dr.
“Why
do you always
want to talkFriendly
about our relationship?
Phil?!”
Personal Criticism: Criticizing personal
Destructive Competition Tactics
characteristics, or behaviors.
“You’re so messy, irresponsible,
Statementsetc.”
that reject the
Rejection:
perspective.
partner’s
“I feel so strongly that I don’t care what you think.”
Hostile Imperatives, jokes, questions : Demands,
threats, teasing sarcasm, leading questions. “I
forgot, you’re always right!”
Presumptive remarks: Assumptions about your
“You’re so predictable, I knew you’d hate it.”
partners thoughts and feelings.
Accommodation Tactics
Giving up/giving in: “Have it your way.”
Disengagement: “I don’t really care that much.”
Denial of needs: “It’s OK. I can stay late and work.”
Expression of desire for harmony: “It’s forgotten,
don’t worry about it.”
Compromise
Appeal to Fairness:
“You got Tactics
what you wanted last
time.”
Suggest a Trade-off: “I’ll scratch your back, if you
scratch mine.” Quid pro quo
Maximize wins/minimize losses: “I’ll give up the
idea of going to my folks house for Christmas, if we
go to Hawaii together.
Offer a quick, short term solution: Let’s do it my
way first, and and see if you like how it works.
Collaboration Tactics
What are Collaboration Tactics?
Give an example of each. (from your personal
experience, preferably).
Write a dialogue (which can be from your own
experiences, or fictional) with six exchanges that
use tactics from your assigned style. After you
finish, improve it by writing a dialogue that uses
collaboration tactics.
In the following movie clip, which tactics are being
used? Is there enough repetition that reveals a
conflict style?