You Have a Point:
Writing a Strong Thesis
Statement
Developed by Kayleen Doornbos for the Bellevue College Writing Lab
For Today
• A thesis statement: what it is & is
not, and what it does
• Origin story: where thesis
statements come from
• Proving ground: draft and test
some thesis statements
A thesis is just an idea
A thesis is “the controlling idea,
the main point,” in other words,
“the conclusion you have drawn
about the evidence you have
accumulated” (Fowler, Aaron, and
Okoomian 30).
A thesis statement expresses the idea
• Names the topic clearly
• Asserts something specific and significant
in the form of a statement, not a question
• Conveys your reason for writing
• Usually shows the order of ideas in the
essay
A Thesis Comes From a Process
1.
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8.
Gather information
Make decisions about it
Examine your reasons for your decisions
Try out a draft
Test it
Revise the sentence
Test the revision
Repeat steps 6 & 7 as necessary
1. Gather information
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assignment prompt
lived experiences
fiction
essays
journal articles
books
television, films, even advertising
Why are you writing? What is your purpose?
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Analysis?
Argument?
Exposition (explaining)?
Comparison/Contrasting?
Cause-and-Effect?
Persuasion?
The purpose of the essay is going to directly
affect the content and form of the thesis
statement.
Argument = stating your case
The argumentative essay is the most
common type:
Make decisions—draw a conclusion—
about the information you have
gathered, and state the reasons why
you have arrived at your conclusion.
Example of drawing a conclusion
for an argument thesis
• Students are under a lot of stress from
classes, homework, job, & family.
• They often have to commute great
distances to attend BC.
• Their classes can be several hours apart in
one day.
• Studies have shown that a short nap
can maintain and improve performance
(Milner and Cote, 2009, et al.)
• Stress and sleep debt can lead to deadly
metabolic diseases, depression, and
heart disease.
Conclusion: Bellevue College should invest
in secure sleep pods for commuter
students because doing so would support
student success and reduce the risk of
deadly illnesses.
Assert/Claim/Argument
An assertion is a statement that has to be
supported by evidence.
It’s also known as an argument,
or as a claim and its rationale
= a what and a why
A thesis statement makes an assertion or
an argument.
The “what” and the “why”
The what: Bellevue College should invest
in secure sleep pods for long-distance
commuter students
The why: to help support student success
and reduce the risk of deadly illnesses.
A strong argument topic
• Concerns a conclusion drawn from
evidence
• Can be debated—reasonable
people have different views of it.
• Is debated—people, in fact, do
take sides and argue over it.
A strong argument topic
• Is something you care about
and know about or want to do
research on.
• Is narrow enough to argue in the
space and time available. (Fowler et al.
163)
Argument = a debatable point
An opinion is a judgment based on
evidence.
It’s an interpretation of information.
Different people have different
interpretations.
When reasonable people differ on
opinions, they often debate about them.
Argument = a debatable point
• A fact is not a good basis: no one can
sensibly argue against it.
• Personal likes or beliefs also—you like
or believe something, end of story, no
debate.
• If no one in their right mind would
disagree about it, like getting a poke in
the eye, it’s not a good argument topic.
Did not! Did too!
—Counterarguments and Rebuttals
• Consider opposing views and
address them in your intro, thesis
statement, and essay.
• After discussing counterarguments,
show why the opposing view(s)
is/are mistaken in your rebuttal.
Evidence/Support/Rationale/Reasons
“ . . . and it was a really good movie.”
“What was good about it?”
“I dunno, I just really liked it.”
“What did you like about it?”
“Um, well, there was a really cute guy in it, and he was forced to fight
in a war—I don’t remember which one, but it was a really long time
ago—and he was taken prisoner. Eventually he gets home, and finds
out his wife was told he was dead and married another guy, and just,
well, it was really powerful for me because I actually know someone
that something like that happened to.”
“In other words, it was a powerful story of a soldier who loses his true
love to war, and though it is a story seen many times throughout
history, and thus trite or cliché, it remains believable because it
continues to happen in real life.”
“Wait, have you seen it already?”
Pre-emptively answer “So what?”
• Make a claim about something that
matters to you and/or your readers
--For example, argue the implications of the
current trends in funding of post-secondary
education.
• Show why you are making such a claim.
--Don’t be shy about your rationales or hold off
until later to keep your reader curious—
you’re writing an essay, not a suspense novel.
To get started, three questions:
1. What conclusion can I draw from the
information I’ve gathered so far?
2. How can I express that idea by naming
the topic and making an assertion
about it?
3. How can I convey my purpose in that
assertion?
First-draft Thesis Statement
This paper will compare and contrast
the similarities and differences
between the main characters in The
Bean Trees.
There are surprising similarities and
differences between Taylor Greer and
her boss, Mattie.
Test your thesis statement
• Does it draw a conclusion?
• Does it name the topic and
make a significant assertion
about it?
• Does it convey the purpose?
• Does it answer the question
“So what?”
Thesis statement, draft two
While both the protagonist, Taylor
Greer, and her boss, Mattie, in The
Bean Trees are strong female
characters, Taylor’s resolve to help
two immigrants is not realistic.
Which is better for a 2- to 5-pg paper?
1) The Sex Pistols could not have
succeeded without singer and lyricist
Johnny Rotten, who provided the stage
presence, poetry, and authentic workingclass rage that galvanized the group's
young English audiences.
2) The Sex Pistols were popular with young
English audiences, and the singer and
lyricist Johnny Rotten was very important to
their success.
(from http://bcs.bedfordstmartins.com/writersref6e/Player/Pages/Main.aspx
Exercise C2-1 Thesis statements, Question 3)
Revision practice
Because air pollution is of serious concern
to people in the world today, many
countries have implemented a variety of
plans to begin solving the problem.
Video games are not as mindless as most
people think.
Social workers in Metropolis leave much to
be desired.
(from http://bcs.bedfordstmartins.com/writersref6e/Player/Pages/Main.aspx
Exercise C2-1 Thesis statements)
When to craft a thesis statement?
Short on time? Hone your thesis statement
carefully and then draft the paper.
Have time for (or your assignment
requires) an exploratory draft?
Draft an essay that meanders and
experiments with ideas to discover your
thesis statement.
Thesis Sentence Structures
∞ Claim + reasons or Claim + reasons +
examples
∞ Subordinate clause, main point in
independent clause
∞ Counterargument + rebuttal as claim +
reasons
∞ Claim + reasons + counterargument +
rebuttal
∞ Claim + reasons + examples
Dancing with the Stars should be cancelled because it is
repetitive, overwrought, and there is no longer an audience
for it, as illustrated in recent negative reviews, lower
numbers of voters, and reduced Nielsen ratings.
∞ Subordinate clause, main point in
independent clause
Although research has linked heart disease and diabetes to
the typical diet in the United States, the American food
industry has ignored medical evidence and continues to
market unhealthy products to poorly educated consumers.
Even though its detractors find it repetitive, overwrought,
and its participants less than engaging, Dancing with the
Stars continues to attract such a large audience that ABC
should not cancel it.
∞ Counterargument + rebuttal as claim +
reason(s)
While many find it repetitive, overwrought, and its
participants less than engaging, the formulaic nature
of Dancing with the Stars is accessible to millions,
bridging cultural divides in America.
∞ Claim + reasons + counterargument +
rebuttal
Dancing with the Stars should be cancelled because
it is repetitive, overwrought, and losing its audience,
who, regardless of what the morning talk shows
would have us believe, is not young and flourishing.
Build a thesis statement from a topic
• The Seahawks
• The Kardashians
• Climate change
• Is the Internet rotting our brains?
1.
2.
3.
4.
brainstorm an argument
reasons for your claim
consider possible counterarguments
your rebuttal to strengthen your own stance
Topic: leaf blowers
1. Brainstorm an argument
I hate them because they’re noisy, smelly, use
fossil fuels and so probably produce CO2 and
CO and methane, and they encourage
laziness, so I think they should be banned or
their use limited to certain types of locations
or hours of the day or days of the week.
Claim:
Leaf blowers should be banned outright, or
their use should be limited.
2. Reasons for your claim
They disturb the peace and produce toxic
emissions which are harmful to people’s
health and the environment.
3. Consider counterarguments
Do all leaf blowers run on gasoline? How
much do they save in time and money for
labor compared to brooms and rakes? Is there
a muffler that would prevent the shrill yet
roaring noise? What hours or days of the week
would be permissible? How would such a law
be enforced?
4. Your rebuttal to strengthen your own stance
If not all leaf blowers run on gasoline, then they
should be banned in favor of electric ones. In large
industrial or urban areas, the noise of leaf blowers is
usually less noticeable, but in the suburbs and rural
areas it is a nuisance, and ordinances could clearly
identify leaf blowers as such. The emissions from
gas-powered leaf blowers contribute to the
distribution of particulates harmful to human
respiratory systems and vegetation (Greely). Laws
that prevent the sale of harmful goods could be used
to prevent the sale of gas-powered leaf blowers.
Draft working thesis statement
While leaf blowers may save time and money
in labor costs, regardless of whether they are
gas-powered or electric, we should use
current city and county ordinances to ban leaf
blowers outright because they there are no
modifications to prevent them disturbing the
peace and distributing toxins that are harmful
to people’s health and the environment.
Test your thesis statement
• Does it draw a conclusion?
• Does it name the topic and
make a significant assertion
about it?
• Does it convey the purpose?
• Does it answer the question
“So what?”
Thesis Statement Recap
• The thesis statement is the central
debatable point of an essay.
• It is developed by gathering information
and drawing conclusions about it.
• It makes a specific, meaningful assertion
that you and/or your readers care about.
• It will be influenced by the purpose of
the essay.
• The thesis statement contains ideas
that are expanded upon in detail in the
rest of the essay.
• It can be drafted first, or as a result of
exploring ideas in a draft; it all depends
on you and your situation.
• A thesis statement can take any of
several forms, but it should always
state a claim and the reasons for it.
Bibliography
Fowler, H. Ramsey, Jane E. Aaron, and Janice
Okoomian, eds. The Little, Brown
Handbook. Instructor’s Annotated 8th ed.
New York: Longman, 2001. Print.
Channell, Carolyn E. and Timothy W. Crusius.
Engaging Questions: A Guide to Writing.
New York: McGraw-Hill, 2013. Print.
“The Thesis Statement: What It Is and How to
Write One.” Academic Success Center
Writing Lab. Bellevue College, n.d. Web. 23
Jan. 2015.