Write the term and the description.

Write these…
1. List and describe the communication styles and give 3 examples of each style.
2. Which is the most effective style of communication?
3. List the 3 communication techniques.
Give 2 examples of the first two and 1 of the third.
4. What are ways you let someone know you are listening?

How can I get others to understand me?

Child-like Communication
• Easiest to recognize
• Immature
• Least effective when you are an adult
• Self-centered
• Many teens and adults revert to this style when they are frustrated or upset

Child-like Communication
Examples
• Giving orders
• Whining
• Name calling
• Yelling
• Verbal abuse
• Not listening
• Interrupting
• Topping
• Throwing tantrums
• Acting out of control

Parent-like Communication
• Has nothing to do with age or being a parent
• Directing other ’ s behaviors
• Effective in getting others to comply
• One-way or dictatorial
• Gets the point across
• Affects the behavior of others
• Commonly used with those using child-like communication

Parent-like Communication
Examples:
• Giving Instructions
• Directing
• Punishing
• Demanding
• Ordering
• Talking down to
• “ Mom, get me a cookie.
”
• “ Go get my book out of my locker.
”
• “ Lend me a dollar ”

Adult-like Communication
• Highest level
• Most desirable
• Most Effective

Adult-like Communication
Examples:
• Taking responsibility for comments and actions
• Remaining calm
• Showing respect for others ’ feelings and opinions
• Having trust in others
• Controlling emotions while discussing

Which is the most effective style of communication?

Which is the most effective style of communication?
Adult

Shank
Is like Non-Verbal
Communication
It is strong and can be used to support construction or destruction

Claw
Is like Destructive
Communication
It is sharp and dangerous and is used to destroy and tear down relationships

Head
Is like Constructive
Communication
It is smooth and rounded and is used to build and help put things together

Handle
Is like Us, the driving force
We are in control of our communication. We choose to use it in a constructive or destructive manner.

Communication

Destructive Communication
• Threatening
• Sarcasm
• Interrupting
• Swearing
• Insulting
• Harassing
• Teasing
• Gossip
• Lies
• Sexual Harassment
• Blaming
• Endless Fighting
• Character
Assassination
• Calling in
Reinforcements
• Withdrawal
• Need to be Right
• Playing the Martyr
• “ You ” Messages

Constructive Communication
• Timing
• Asking Questions
• Clarifying
• Reflective Listening
• Respect
• Consideration
• Listening
• Avoiding Intense
Emotions
• Honesty/Openness
• Positive &
Encouraging
• Keeping Confidences
• “ I ” Messages

“ I ” Messages
• Help to decrease tension and defensiveness
• Simple structure:
– I feel __________ when _______________.
– Use feeling words for the first blank
– Use what is happening or causing the problem in the second blank
– I feel angry when you ignore what I am saying.

Two Types of Communication
1. Verbal
2. Non-verbal

Verbal Communication
• The interaction between people

Race for Life
• Find a partner
• Partner no.1 must close his/her eyes
• Starting with course no. 1, give your partner directions to get them to the finish line.
• Switch

 It is possible to send one type of verbal message and at the same time, a different type with body language.

 Nonverbal communication is VERY powerful and can often be misinterpreted.

Concentrate
• Eliminate distractions so that you can listen more carefully.
• For example: turn off the radio or tv or move to a quieter area while someone is speaking to you

Keep an open mind
• Be prepared to accept the other person’s point of view.

Listen with a purpose
• Identify why you are listening.
• For example: you listen to your friend’s problems to let them express their feelings.

Be positive
• Assuming a positive attitude before a person starts talking will help motivate you to listen and remember.

Make eye contact
• Look the speaker in the eye and keep your expression open and interested.

Control your emotions
• If the speaker’s message affects you emotionally, stay calm and listen. Then present your views.

Non verbal communication
5 Squares activity
• Each person will have an envelope containing pieces for forming squares.
• The task of the group is to form 5 squares of equal size.
• The task is not completed until everyone in the group has a perfect square and all the squares are the same size.

Game Rules:
• You may only use the pieces provided.
• No member may speak or gesture in any way throughout the activity.
• Members may not ask another member for a piece; take a piece from another member, or signal in any way that another person is to give them a piece.
• Members may give pieces to other members.
• Members may not place their puzzle pieces in the center area for other team members to take.
• Let me know when the group has assembled all puzzles.

Questions???
1.
How did you feel when someone held a piece and did not see the solution?
2.
What was your reaction when someone finished a square and then sat back without seeing whether his or her solution prevented others from solving the problem?
3.
What were your feelings if you finished your square and then began to realize that you would have to break it up and give away a piece?
4.
How did you feel about the person who was slow to see a solution?
If you were the slow person, how did you feel?
5.
How did you feel when someone gave you a part you needed?
6.
Was there a climate of helping or hindering?

What ’ s your communication style?