Psychology 0f Personal Effectiveness All You Need To Know About How To Live Happily & Effectively Timothy W. Starkey, Ph.D., ABAP • • • • • • • • Miami Dade College Psyc CLP 1006 Hialeah Campus Room 1214 M/W/F 8:00-10:15 AM May 7- June 16 (2007) 305-279-0758 (Home) or 305-338-1615 (Cell) Chapter 5. The Art of Coping Gracefully Hours 1:00 to 5:00 PM On Mondays & Wednesdays 1 Relaxation • Most people confuse inactivity with relaxation. You might say, “I DO relax… I go home and sit down in front of the TV set and watch my favorite programs… I only get up for a beer”. • The facts are, however, that when subjects’ level of stress while watching their favorite TV program is measured by physiological monitors, the results show that there is little if any reduction in stress while watching TV. • Passive relaxation, like watching TV, is not very effective in reducing stress. • Active relaxation, on the other hand, has been shown to be much more effective. It involves becoming aware of your body and your physiological reactions so that you may consciously reduce your level of arousal. 2 Diaphragmatic Breathing • • 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. The key to any practice of active relaxation is to relearn proper breathing patterns. Breathing slowly, deeply, and regularly is the easiest and most accessible relaxation technique. Most of the time we’re unaware of our breathing patterns. Let’s first begin by discovering where you are now: Sit with your back supported. Put your feet flat on the floor and close your eyes. Place one hand on your chest and the other on your diaphragm (the muscle right above your stomach). Focus on your breathing. Notice the pattern and rhythm as you breathe in and out. Take a few deep breaths and notice as you breathe in and out which hand moves more (usually it’s the hand on the chest) 3 The Value of Self Awareness • All humans have the ability to be more aware of our bodily processes and sensations than we generally are. We tend to ignore bodily stimuli in order to focus more on things outside of our bodies. • We can even learn to become more aware of our psychological processes, too. Take mood, for instance. How many times have you observed that somebody close to you or that you work with is in a bad mood… or looks depressed. Have you noticed that when you first mention this to them, they almost automatically deny it… and only later (perhaps) admit that you were right. This is an example of being in a mood but not being consciously aware of it at the time (until somebody points it out to you). 4 Case Example 1. You • Take out a blank piece of paper and write down what your current mood is this morning. • Fold the paper in half and hand it to the student on your left who will make a “+” sign if he/she agrees or a “-” if he/she disagrees with your statement of mood. • Now give it to the student on your right and he/she will do the same… and then give it back to you. • Now let’s see if your self-awareness of mood agrees or disagrees with the impressions of those around you. IF YOU LISTEN TO YOUR BODY WHEN IT WHISPERS, YOU WON’T HAVE TO LISTEN TO IT SCREAM. 5 Stress Hardiness Attitudes • • • 1. 2. 3. Research has revealed that the attitude you have at the beginning of a task determines the outcome of that task more than any other single factor. Self-fulfilling prophecies can be either positive or negative, depending on your expectations. Studies have shown that there are three attitudes that that appear to make people more resistant to the negative effects of stress. Control Commitment Challenge 6 • People who are the most resistant to stress have the attitude that they are in control of their lives. They possess what we discussed earlier as an “internal locus of control”. They do not wait for fate to lead them in the right direction; instead, they work to take active control over their lives. This same attitude has been described as “proactivity” (Stephen Covey) • Commitment involves believing that what you do is of value and importance. Individuals showing this attitude have an optimistic outlook and stressors are seen as potentially interesting and meaningful. (This reminds me of an old Chinese curse: “May you live in interesting times.”) • Every crisis, no matter how grave, has some inherent opportunities. Those who cope with stress well are those who look for these opportunities and capitalize on them. Those who cope poorly get paralyzed by the inherent danger. • “Life is trouble, only death is not. To be alive is to undo your belt and go looking for trouble.” (Zorba from Zorba The Greek) 7 8 What Your Score Means Score Interpretation 10-18 Hardy Personality 0-9 Moderate Hardiness Below 0 Low Hardiness Do you agree with this rating of your hardiness? Why or why not? 9 Effects of Hurricane Andrew • On August 24th of 1992, a Category 5 hurricane named “Hurricane Andrew” struck Miami with wind gusts of over 212 mph. It was the second most destructive hurricane in U.S. history, and the final of three Category 5 hurricanes to make landfall in the United States in the 20th century. • Andrew's damage cost totaled $26 billion in 1992 ($45 billion in 2005 US dollars), with most of the cost concerning damage in south Florida. The storm caused 65 deaths. After the initial shock of the unbelievable devastation that had been done, especially in the Homestead, Perrine, and SW unincorporated Miami areas, the community rallied and set to work clearing away the rubble and rebuilding where possible. • Organizations (hospitals), churches, and community organizations all worked side by side to help the homeless and the injured ~ both medically and psychologically. Looting was minimal and what there was was quickly eliminated by National Guard troops and armed citizens patrolling the night. • It was a test of the character of an entire community, and community came together rather than fragmenting before the massive devastation and loss. 10 Progressive Relaxation Sequence • • 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. In 1929, a Chicago physician (Jacobson) theorized that physical tension leads up to mental tension which further exacerbates physical tension. He believed that learning to relax your body should promote mental relaxation and lowered stress levels. Guidelines for using Progressive Relaxation Sequence: Prepare a convenient time and place Set up a regular practice schedule. Be comfortable - wear loose fitting clothes Avoid falling asleep. Don’t try too hard. Allow yourself to “let go”. Keep your mind’s focus on your breathing. Finish your relaxation practice by coming back slowly. 11 Typical Instructions for Progressive Muscle Relaxation 12 13 Meditation • Many people believe that one of the most powerful and efficient methods for reducing stress is to include regular meditation in your life. • Some studies have shown that regular meditation (6 days a week for 8 weeks) can increase activation in a part of the brain associated with decreased arousal and increased positive emotion, as well as suppress activity in the amygdala, which is the fear and anxiety center of our brain. • People who regularly meditate report less stress, anxiety, depression, and hostility than do non-meditators. 14 Attitudes for Mindfulness Meditation • 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. Mindfulness is the cultivation of awareness by practicing awareness. Non-Judging Patience Beginner’s Mind Trust Non-Striving Acceptance Letting Go 15 The Practice of Meditation • Meditation can be divided into techniques which emphasize focused concentration on a word, sound, image, physical movement or posture, or on techniques which emphasize the the cultivation of mindfulness or awareness in each present moment. • Focused concentration - find a quiet place to sit in a comfortable position with an erect spine. You can then focus on a wide variety of things, ranging from your breathing to a word or phrase (a “mantra”). • Once you have chosen your “focal point”, you simply sit still and bring your attention to it. To use breathing as an example, you would bring your attention to the in and out movements of your breathing, and perhaps repeat the words “in” on the inhalation and “out” on the exhalation. This is basically it in terms of technique. You have to guard against letting your thoughts get in the way of your focusing. 16 The Importance of Stretching Your Muscles • An intrinsic part of the fight/flight response is muscle tension. When muscles tighten, they also shorten. One way to reverse the fight/flight response is to lengthen the muscles. This is accomplished by simply (and carefully) stretching your muscles. • Many people notice that yawning is accompanied by an almost instinctual urge to lean back or extend one’s arms. • We are very aware of the need to stretch after sitting in a car for several hours or at a desk for half a day without getting up. • Massage also has a very beneficial effect on reducing stress and inducing a feeling of overall well-being. • Studies with children who suffered Hurricane Andrew showed that professional massage was effective in effectively reducing levels of the stress hormone cortisol and manifest stress; the control group watched a relaxing video for the same amount of time and did not show any reduction in cortisol or manifest stress. 17 End of Chapter 5 An Actual Photograph of a Greyhound After Receiving A Professional Massage 18