This title is for centering.
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Please unwrap candies and turn off
beepers and cell phones prior to the performance.
Photography of any kind is prohibited.
- There he is! My husband!
- What was that? - The room is bewitched!
He's my husband, I stake my claim on him!
God is my witness!
Court! The government! The Empress must give him back!
What does she want with me, Innkeeper?
Let the devil patronize your damned private room!
He dares deny me, like he doesn't know me!
And he's alive!
God knows, I've never seen that baggage!
- It's true, he wants to marry again, the villain!
- Get rid of her and bring the supper!
- He wants another innocent young girl, like I was!
- Today's the last day I set foot in this dive!
Am I in a madhouse? A plague on all of you!
Am I or am I not the Baron von Lerchenau?
Am I in full possession of my faculties?
- Yes, you are he, and I am your wife!
- Is this a candle, this a napkin?!
- Reflect, Anton von Lerchenau, you'll answer to the Almighty!
- She looks familiar. They both have double faces!
- That poor Frau Baroness!
- Do you hear the voices of your own flesh and blood?
- Get rid of all of them for me!
- (Has someone gone to get Faninal?)
- (He'll be here shortly.)
- Careful, things could get rough!
- Rough!? From that old bag?
I've never touched her. I wouldn't touch her with a fire poker!
- Bigamy's a capital offense!
Bigamy?!
Throw out the old nag! What? Who?
Police! The lackeys won't? Are you all in on this together?
Are we in France? Are we with the Turks?
Or are we in the Imperial capital?
Police! Come quickly!
Restore order, and hasten to help a person of rank!
- Halt! No one move! Who's making a scene here?
- (What shall we do?)
- (Leave it to me, and let things take their course.)
It's all right now. I am most pleased with you.
I always believed that in Vienna everything runs like clockwork.
Get this rabble away from me. I wish to dine in peace.
Who are you? The Innkeeper?
If not, keep quiet and wait until you are questioned.
- Where is the Innkeeper?
- I commend myself to the Lord High Commissary's authority!
- This tavern speaks badly of you. Explain, from the beginning!
- Commissary, sir!
- The Baron…
- That big fat one there? Where's his wig?
- I was about to ask you that.
- That is Baron von Lerchenau!
- Insufficient. - What?!
- Can someone here vouch for you?
- Right here! There, my secretary, an Italian.
Excuse me, I know nothing.
He might be a Baron, he might not.
- That's too much! You lying Italian skunk!
- You calm down!
- My God, I wish I could sink into the earth!
- Who is this girl?
- She? No one. She's under my protection.
You'll soon have need of protection.
Who is she, and what is she doing here?
- I hope you're not one of those damned debauchers!
How'd you come by this girl? I want answers!
- I'm jumping in the river!
Innkeeper, what's over there?
What kind of business do you run here?
- When people of rank come for supper…
- Shut up! I'll deal with you later.
I'm going to count to three, and then I want to know
how you came to be with this young girl! You'd better not lie!
It shouldn't seem improper to you, sir, when a person of rank
decides to have a supper at nine with his bride to be.
She's your bride? Give me the name and address of her father.
If it's true, then you may leave with the young girl.
- I really don't like being spoken to this way…
- Answer, or I'll sing a different tune.
I won't withhold anything. She's the young Miss Faninal Sophia,
Anna, Barbara, daughter Herr von Faninal of Hof.
I'm here. What did you want of me?
Look at you!
I never expected to be called out to a common dive like this!
- Who the hell called you here?
- What's with the pig-witted question, son-in-law?
You sent messengers who almost beat down my door,
saying I had to come and help you out of an awkward situation.
- Who's this man? What's he to do with you?
- Nothing important, just an acquaintance, staying at the inn.
- He will give us his name!
- I am the noble von Faninal.
- So this is the father.
- Certainly not! He's a kinsman, a brother, a nephew!
What's going on here? I'm the bride's father!
- Leave this to me. Go away!
- I beg your pardon?! - Go home!
How dare you drag my honored name into such a squabble,
Mister Son-In-Law?
- He's fixated on that. It's an inside joke.
- That's enough for me. This man is your son-in-law?
Of course! How could I not recognize him?
Because he doesn't have his wig on?!
And you recognize that this gentleman is your father-in-law?
Well, sure. Yes, it's him, of course.
I haven't been myself this evening.
I can't trust my eyes. Something's in the air.
It's giving me serious congestion.
Against this, do you deny that you are father of this person,
said to be your daughter?
- My daughter? That slut claims to be my daughter?
- A joke! A misunderstanding!
The Innkeeper told the Commissary there
about my engagement with the Faninal girl!
I didn't say it, it was his own statement.
Arrest that girl! Off with her! Have her whipped!
Have her locked up in a convent! I… I…
Go home. Tomorrow I'll explain everything to you.
Remember, you owe me.
You said it?! My daughter must come up!
She's sitting downstairs in the sedan. Up here! Quickly!
- You'll pay dearly for this! I'll bring you to court!
- You're making a stink of nothing.
A gentleman needs patience to be your son-in-law!
I want my wig!
- What is this?
- Nothing! A swindle! She says she was married to me!
I'd sooner be remembered like Pilate in the Credo,
than to get myself in this kind of a mess!
- The bride! What a scandal!
- There, look! There's your bridegroom, and his wife, and kids!
There's his little piece on the side! In his own words!
Would you like to sink into the earth? Me too!
I am overjoyed. I don't see him as my bridegroom!
You don't? My good name!
I won't dare show my face again!
Dogs won't even take bread from me!
The whole of Vienna! The black scandal sheet!
There! Out of the cellar! Out of the air!
You villain! I feel sick! I need a chair!